Love Lies Bleeding
by aedy
Summary: Kurt and Puck have been together for a while now but their relationship is still a secret and it's when Noah starts to pull away that Kurt discovers something that will change their lives forever. MPREG
1. Waiting

**Title**: Love Lies Bleeding  
**Summary**: Kurt and Puck have been together for a while now but their relationship is still a secret and it's when Noah starts to pull away that Kurt discovers something that will change their lives forever. Through hard times, relationships end and start and more than one special friendship is forged.  
**Characters**: Kurt Hummel, Noah Puckerman, Rachel Berry, Burt Hummel, Other Canon Characters  
**Genre**: Romance, Angst, Friendship, Comfort, Family  
**Warnings**: OOC, MPreg  
**Pairing**: Puck/Kurt  
**A/N**: This takes place at the beginning of season 2. Quinn never got pregnant so Puck never become the better persone he was by the end of season 1. I'm going to use some things from the second season but not everything. No Blaine and no Karofsky-kiss. I wanted to post this story when it was finished, but since I'm in the middle of chapter 4 and up until now I've written close to 18000 words, and I already have ideas for the end, I'm fairly sure that I'm going to finish it, so evne though the updates won't be quickly, don't be afraid of not seeing the end. It's a fill for a prompt on the Puckurt meme.  
**Rating**: PG-13 for this chapter  
Beta: lemon_drop151**

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Prologue - Waiting

_I'm the same I was when we first met,  
And now I feel you're pulling away._

Puck's hand, warm and strong, closed in Kurt's hair and, for a moment, the boy inhaled the scent of his lover; his breath, coming out in a pant, caressed the blushed skin of the other teen.

Kurt's hands were resting on Puck's shoulder blades and his legs were tangled with the other boy's. When he felt Noah's nose nuzzling the skin of his neck, he squeezed his eyes shut wanting to hold onto the moment for as long as he could.

When Puck finally pulled out with a sigh and then flopped down next to him on the bed, Kurt opened his eyes and fixed his gaze to the ceiling.

The jock entwined his fingers with the soprano's and Kurt, not for the first time, wondered how long was it going to be before the continuous hot and cold of his lover would tire him out.

"What would happen if I met someone else?" The pale boy's voice sounded strange to his own ears; even weak and unsteady, it pierced through the quiet room. They were over at Kurt's once again; it was simpler that way for Puck, for when he'd suddenly realize that cuddle up with Kurt was more gay than have sex with him, and would shoot out of bed, get dressed and leave in record time.

"You could fuck him," Puck's answer pulled Kurt out of his thoughts.

"What if I fall in love with someone else and dumped you?" Kurt really didn't want to think that he had practically told the boy that he loved him. It was pointless after all since Puck didn't feel the same away about him.

Noah's fingers tightened for a second before releasing their hold around the other boy's ones. The soprano sighed; time was up... it was happening faster and faster lately.

Puck tensed on the bed next to him before getting up and starting to pull on his jeans. "It's not like we're in a relationship or anything..." The jock turned his back to the bed and bent down to retrieve his t-shirt.

Kurt followed every movement with his eyes, keeping his gaze fixed on the dimple between the muscular shoulders until it was covered by the blue t-shirt that the other teen had been wearing before they engaged in their activity.

"Do you sleep with other people?" He found himself asking, and really, he wondered why he just couldn't stop asking stupid questions that would only end up hurting him.

Puck sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed so he could put on his shoes. "Hummel," he glanced at Kurt for only a moment before quickly getting up and walking over to the stairs that took from the boy's bedroom, to the main area of the house. He waved a hand between himself and Kurt, saying, "It's just sex." Then, without leaving room for an answer, he jogged up the stairs.

"Of course," Kurt whispered, so lowly that he was pretty sure the jock didn't hear him. He kept his eyes to the ceiling while the echo of his lover's footsteps grew feeble until finally, he heard the front door slam shut.

He sighed and closed his eyes.


	2. I'll Be There For You

**Chapter 1 - I'll Be There For You  
**_  
No one could ever know me_  
_No one could ever see me_  
_Seems you're the only one who knows_  
_Someone to face the day with_

Kurt leaned his forehead against the cool ceramic of his toilet and panted slightly from the exhausting exercise of throwing up his whole breakfast.

He took a deep breath, pushed away from the bowl and sat on his heels. He heard a knock on his bathroom door and then his father's voice asking if he was ok. He got up from the floor and went to open the door. He smiled tentatively up at his dad. "I'm fine."

"Were you throwing up?" Burt asked, frowning.

"Yeah, must have been the pancakes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," Kurt replied with a nod. "I'm late for school and I still have to shower so..."

The older Hummel nodded still unsure of whether he should believe his son or not. In the end, he adjusted his cap and looked straight into the boy's eyes. "Ok. I'm going to work now. Remember to lock the door when you leave and to drive carefully."

This time, Kurt's smile was genuine. "Ok, Dad. I'll see you tonight."

"Later, kid."

Kurt closed the door to the bathroom and then stepped in front of the mirror. He studied his reflection for several minutes but was unable to recognize himself. He looked tired these days and not even the thought of the glee club could cheer him up. Sighing, he turned toward the shower and started it.

*GLEE*

When Kurt drove his Navigator inside the McKinley High's parking lot, he spotted the football team waiting by the dumpster right away.

Parking his SUV, the teen took a moment to collect himself; he leaned his forehead against the steering wheel and let out a tired sigh. After several minutes, when he was sure that he'd be able to act like his normal self, Kurt grabbed his bag and got out of the car.

"Hey, fairy!" One of the jocks called out to him as soon as he was close enough to the dumpster.

"What do you want dickhead?" He asked, turning around.

The football player seemed taken aback by the unusual scurrilous comeback.

"What? Cat got your..." Kurt's words were cut off when an all too familiar pair of arms slid under his and pulled him back against a muscular chest.

"What's going on, boys?" When Puck spoke, his breath caressed the soprano's neck sending a shiver up and down his spine. He pushed Kurt towards the dumpster saying, "C'mon, Hummel, you know the drill."

The pale boy hated when something as simple as a breath coming from the other boy could set him on fire. So, wanting to pretend that he was unaffected because it was just another morning after all, Kurt pulled away from Noah's hold. "You always do the same things. One would think that your little brains could come up with something new after all this time, but no..." He threw his bag on the ground not caring that it would look like completely out of character and then slid off his jacked handing it over to one of the jocks.

He turned to Puck with his head held high. "Well then, what are you waiting for?"

When his lover simply shrugged before spun him around so he could grab him again, Kurt asked himself if falling in love with Noah, was worth being torn apart by Puck.

His back hit the trash bags and the cardboards and the lid sliding closed, softened the fading sound of laughter. Kurt was starting to have doubts that it was worth it.

*GLEE*

By the time lunch rolled around, Kurt was feeling exhausted and was also starting to doubt his theatrical abilities since it seemed that he wasn't hiding his discomfort well enough; Mercedes kept glancing at him worriedly and even Rachel was looking at him with concern.

Not wanting to have to face the entire glee club and all the questions about how he was feeling, he grabbed his tray with only an apple and a bottle of water on it and went in search of an empty classroom where he could eat on his own.

Knowing that most of the class on the first floor were occupied or closed, he went to the second floor. He was about to step inside the last class of the hall when the door to the janitor closet, that was next to the classroom, opened, and Santana and Puck walked out of it.

The cheerleader straightened her skirt and her ponytail before locking eyes with Kurt arching an eyebrow.

Puck tensed up for a moment before sliding his hands inside the pockets of his letterman jacket. "What's the problem, Hummel? Never seen two people having fun before?"

Santana snickered before starting to walk away. "Call me later!" she yelled, before rounding the corner at the end of the hall.

Puck watched her go until he was sure that she wasn't coming back before turning his attention back on Kurt. He noticed that the soprano was holding his tray so tight that his knuckles had turned white. He decided not to address the problem because as far as he was concerned, he didn't do anything wrong to deserve Hummel's anger.

"Do you have a minute?" The jock asked, looking at the pale boy with a leer.

Kurt glared at him before turning around and starting to leave, suddenly not feeling hungry anymore.

"Kurt!"

"Screw you, Puckerman!" Kurt kept on walking desperately telling himself not to turn around, and knowing that Puck was never going to follow him, made everything easier.

He was able to reach the girls bathroom before breaking down; being so emotional was never his thing, he was the Ice Queen, always sarcastic and caustic. However, lately, it was like the more Puck became detached, the more Kurt became attached to whatever they had going on.

They had been in their sort of "agreement", because you couldn't call what they had relationship, for almost five months now and it was getting harder and harder for Kurt to act as if being Puck's dirty little secret wasn't affecting him.

Sometimes, when they were alone, Puck would act like the most perfect boyfriend in the world, always caring and gentle except for when they both wanted something rough, but then, when they were among other people, Noah would disappear, leaving at his place a jerk with a mohawk that wouldn't be gentle with the soprano if his life depended on it.

Kurt put the tray on the sink counter putting the apple and the water in his bag before opening one of the faucets. He splashed some cold water on his face and once again found himself studying his expression in the mirror. He was following the water drops' pat on his cheeks through the mirror when the door opened and Rachel, her white jumper drenched in something blue, walked inside.

The girl wiped some of the iced beverage out of her eyes before opening them; she froze catching sight of Kurt.

"Slushie?" The soprano asked, turning towards his bag and pulling out a packet of moist towelettes that he handed to the brunette.

"Thanks. Azimio wanted a laugh with his lunch," she said, walking over to the sink next to the boys. She glanced at him sideways while wiping the slushie off of her face. "Are you okay, Kurt?"

He nodded. "Why are you asking?"

"You weren't at lunch today and you, don't take this personally," she held up her hands with a tentative smile. "But you seem a little off and you're paler than usual."

"I..." Kurt's reply was cut off when a wave of nausea hit him full force. Covering his mouth with his left hand, the boy hurried inside one of the stalls barely managing to reach the toilet before throwing up.

Rachel watched with wide eyes and a second or two went by before she was able to spring into action and run over to Kurt. The girl put a hand on his back and started rubbing it softly.

After what to him felt like an eternity, Kurt finally stopped puking. He got up with Rachel's help and walked back to the sinks to rinse his mouth. "Thank you," he said in a whisper; his throat too sore to be able to speak loudly.

Rachel nodded. "Was this the first time it happened?"

"No." Kurt closed the faucet and looked over at the girl. "It's been going on for a while now."

"You should see a doctor," the singer said, before handing the packet of moist towelettes back to the boy. "Do you have one?"

"Yes."

"Good. As the captain of our glee club, I feel the need to ensure my teammates' welfare."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Thank you, Rachel."

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but," she put a hand on her friend's shoulder. "I think you should skip glee and see if your doctor will see you this afternoon."

"I can just say that I have a sore throat and Mr. Shue will just let me watch so I won't be putting myself to strain."

"You don't look too well, Kurt, I'm serious," Rachel said softly, turning her big doe eyes on him. "It's Friday; go home and contact your doctor and then rest for the week-end." She smiled. "Every diva needs her beauty rest."

"I will ignore the fact that you just called me a girl and," he sighed, tilting his head to the side and squeezing his eyes a little. "I will take your advice."

"Great."

"Just, don't tell everyone that I had to go home because I was sick."

Rachel shook her head. "I will come up with something, don't worry."

"Thank you." Kurt picked up his bag and waved at the singer before stepping out of the bathroom.

Lunch break was almost over so he had to hurry up if he wanted to get out of school before Mercedes spotted him. He hurried down the halls and got outside through a backdoor then he ran to his SUV and before someone could see him, he drove away.

During the drive he kept the radio turned off because he was starting to feel a headache coming and, even though November's air was pretty chill, he kept his window down; the cool air somehow calming down his nausea. When he finally arrived home, he called his doctor and got an appointment for Monday briefly wincing at having to skip glee once again.

With a sigh, he went down to his room and kicked his shoes off before staggering over to the bed when he let himself fall on the mattress with a tired breath.

*GLEE*

When the last bell of the day rang, Puck was catching a nap in the nurse office. Finn came to get him and together, they walked over to the glee club.

Brittany, Santana and Quinn were sitting in the chairs in the last row; Mike, Sam and Artie were talking together in a corner while Mercedes and Tina were sitting in the front row and Rachel in the middle row.

Puck frowned noticing that Kurt still had to arrive but didn't ask for him. Finn and him went to sit down next to Rachel and a few seconds later, Mr. Shue walked in with his usual joyfully expression in place.

However, when the teacher noticed that Kurt was missing, the smile faded away leaving place to a frown. "Where's Kurt?"

Rachel cleared her throat and everyone's gaze turned on her. "He had to go home," she fidget with the hem of her skirt. "His father called and he told me to inform you that he couldn't make it to glee today."

"Wait," Mercedes' voice rang loud in the choir room. "He left and told _you _about it?"

"Well, Mercedes," Rachel's tone _I'm-better-than-you_ was back and Puck briefly marveled at how much alike her and Kurt were. "I was there when it happened."

The black girl mumbled something under her breath before pulling her cellphone out of her bag.

Mr. Shue sighed and looked at Rachel. "Well, thank you for telling me, Rachel."

"As the captain of New Directions, it was my responsibility." That earned an eye-roll from everyone.

Puck had been in silence and was now glancing at Mercedes trying to understand what was going on from her expression while she texted Kurt. He had to refrain himself from pulling out his own phone; checking on Kurt would have been too boyfriend-like and they weren't in a relationship after all.

"Well, I hope that someone will be able to get next week assignment to Kurt." Mr. Shue said, looking uncertainly between Mercedes and Rachel as if he wasn't sure which one of the girl will talk to Kurt sooner.

"Anyway, next week assignment is to prepare a song that will express how you feel in this moment. You can choose whatever song you want, but this time, you will have to focus on the lyrics more than on the music."

*GLEE*

It was late at night when Puck's truck stopped a few houses from the Hummel residence. Noah frowned down at the steering wheel still trying to understand what he was doing or why he had decided that since by the time glee had ended Kurt still had to answer to Mercedes' texts, he needed to check up on his lover.

He pulled out his cellphone and saw that it was already 12:30 a.m. and wondered if maybe he should have just called or texted Kurt. Finally, coming to a decision, Puck got out of the truck and started to walk towards the Hummel's house. The soprano always left the window to his bedroom open for the running back and even if it was pretty reckless (because really, anyone could use it) he was happy to find that when he reached the window, and pushed, it opened.

The room was dark and Kurt's soft breathing was the only sound. Puck took off his shoes and quietly walked over to the bed, partly because he didn't want to wake Burt Hummel, and partly because even though he pretended not to notice, Kurt looked tired and he didn't want to disturb his sleep.

Noah looked down at the sleeping form of his lover and couldn't help but smile, he didn't know what was so special about this boy that kept him coming back for more, that made him wish to be someone better and that scared him so much that he was starting to feel like he had to pull away before it was too late because it was everything getting to be too much; he only knew that he just couldn't stay away. He knew that as long as Kurt wouldn't dump him, he would keep going back no matter how much of an asshole he was when they were in public; he was simply too selfish to let the pale boy go.

Puck put his jacket on the chair of the boy's desk and then gently pulled the covers back and slid underneath and an instant later, Kurt rolled toward him leaning his head on the jock's chest; a soft sigh escaped the beautiful lips that Noah loved to kiss until they were swollen.

"Noah?" Kurt whispered, still with his eyes closed and more asleep than awake.

"You skipped glee today," he said in the same soft tone, starting to combine his fingers through the other boy's soft locks.

"I wasn feelin 'right..." his words came out all slurred.

Puck slid his free arm around Kurt's waist pulling him closer. "Are you ok now?"

"'m tired."

"Sleep tight then, Kurt."

The boy fisted Puck's shirt trying to get closer. "N 'night, Noah."

"Good night, Kurt."

Hours later, when the sunlight coming through his window awoke Kurt, Puck was gone.

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Thank you so much for all the reviews on the prologue! Let me know what you think of this chapter!


	3. With a Little Help From a Friend

**Chapter 2 - With a Little Help From a Friend**

_What would you think if I sang out of tune, _  
_Would you stand up and walk out on me ? _  
_Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song _  
_And I'll try not to sing out of key. _  
_Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends_

Kurt fixed his cap and straightened his jacket. It was Monday and he was getting ready to go to school and face Mercedes. The black girl had texted and called him all Friday, but the boy hadn't wanted to talk to anyone so he had simply texted her back saying "_Everything is okay. See you at school on Monday_" and then had turned off his phone.

He had spent the week-end between his room and the sofa in the living room; Burt had been so worried that he had kept on asking Kurt if everything was fine, if something had happened or if he had a fight with Mercedes, to which the boy had simply replied that he didn't have to worry which had only worried Burt more.

Picking up his bag, car keys and phone, he quickly got upstairs waving his father goodbye and walking over to the door.

"Kurt?" Burt's voice stilled his son.

"Yeah, dad?" Kurt asked, turning around.

"Aren't you going to eat something before leaving?" The worry was still clear in his voice.

"I'm not really hungry."

The older Hummel sighed. "Are you okay?" His son nodded quickly but Burt wasn't ready to let it go. "Kurt, I don't know what to do when you shut me out. We're supposed to talk if something is wrong and no," he held up his hand to stop Kurt when the boy opened his mouth to talk. "I don't believe for a moment that you're okay. I get that you're sixteen and I'm your father, not your friend, but if you have a problem, I need to know it."

Kurt lowered his eyes in shame. "Dad, I..." he gulped and raised his gaze to meet his father's. "I'm not ready to talk about it."

Burt sighed. "Are you talking at least with Mercedes about it?"

"No. I'm trying to figure out what's going on."

"Ok," the man nodded and took his son in his arms hugging him tightly. He felt Kurt close his arms around him after a few moments, right before the boy hid his face in his shoulder. "When you know, come to me, ok? You should let me take care of you like I let you take care of me." Burt felt his son nod against his shoulder. He pulled back and when he looked down into Kurt's blue eyes, he found unshed tears. "I love you, son, no matter what, ok?"

"Love you too, dad."

"Good," Burt gave the boy a small smile. "Go to school now. You're late." Kurt chuckled before giving his father a kiss on the cheek before leaving his house.

* GLEE *

The talk with his father had left Kurt feeling raw and exposed and the boy was glad to be late to school; the jocks were already inside and he wouldn't have to face Puck for the first time after Friday night in that horrible way.

He parked the SUV and ran inside just as the bell to the first period rang. He hurried to the French class and took a seat in the back.

French was one of the few classes he didn't have with anyone from glee and was happy to know that until third period, he wouldn't have to face anyone that cared enough about him to notice that something was off.

As luck would have it, while he was walking to his second period class, he ran into Rachel.

"Hey, Kurt!" The girl said nervously. He got why; they weren't really friends, they barely tolerated each other on a good day, but in that bathroom on Friday, something had changed; they weren't best friends now, but they were close to something that could become a good friendship.

"Good morning, Rachel."

"Listen, I wanted to ask you if you were okay and if you were able to see your doctor."

"I have an appointment this afternoon," he ignored the question about his well being because he didn't even know what to answer to that anymore. "I will have to skip glee again."

"Oh," Rachel looked at him with a smile. "Do you need someone with you?"

"I..."

"Oh, I guess you want to ask Mercedes. You had to see her the other day when I knew where..."

"Rachel!" Kurt grabbed her shoulders to catch her attention. "I was just going to ask you if you were really thinking to skip glee for me."

The girl's features softened. "As the captain..."

"Seriously?"

"Ok, I'm worried. You're my only competition and I need you on top-form or I won't feel motivated anymore."

Kurt smiled a little. "Thanks for your honesty."

"So, do you want me to come?"

"I can't ask Mercedes because I'd have too many questions to answer and I can't right now. My dad already knows that something is wrong and I need someone less demanding right now."

"Ok," Rachel nodded her head vigorously. "Be there for you without getting nosy. I can do that."

"Are you sure?" Kurt asked with his eyebrow arched.

"Yes."

"Ok," the boy said with a nod. "We have to leave right after last period."

"Alright, I just need to find Mr. Shue and tell him that I have to go home earlier today."

"Great. I have to go now or I'll be late."

"See you later, Kurt." Rachel waved before disappearing through the sea of students.

Kurt headed towards the math class wondering how was he going to make it up to Mercedes if she found out about him going to the doctor with Rachel instead of asking for his best friend's company.

*GLEE*

Kurt's third period was chemistry and he shared that class with Sam; the blond wasn't too bright in most of the subjects, but English and chemistry were his strengths, which was why Kurt sat with him through both classes.

The soprano was one of the last students to enter the laboratory since he had to stop at the bathroom on the way over when a wave of nausea had hit him. As soon as he walked inside the lab, Sam greeted him with a smile before waving him over.

"Hey," He greeted the football player.

"Hey, Kurt. You weren't at glee on Friday," The quarterback casually said while getting his book out of his bag.

"Yeah, I had to go home."

"Right," The blond nodded smiling. "Is your dad ok?"

"Huh?" Kurt looked at Sam confused.

"Rachel said that your father asked you to go home and I thought that maybe he was sick or something."

"Oh, no, he's ok but thank you for asking;" He replied with a smile that the blond jock returned. Any further conversation between them was stopped when the teacher demanded silence.

They were half way through the class when Kurt turned to Sam and said, "Hey, Sam, can I ask you a favor?"

"Sure," the quarterback replied while measuring the alcohol they wound need for their experiment.

"I can't come to glee later so I was wondering if you could tell Mr. Shue that I had to get home."

Sam glanced at him before putting down the test-tube he was about to fill. Then, he turned to Kurt. "Are you ok? It's the second time that you skip."

"Yes," the soprano answered, exasperated that that was what everyone asked him lately. "I just have a lot to study to do, so I need to get home early."

"Oh, ok then, sure. We're just going to rehearse today. Which reminds me, did Mercedes or Rachel told you about this week assignment?" Kurt shook his head. "This time it's easy," Sam picked up the test-tube once again and started to fill it with what the other boy started passing him. "You need to think about what you're feeling right now and sing a song about it," he shrugged. "Mr. Shue said that we have to pay attention to the lyrics more than the words."

"Oh," was all Kurt was able to say. He was feeling so fragile these days that the last thing he needed was to have to sing about his emotional state. "Exactly what I need," he mumbled turning his attention back to his book.

Sam glanced at him from the corner of his eye; he had been studying Kurt for quite a while now and was able to pick on something being wrong right away and this looked like the perfect chance to have the guy opening up to him. However, Kurt looked so tired and sad that Sam didn't really want to take advantage of that to get to know the boy better. Sighing, he decided to keep on a steady chat to help the soprano to keep his mind away from whatever was bothering him.

"So, why did you ask me to talk with Mr. Shue? Is something wrong with Mercedes?"

Kurt shrugged but still wouldn't look up from the book. "She might not talk to me now."

"Oh, she was so angry on Friday because Rachel knew where you were and she didn't."

"Yes and then I turned my phone off for all the week-end and I was late at school today so I still have to talk to her."

"Good luck, then, man," Sam said chuckling and patting Kurt on his shoulder.

"Thanks," replied the other teen with a smile and an eye-roll.

*GLEE*

Kurt didn't run into Mercedes until lunch where he sat down with all the other glee members so she couldn't yell at him too much.

He took an apple and a bottle of water like he did on Friday (because apples were among the few things that didn't make him sick) and headed to the glee table were Rachel, Finn, Artie, Tina, Quinn and Puck were sitting.

Rachel was just finishing telling Finn that she wouldn't have been able to make it to glee that afternoon when Kurt sat down between Puck and Tina since it was the only empty sit at the table.

"Hey, Kurt," Tina greeted him with one of her big smiles.

"Hey, girl," He greeted her back. Puck, instead, ignored him as usual but Kurt could feel the football player's eyes on him. He turned around to face him, but Puck quickly looked away. Sighing, Kurt took a bite from his apple.

"That's all you're going to eat?" Quinn asked and the attention of everyone at the table was immediately on him; even Puck's.

"Yeah, I'm not really hungry."

"But you're already so skinny," Finn said.

Kurt shrugged feeling that if they didn't stop staring at him, he'd lose his appetite. He was about to ask what was so fascinating in watching him eating when someone slapped him behind the head.

"What..." he trailed off when he saw Mercedes glaring at him.

"What the hell happened to you? I've been calling you since Friday," she pushed Rachel a little to the side so she could sit down between her and Tina and faced Kurt. "Why have you been avoiding me?"

_'So, I wasn't the only one_,' Puck thought, arching an eyebrow. It was unusual and Kurt and Mercedes would fight.

"I kept the phone turned off," Kurt said shrugging and putting his apple down on the tray thinking that he should really force himself to eat something sooner or later before he collapsed.

"All week-end?" Mercedes asked impatiently. "All I had for worrying about you, was a text saying that everything was ok."

"Because everything is ok." Kurt looked straight into his best friend's eyes. "I just didn't want to talk to anyone."

"Boy I..."

"So, Kurt, do you have something exciting to share?" Rachel butted in with a big smile on her face trying to stir the conversation away from Kurt.

The soprano turned to look at her bewildered. "Hmm..."

"You know, have you met anyone during the summer?"

Quinn laughed. "Rachel, it's November, you should have asked him right after we came back to school."

The cheerleader and the singer started arguing and Finn had to calm them down, but all that seemed to distract Mercedes long enough for her to start eating her lunch. Kurt got up grabbing his tray with his half touched apple and started walking away.

"Where are you going?" Artie asked. Everyone stopped talking but all Kurt did was shrug saying that he had to go to the bathroom and then left feeling Puck's eyes on his back.

The soprano sighed and almost turned around to ask the running back why he kept looking at him when it was clear that he didn't care about him. Frustrated and actually feeling a little nauseous, Kurt threw away the half eaten apple, slid the bottle of water in his bag and put away his tray before walking out of the cafeteria heading towards the bathroom.

Puck watched him go, he couldn't help it even though he knew that if anyone at the table picked up on it, there would have been way too many question for his liking.

"I'm worried about him," Tina said, catching his attention and making him turn around. Noah saw everyone nodding at the table.

"He just doesn't look like himself anymore," Quinn said sadly.

"And he's getting skinnier," Finn added.

"Maybe he just needs some time for himself," Rachel said, trying her best to stir the conversation away from her friend. "I'm sure it's nothing serious. Why don't we discuss sectionals?" She smiled brightly.

Mercedes rolled her eyes and Quinn got up from the table. "I'll go find Brittany and Santana" she said, before leaving.

Soon everyone started talking about their own stuff, Kurt away from their thoughts, everyone except for Puck who glanced once again towards the door through where his lover had left. Without saying anything, he got up and went in search of his boy.

Sometimes, Noah would think about what would happen if anyone knew about them, and sometimes he didn't care at all, usually the not-caring-about-it times were when he was buried inside Kurt or had his arms around him, or was simply kissing the boy, and this was why he felt split into; the guy that was a caring boyfriend and the jerk that put the guy he cared about into a dumpster everyday; he felt like a coward for not being able to just don't care about what others might do or say.

When he finally reached the door to the bathroom, he hesitated for a moment before pushing the door and walking inside. He found Kurt in front of the sinks watching himself in the mirror.

"Hey," The pale boy greeted him shyly.

"You keep acting strange," Noah said back, walking until he was standing behind Kurt. He hesitated only a moment before sliding his arms around the slim waist of his lover pulling him up against his chest. He leaned his chin on the boy's shoulder and watched them in the mirror.

"You keep acting as if you have multiple personality disorder," Kurt retorted back. Puck chuckled before leaving a soft kiss on his neck. "Aren't you afraid that someone is in the stalls and might see you?"

"If there was someone you would have told me," Puck simply stated.

"What if someone walks inside, huh? Are you going to hit me and pretend that I hit on you?" Kurt's voice was ice cold and stopped the smile that was forming on his lover's lips.

Noah thought that the soprano was joking so he started to smile only to stop when he heard the tone in his voice. "Jesus, what's wrong with you lately? Are you having PMS?"

Kurt glared at him, or well, at his reflection. "Can you not be an asshole for a minute?"

Puck pulled away and walked over to the door locking it. Then, he turned around leaning against it and faced his lover. "Why didn't you call me back all week-end?"

"God, you sound like Mercedes," Kurt replied, turning around and crossing his arms in front of his chest. His eyes locked with Noah's. "Why did you leave before I woke up the other night?"

"Your dad might have walked in and..."

"You know that I lock the door."

"I... you know that I never stay to sleep."

"You came in the middle of the night, you could have stayed for six hours," Kurt hissed._ God, I hate how I can't keep my damn emotions in check_, he thought.

"You're not eating enough," Puck said and Kurt really wanted to punch him in that moment thinking, _Of course he would go and change the subject_.

"I had a big breakfast this morning, happy?" He walked closer to the jock and glared up at him.

"Would you mind letting me out, now?"

"You're being a bitch and I don't even know why."

"Do you even care?" Kurt asked. "You always say that it's only about sex, so why do you ask?"

Puck narrowed his eyes. "I don't get it, Hummel. I don't get_ you_. One moment we're fucking and everything is perfect and the next one, you're acting like a crazy bitch."

_Everything is perfect for you, Noah, not for me_, Kurt thought, lowering his gaze. _It's all my fault really, I shouldn't put up with all this. It's just that..._ "I have to go now," He said quietly. He felt Noah take a step away from the door and wished for a second that the boy would hug him. Then the moment was gone and Puck was stepping aside unlocking the door and gesturing for Kurt to go.

"What's happening?" Puck tried one last time. Then, before Kurt could try to say anything, the door opened and one of the football players walked inside. He looked between Noah and Kurt and snickered.

"The fairy hitting on you?"

Puck glanced at Kurt before smirking at his teammate. "You know it, I'm Puckzilla. I'm irresistible." The other jock walked inside one of the stall shaking his head still chuckling and Noah locked eyes with his lover that simply shook his head in defeat and walked out of the bathroom without another word.

There were times when they both feel like one was pulling and the other was pushing.

*GLEE*

Luckily, Kurt had a free period after lunch so he spent it in on the bleachers of the football field where he knew that he could be alone. He was feeling weird; his emotions were all over the place, he felt nauseous and tired most of the time and he had headaches more frequently than he could ever remember having. He mentally told himself to be sure to say everything to doctor Anderson later.

Deciding to spend the free time relaxing, he took his iPod out of his bag and started going through his songs looking for one he could choose for glee. However, he was feeling so many things at the same time that he couldn't focus on just one feeling that he could sing about. In the end, he put the iPod away and took out the last issue of Vogue French and spent the rest of the hour reading through it.

When it was finally time to get back inside, he was happy to only have two more hours before being finally free.

On his way to history, he ran into Mercedes; they looked at each other but in the end, the girl shook her head and left.

Kurt, feeling ready to punch something, walked over to his class and then spent history and art sulking without really paying attention to what was happening. When the last bell finally rang, he packed his belonging and went to wait in his car for Rachel; he had to wait for fifteen minutes before the girl finally climbed in the passenger side of his Navigator.

"I'm sorry but Finn saw me leaving and wanted to talk to me."

"Talk, huh?" Kurt asked sarcastically while he started to drive away from the school. He turned on the radio so they wouldn't have to talk and they were both fine with simply singing along with the radio from time to time.

When they finally reached the clinic, Rachel glanced at Kurt just as he was turning the radio off.

"Are you worried?"

Kurt looked out of the window and simply nodded before getting out of the car.

"It's going to be okay," The girl told him, while they walked inside the clinic.

"We don't even know what's wrong and we won't know for at least a couple of days."

"Yes, but no matter what the outcome will be, you're going to be okay." The steadiness in her voice gave Kurt courage and somehow made that awkwardness between them lessen a little.

They had to wait half an hour before the receptionist came over to tell Kurt that he could go inside.

"You coming?" He asked to Rachel. The girl nodded before following him inside.

"Hello, Kurt," The old man sat behind the desk in the little studio said as soon as the two teens stepped inside.

"Doctor Anderson," he greeted back, closing the door. "This is my friend Rachel Berry," he added, waving towards Rachel. The girl and the doctor shook hands and then they all sat down.

"So, you told me that you feel dizzy, nauseous, tired and moody." The tone the doctor used unnerved Kurt; it sounded like the man had already figured out what was wrong with him while Kurt, that was feeling everything firsthand, didn't know anything.

"Yes."

"Anything else?"

"He looks paler," said Rachel.

"Yes and you have lost too much weight since I last saw you." He looked at Kurt from behind the rim of his glasses, resembling a parent scowling his child.

"It's because of the nausea," The boy said quickly before lowering his gaze. "Is it what Mom had? Am I going to die?"

The doctor actual chuckled at that, waving his hands up in the air dismissively. "Nonsense. I think to know what's wrong with you and if I'm right, you will have to find a specialist."

"Oh God!" Kurt and Rachel said at the same time.

"Quit worrying. Now, I have to ask you something before telling you what I think it might be going on."

"Ok."

"Are you having sexual intercourse with anyone at the moment or have you recently at least?"

Rachel widened her eyes and looked between the doctor and Kurt. The boy blushed and cleared his throat nervously, suddenly thinking that perhaps, he should have let the girl wait outside. "Y... yes."

"Hmm, just what I thought."

Kurt looked at him in shock. "Do I give some vibe that made you think I wasn't a virgin anymore?"

"Oh, it's because of the symptoms." Now, he looked disappointed. "But I thought that we talked about safe sex."

"Indeed we have. I always made sure that he wore a condom."

"Kurt, one of the times you were with the boy, the condom must have broken."

"Wh..."

"He's pregnant?" Rachel asked in shock and Kurt was happy that he didn't have to voice the question.

"I believe so, yes."

Kurt almost wished to be an enough drama queen to be able to faint because right now, he didn't want to hear anything else.

"However, medicine is a science not a guess, so we will run some tests and by tomorrow, you'll know for sure."

"Oh, God!" Kurt took a deep breath trying to calm himself down. "Dad doesn't even know that I'm seeing someone."

"Do I know him?" Rachel asked in a whisper.

Doctor Anderson looked between the two teens somewhat amused.

"I..." Kurt looked at the girl. "No," he said quickly before diverting his gaze away. _He's going to kill me if I tell anyone... oh God_; he thought silently panicking.

"Kurt?" the doctor calling his name shook the soprano out of his thoughts. "Are you ready? I might be wrong anyway."

"Yeah, of course." He got up and pulled off his jacket while thinking back about all the times he had slept with Puck; he had always made sure that they boy wore a condom and the only time they had been too drunk to care, had been four months ago and if that had been when they had conceived the baby, he would be showing now. '_No, it can't be that time_', he thought. '_The condom must have broke during some other time_.' Kurt tried to remind himself not to panic while the doctor started to take samples of his blood.

After Dr. Anderson finished visiting him, he told Kurt that he'd call him the next day with the results and then he and Rachel left. The drive over to the Berry's was awkward: Kurt was simply staring ahead, his hands clenching and unclenching around the steering wheel; Rachel kept on glancing at him worriedly.

When they finally arrived to their destination, they sat in the car in silence. Finally, Rachel turned to face Kurt. "If you're pregnant, are you planning on keeping the baby?"

"I'd never kill anyone or give away my own flesh and blood," he answered right away, because really, it was the baby he had created with the man he loved and he'd never give that up.

Rachel nodded. "It's the right choice." She kept quit for a few moments before asking something else. "Do you know how your boyfriend will react?"

"He's not my boyfriend," Kurt said with a sigh. He leaned his forehead against the head rest. "We just fuck." He glanced sideways at the girl. "And I can't believe you're the first one I've ever told about him." He narrowed his eyes a little. "Maybe it makes sense."

Rachel chose to ignore the last part of the boy's speech focusing only on the nature of his relationship with this mysterious boy. "Are you going to tell him?"

"He wouldn't want to know." Kurt laughed humorlessly. "He goes out of his way to avoid me when we're not alone and fucks everyone that will look at him twice and now I'm stuck with his kid for the rest of my life." He closed his eyes before adding. "If I'm pregnant anyway." '_I'm overreacting_,' he told himself frowning.

"So you're not going to tell him?"

"No."

"Is it right?" Rachel started to fidget with the hem of her skirt and lowered her gaze. "I mean, maybe if he knew about the baby he'd change his mind about your relationship."

"I don't really think so, Rachel."

They let the silence fill the car. Kurt was thinking about Puck, a little kid that would look a little like them... and Rachel was thinking about a way to help her friend.

'_Well, there's something I can do_,' she mused. "Listen, your doctor said that if you're pregnant then you will need to see a specialist and one of my dads is an andrologist."

Kurt turned around to face her. "Is he Jewish?" he cursed himself as soon as the words had left his mouth. '_Now she'll get what's going on_.'

"Of course, why are you..." she trailed off for a moment before laughing. "I forgot for a moment that you said I didn't know the baby's daddy and I thought it was Puck."

The boy was so happy that she didn't understand. He was getting so fed up with all the lies he had to say because of Noah.

"So, the baby daddy is Jew?"

"Yes."

Rachel frowned. "Does he go to another school?"

Lies, lies, lies... i'_so fucking tired'_./i "It's Puck," He blurted out before he could stop himself. "If I'm pregnant, the baby is Puck's." Kurt's voice was nothing more than a whisper but Rachel heard him nonetheless and her eyes widened in shock. The soprano chuckled. "Yes, Puckzilla knocked up the resident fairy."

"Oh, Kurt..." In the girl's voice there was that kindness that he had seen in her eyes after the makeover that he had sabotaged. Kurt felt so stupid in that moment sharing everything with Rachel thinking that he had hooked up with Puck because he was the closest he could ever get to actually be with Finn and all he had got out of it, was a broken heart and possibly an unborn child. He briefly wondered what had been Noah's excuse to fuck him that first night.

"Don't tell anyone, ok?" Kurt asked quietly after a while.

"Sure. I can keep a secret you know. But I really think you should tell Puck."

"I'll think about it," He relented because he was feeling tired again and didn't want to keep having to talk about it.

Rachel opened the passenger door and looked back at Kurt. "Let me know if you'll need to see my father."

"Ok, and thank you, Rachel, for everything."

The girl simply nodded with a smile before running inside her house. She wondered what would happen to her relationship with Finn when the boy would eventually find out the truth and that they had both kept it hidden from him. But she had promised and she was going to keep her mouth shut for Kurt.

* * *

**A/N**_: Thank you so much for all the reviews! I've already sent the next chapter to my beta but I don't know when I'll be able to update since I'm moving away so I'll be without internet for an unknown amount of time! Since I'm currently using my neighbor__'s Internet connection, I can't reply to all the amazing reviews but just know that I'm very very grateful for all of them!_


	4. Confirmations

**Chapter 3 - Confirmations**

_All he could think about  
was I'm too young for this.  
Got my whole life ahead.  
Hell I'm just a kid myself.  
How'm I gonna raise one._

Defying Gravity was playing softly in the back ground and Kurt was lying on his bed wearing a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt; his main aim was to relax a bit, so after he had come home from his doctors appointment, he had taken a long shower and was now trying to let go of all the stress.

"Kurt?"

Burt's voice coming from the last step of the stairs leading down into the basement shook Kurt out of his thoughts. The boy sat up in the bed and looked at his father. "Dad, you scared me."

"Sorry," the man shrugged and walked over to his son. He sat down on the edge of the bed and looked at Kurt. "I called Carole and we're going out. Is that ok with you?"

"Sure," the soprano smiled sincerely at his father. _Just because my personal life sucks, doesn't mean he has to be miserable too_.' "I'll just watch a movie or something."

"Yeah about that," Burt scratched the back of his neck nervously. "I kind of… asked Carole to let Finn come over."

"Dad!" Kurt said, getting up from the bed. He stood in front of his dad with his hands on his waist. "I can look after myself, thank you very much."

"It's not that, son." Burt sighed. "Look, I've been seeing Carole for sometime now and I'm not gonna lie to you, it's serious." He trailed off when he saw Kurt lowering his gaze. "Kurt..."

"It's ok." The boy turned his back to the older Hummel and walked over to his vanity starting to re-arrange all his products.

"I thought I told you to stop shutting me out."

"You deserve someone. I've been selfish in the past. First, I set you up with her because of my crush on Finn and then I told you to break up with her because I was jealous. I should really start to consider other people's happiness. It's just that..."

"You miss your mother."

Kurt shrugged and Burt got up from the bed and walked over to his son. He put a comforting hand on his shoulder and squeezed it. "I know that you miss her, son, its normal and I miss her too. Everyday. But it's been eight years and we should try to find some happiness."

"Carole is great," Kurt said, locking his gaze with his father in the mirror. "I..." he smiled a little. "I can see us being with her and maybe Finn could be a good stepbrother."

Burt chuckled. "He's a good guy."

"Yeah."

"So… you ok?"

"Yes, Dad. Go out, have some fun, do something I'll never do and you know, just be happy," he said with a little shrug. "And Finn can come over, if he's ok with it."

"Sure he is. I think he had something with that Puckerman kid, but Finn said something about our television and a video game."

"Great," Kurt said sarcastically. Burt squeezed his shoulder once again before leaving the room to go get ready for his date.

Kurt took his phone out of his school bag and quickly typed a message to Finn. '_I'll let you use my big screen if you bring me ice-cream._' He hit send and then walked over to his closet. He stood in front of it for a few minutes deciding on what to wear before reminding himself that he didn't have a crush on the ex-quarterback anymore and if they were going to end up living together again, he should feel comfortable enough around the boy to wear just sweatpants and a t-shirt.

He heard his phone beeping and went to read Finn's answer. As soon as he read the message he groaned.

'_Ok. I'll bring gallons of it so you'll forgive me for bringing Puck along. Sorry, I couldn't ditch him._'

It was a little over an hour later when Kurt was watching a re-run of Project Runway, that the doorbell rang. "DAD!" he yelled towards the stairs that took up to his parent's bedroom.

"CAN YOU GET THAT?" Burt yelled back from his room.

Rolling his eyes, Kurt got up from the sofa and walked over to the door pulling it open with a smile. "Hey, Carole." He greeted the woman before hugging her. "Dad's upstairs," he rolled his eyes fondly. "He's kind of nervous."

Carole laughed. "You'd think it's the first time we're going out." She turned around towards her car and yelled, just like a mother could do, "FINN! C'MON!" She headed towards the living room just as two doors of her car opened and closed.

Kurt watched Puck and Finn making their way up his driveway and reminded himself that he should be a polite host despite all the rest and so greeted the two football players with a smile. "Hey, guys." Finn pushed something in his arms.

"Chocolate and vanilla," he said smiling. "And thanks for letting us play."

"You're welcome," he said distractedly while opening the cap of the ice cream can. He slid a finger in the cold cream and then licked it clean. It was only when he was about to dip the finger again that he remembered that Puck was still standing in front of him. Truth to be told, he wasn't expecting that the running back would talk to him. He looked up and arched an eyebrow at the hungry look on the other teen's face. "What? Want some?"

"Depends on what you're offering."

"You and your bad lines," Kurt said chuckling and shaking his head a little, because no matter the fights they could have, he still loved him and Puck wasn't acting like an asshole in that moment, so he told himself that some friendly banter was acceptable. "C'mon," he finally closed the door and turned around to head towards the kitchen. He stopped when he felt his forearm being gently grabbed. He glanced up at Puck.

"Listen, about this morning in the bathroom..."

"I'm sorry if I reacted that way. It's been a bad day and you were actually trying to be nice outside of the bedroom for once," he said the last bit in a whisper. He saw a strange look come over Puck's face and wondered what was going on.

"I was going to say that you were right and that it wasn't my business."

"Oh," Kurt looked into Puck's hazel eyes for a moment before shrugging. "It's ok," he turned around and headed towards the kitchen before Noah could say anything else.

Puck kept his eyes on Kurt for a few moments cursing himself for saying those things; the little smile that had been on his lover's lips when he caught Puck watching him eat the ice cream, had disappeared in a moment.

"Ok, guys," Burt said, finally ready to leave. He looked at Carole and smiled. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you, Burt, you're not bad yourself."

Kurt and Finn rolled their eyes.

"Have a great night," Kurt told to the two adults.

"Yeah," Finn said distractedly while he watched Puck starting to put on the game they were going to play.

Burt and Carole told their sons to behave and that they'd have their phones on in case they needed to contact them and then left.

"I swear, they still see us like babies," Kurt commented, as soon as they had closed the door behind them.

"I know." Finn glanced at the other boy and frowned. "You're going to eat it all?"

Kurt shrugged. "Yes. Wait, do you want some?"

"No, I hate chocolate and vanilla ice cream."

The soprano shrugged and dug his spoon in the iced cream. "There's more for me."

Puck looked between the two teens. "You act like brothers."

"We're supposed to," Finn said. He lifted a hand as to ruffle Kurt's hair but the shorter boy glared at him.

"Don't you dare."

The ex-quarterback rolled his eyes before turning his attention back on his best friend. "All set up?"

"Yeah." Puck sat down on Kurt's left side leaving him between himself and Finn. "Want to play?" he asked.

"Nope. I'll just watch the two of you engage in stupid activities while I eat my ice cream."

"Whatever, Princess," Puck replied with half a smile.

Finn looked away from the television ready to tell his best friend not to call Kurt that, but saw the little smiles on the two teens' faces and frowned. He was feeling once again as if he just couldn't understand something. He shook his head and they started Mario Kart.

"So, today at Glee you were missing again," Finn said. "Were you with Rachel?" he asked.

"Why? Do I look like someone that would spend his free time with her?" Kurt answered while licking the ice cream off of the spoon.

"It's just that she told me that she'd be home but when I called, she wasn't there and Burt told Mom that you haven't been home until later today.

"You checked up on her? What? You thought that she was cheating on you?" Kurt was good at changing the subject when he wanted to and it was easy to distract Finn.

"No, don't tell her that I asked about it," the ex-quarterback said without glancing away from the screen. "She'll think that I don't trust her."

"And you don't?"

"Of course I trust her. I wasn't checking up on her, you know? I only had to ask her if she wanted to rehears with me the song I want to sing on Friday."

"Well, we weren't together." Kurt answered taking another spoon full of ice cream.

"Yeah, thinking about it now, Sam said that you had to study."

"But you weren't at home," Puck stated briefly glancing at his secret lover.

"I was at the library, can you stop with the questions?" he asked to both teens.

"Sorry, Princess," Noah said smirking.

They spend the next two hours talking about the glee club, playing the video game (Kurt even tried one game) and about Burt and Carole dating. It was nearing 11.00 when Puck felt something leaning on his shoulder. He looked down seeing that Kurt had fallen asleep against him. He was starting to smile when he remembered that Finn was in the room with them.

"Do you want me to wake him up?" his best friend asked, pausing the game.

"No, it's ok."

"He looks tired lately," Finn noticed sighing.

"Yeah." He wanted so bad to put his arm around Kurt's shoulders to get him closer, that he had to tighten the hold around the controller he had in his hands to stop himself from reaching out.

"Maybe he should get a boyfriend," the ex-quarterback said after a moment. "You know, someone that will take care of him like Rachel does for me."

Puck scowled. "I don't think it's what he needs right now."

"And what would you know about what he needs?"

"You think you know something? You called the guy a fag and told Sam not to sing with him and suddenly you care?" Puck tried to keep his voice low as not to wake Kurt up.

Finn looked at the boy confused. "How do you know?"

Noah glanced away before putting down the control. He leaned Kurt's head down on the sofa and then got up. "I'm going to go take a beer."

"Puck, wait," Finn got up as well and followed his best friend inside the kitchen. He glanced towards the couch to see if Kurt had woken up. "What's going on?"

"What the hell are you talking about?" he asked, opening the fridge and retrieving a beer that Finn got out of his grasp and put back away.

"You can't drink it, Burt will know and get angry."

"Why would he get angry for a beer? He let Kurt down in the basement with Brittany knowing that they might have..." he trailed off.

"Again, how do you know?" Finn crossed his arms in front of his chest with a determined expression on his face; he wasn't going to let it go until Puck told him what was going on.

Noah shrugged and came up with the first thing he could think of. "I overheard him talking with Aretha."

"Oh, Ok."

Finn looked convinced and Puck breathed out in relief. "So, wanna get back to the game?"

"Hey, guys." They turned around to see Kurt standing in the doorway of the kitchen rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Sorry for falling asleep but I was kind of tired."

Finn smiled. "It's ok."

Puck couldn't stop himself from staring at his lover. He looked like every time he'd stay over at Puck's and fallen asleep only to wake up around midnight remembering that he was supposed to get home. Kurt rubbing his eyes with the hair all tussled, was part of that intimacy that they shared and he was somewhat annoyed that now Finn saw it too. Then, another thought crept in his head. Their parents were going to get married or decide that they will live together again, and then Finn would get to share a room with Kurt and see him getting out of the shower, waking up and falling asleep and having breakfast and...

He felt a hand shaking him and looked up towards Finn. "What?"

"I said, what do you say if we order pizza? Mom and Burt should be home by midnight, so we have time to eat something."

"Yeah, sure."

"Ok, I'm going to the bathroom, you guys go ahead and call."

As soon as Finn had disappeared up the stairs, Puck walked over to Kurt barely giving the boy the time to look confused on what was happening, before backing him up against the nearest wall and starting to kiss him.

Kurt was startled at first but then, caught in the familiarity of the action, he sighed into the kiss and put his hands on Puck's biceps before opening his legs a little so Puck could put his thigh against his crotch. Kurt moaned softly before sliding his hands up Noah's shoulders until they were resting at the base of his shaved head. He felt the prickly skin under his fingertips and pulled away a little. "Are you growing back the mohawk or all your hair?"

"I'm kissing you and you think about my hair, Kurt?" Puck asked, shaking his head fondly.

"Sorry." Kurt slid a hand to cup Noah's cheek before leaning forwards to lay a soft kiss on his lips.

"You're so hot right now," Puck whispered, against Kurt's mouth.

The soprano chuckled. "I'm a mess right now. No tight jeans or combed hair."

"You're so hot right now," the running back repeated. His arms slid around Kurt's slim waist and pulled the boy closer. "I couldn't keep my hands to myself anymore." He leaned in for another kiss this time going deeper, seeking entrance into Kurt's mouth with his tongue and pushing the shorter boy up against the wall so when he pushed a little with his thigh that was still between Kurt's legs, he almost raised him from the ground.

Kurt slid his hand away from Noah's cheek so he could rest it against the boy's neck. He squeezed his eyes shut trying to block out all the thoughts of possibly being pregnant, of Santana and all the other girls, of the hurt he felt every time he couldn't hold his lover's hand while walking down the halls or call Noah his boyfriend, or how he simply was unable to say stop.

He heard footsteps descending the stairs and tried to get his emotions into check and to push back the tears that had gathered in his eyes. Puck let him go quickly and Kurt sighed telling himself that he should stop trying to hope for a change.

"Did you order?" Finn asked, walking inside the kitchen smiling, totally unaware of what he had almost walked in on.

"No, we were deciding on which kind of pizza," Kurt replied, stepping away from the wall hoping that his future step-brother wouldn't ask what he was doing against it. He picked up the phone and looking through the contacts, called the pizza place.

They ate watching TV and discussing glee club and when midnight rolled around and Burt and Carole finally got back, three empty boxes were lying on the coffee table. The woman gave a quick good night to Kurt before rushing Finn and Puck out of the door. Then, Kurt and Burt were left standing alone in the living room.

"You guys had a good night?" the older Hummel asked.

"Yeah, we played games, or at least Puck and Finn did, I watched, ate ice cream and fell asleep," he shrugged. "How was your date?"

Burt smiled widely. "It was pretty amazing."

"I'm happy." He wondered what would happen if it turned out that he was pregnant; if Carole and Finn would leave them, if his father would lose someone that made him so happy.

Lately, he was always so full of questions and no one had the answers he needed.

"Kurt?"

"Huh?"

"I said are you going to bed?" Burt asked.

"Yeah, it's pretty late."

"Ok, good night son." He hugged Kurt and left a kiss on his head before letting him go.

It was hard for him to sleep that night. He kept turning and tossing and when his alarm went off at seven, it felt way too early. He got out of bed and took a shower before choosing what pieces were going to be his outfit for that day. He opted for his black Marc Jacob crew neck sweater and a pair of Levi's skinny jeans. He looked at himself in the mirror and checked his hair before grabbing his bag and getting upstairs.

He was walking inside the kitchen to grab something for breakfast when his phone rang. He froze and took his iPhone from his pocket with shaking hands. He didn't have to look at the screen to know who was calling.

"Hello?" he tried to steady his voice but was pretty sure it was useless.

"Kurt? I'm Dr. Anderson."

"Good morning, doctor." He heard the man on the other end of the line sigh and got ready to hear the news.

"So, I've got your results back and it looks like what we thought."

Kurt glanced behind him to make sure that Burt wasn't coming down, then lowering his voice, he asked, "I'm pregnant?"

"Yes. From the exams, I'd say that you're about nine weeks."

The pale boy leaned his back against the wall and closed his eyes trying to breathe slowly so he wouldn't faint. "You-" he cleared his throat when his voice came out weak. "Are you sure?"

"Positive. Now, like I said, you need to find a specialist. Do you need some names?"

"No, the father of one of my good friends is an andrologist."

"Good, good. You can come by to retrieve your results anytime and you should contact this doctor as soon as you can and also, talk to your father."

"I know," Kurt replied in a whisper. "Thank you, Doctor Anderson."

"You're welcome, son."

Kurt mumbled a good bye and then hung up. "Ok, don't panic, Kurt," he said quietly. He grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and wrote a note for his dad telling him that he had gone to school and then left. He got inside his SUV and took out his phone calling Rachel.

"Kurt?" she asked, picking up.

"My doctor just called and...and…"

"Oh God!" she exclaimed almost as hysterical as Kurt was feeling. "You're pregnant, aren't you?"

"Yes."

"I... congratulations?"

"Congr... I'm in the middle of having a breakdown, Rachel!"

"No!" she said quickly. "You need to calm down. I don't have the necessary control over my emotions to handle all this if you freak out."

Kurt took a deep breath and told himself to get a grip. "I need to see your dad."

"Of course. You have an appointment with him tomorrow."

He frowned. "How is that even possible?"

"Well, your doctor seemed pretty sure."

The boy sighed. "Thank you, Rachel."

"You're welcome." She paused for a moment as if thinking of something. Finally, she asked, "Are you on your way to school?"

"I'm leaving home right now."

"Ok. When you get there, wait in your car, ok?"

Kurt frowned. "Why?"

"You shouldn't get thrown into dumpsters while you're pregnant."

"And what are you going to do about it?"

"Finn is going to come pick me up. I'll get him to stop the jocks, don't worry."

"He wasn't able to stop them until now and besides, he will ask why." The problem wasn't that he didn't want for his future step-brother to find out, but that until he talked with his father, he didn't want to tell anyone else.

"Don't worry," Rachel's voice pulled him out of his thoughts. "I will come up with something and he'll do it."

"Of course," he said, rolling his eyes. "I'll see you later, then."

"Sure."

They hung up and Kurt put the car in gear and drove to school. When he got to the McKinley high, he parked as close to the entrance as he could, but still waited for Rachel and Finn. He put a hand on his flat stomach and sighed. "I'm not taking any chances," he whispered in the silence filling the car.

He was startled by a knock on the window. He turned around finding Finn looking at him confused. Kurt picked up his bag and got out his Navigator locking it behind him. "Hey, Finn."

"Hey, Kurt. So, Rachel told me that I had to make sure you won't be hit, throw into a dumpster or anything else and then she disappeared. She said that I had to do it until further notice."

"Thank you for agreeing."

Finn shrugged. "It's the least I can do. I should have stopped then a long time ago and now that Mom and Burt are serious, I should act like a better brother for you."

Kurt smiled up at the taller teen while they walked towards the entrance. "They're not married yet."

"I know, but I think that your Dad expects me to protect you since I'm bigger and I have a lot of making up to do."

"Well... thank you, Finn."

"Are you going to tell me what's wrong? Why I need to protect you all of a sudden?" the taller teen asked him, thinking back at when Rachel had told him.

"Yes, I will tell you, just not right now," the soprano replied truthfully.

"Ok."

They were near the dumpster when Azimio started laughing at them. "Hey, Hudson, you finally saw reason? It's very sweet of you to bring Hummel to us."

"Actually," he stepped in front of Kurt. "I'm making sure that you guys don't do anything."

"Why should we listen to you?" another football player asked.

"You don't have to listen to me, but maybe you're forgetting that Kurt is a cheerleader and he could always go to Sue. He won her the National title and I'm sure that all it would take is one word from Kurt and coach Sylvester would go after everyone of you."

The jocks looked between themselves and then hurried inside the school (no one crossed Sue Sylvester after all) leaving only Puck, Finn and Kurt standing near the dumpster.

"That was awesome, Finn," Kurt said in awe.

The taller teen laughed, both boys unaware of Noah's glare. "Rachel wrote down the speech and I had to memorize it."

"Well, thank you."

Finn smiled blushing before sliding an arm around Kurt's shoulders starting to lead him inside the school.

Puck watched them go wondering what the hell had just happened.

*GLEE*

After Finn had left Kurt outside of his class, he went in search of Rachel to tell her that the mission had been accomplished, but on his way over he ran into Puck.

"Hey, man."

"What the hell are you doing?" Puck asked, completely ignoring his best friend's greeting.

"What are you talking about?"

"Now you're back at being his knight in shiny armor?"

"You mean, Kurt? You're angry because I helped him?" Finn asked, confused. He narrowed his eyes and said, "Dude, our parents are getting married, I have to act like a big brother, it's about time."

"He had a crush on you until a few months ago, and..."

"This has got nothing to do with it, ok? Rachel asked me to look out for him."

Puck frowned in confusion. Last time he checked, Kurt and Rachel weren't even friends and now she was asking Finn to look out for him? "Why would she do that?"

Finn shrugged. "She said that I had to since he was going to be my brother and because it's wrong to bully someone and since I want to be a leader, I should start acting like it."

That was the most stupid explanation Puck had ever heard. He was about to ask Finn if he really believed all that bullshit when Rachel came up to them. She entwined her fingers through Finn's and the taller teen looked down at her as if he was seeing the most beautiful thing in the world.

Puck rolled his eyes. "You two are sickening."

Rachel looked between him and her boyfriend. "Were you having an argument?"

"Puck was wondering why I stopped the guys from throwing Kurt into the dumpster."

"Because it's wrong and because..."

"Yeah, I've heard it already," Puck cut her off. He looked at the couple for a moment before shaking his head and leaving.

"So, why the secret?" Finn asked, tugging on Rachel's hand to get her attention. "I know it's not just because of our parents; Kurt told me that I had to wait."

"Then you should listen to him." Rachel got up on her tiptoes and left a kiss on her boyfriend cheek while her eyes were still fixed on Puck. She sighed, wondering if there was a way to help Kurt out without giving away his secret. It was the first time ever that someone trusted her with something and she wasn't going to let Kurt down. "I'll see you later," she said quietly to Finn before leaving him standing in the halls.

*GLEE*

Kurt's first period was English and, as usual, he sat down next to Sam. He greeted the quarterback with a smile and a little wave of his fingers.

"Hey, Kurt."

"Hey."

The two teens sat in silence while they took out their books, pens and notepads, then Sam cleared his throat to get Kurt's attention and looked over at him. "So, did you find a song for glee?"

"I think so. I heard a song on the radio while I was coming to school today and I think I'll sing that one. What about you?"

The football player blushed and diverted his gaze; his blond locks fell into his eyes. "Yeah, I found something too."

Kurt smiled softly at him "I can't wait to hear it."

"So you're going to be at glee on Friday?"

"Yep. I don't think that Mr. Shue would let me skip again."

"You don't need to rehearse very much, anyway. I mean, you're great," Sam looked straight at Kurt while saying that. "When you sang that song from Vicky."

"Victor/Victoria."

"Yeah, it was pretty amazing."

This time, it was Kurt's turn to blush. "Thank you, Sam."

"I'm just telling the truth," the quarterback said with a shrug.

The teacher entered the class and they started paying attention. English was Kurt's favorite subject after French. He loved to read and lose himself in someone else's story that would let him go away from that town that was too small for him, too much narrow minded to accept him.

That day, they were reading 'A Tale of Two Cities', one of Kurt's favorite books and he was so engrossed into it, that he didn't notice Sam glancing at him from time to time even daring to stare openly at him for a few minutes just watching how Kurt's eyes moved over the pages or the little smile that would form on his lips while reading one of his favorites parts.

The quarterback could still recall when he had first seen Kurt in the school courtyard on the first day of school. He had been awed. Then, when the soprano had cornered him in the shower to tell him that he wasn't going to sing with him anymore, he had been disappointed. He had been honest in telling Finn that keeping a promise mattered to him way more than being popular.

Now, three months into the school year, he was pretty sure to be in love with Kurt or at least, he was getting there fast; he had never been in love before, so he wasn't totally sure how one was supposed to feel. But still, every time he heard Kurt singing or laughing with Mercedes with his eyes all sparkling, he felt his heart flutter a little. Even when they had football games and Kurt would be cheering the team from the side of the field, he would get a little distracted and had to remind himself that he had to focus.

The class went by quickly, and when the bell rang, Sam was disappointed because he'd have to wait until lunch to see Kurt again.

The two boys got up from their desks and together walked out of the classroom. Leaning against the wall was Finn. He waved at Kurt and started to walk next to him.

"What are you doing here?" the soprano asked.

"Rachel told me..."

"You don't have to escort me around school, Finn," Kurt cut him off huffing. "It's not necessary."

"But she said..."

"Never mind what she said, I can take care of myself. She's being a little paranoid, that's all."

Sam looked between Finn and Kurt wondering what was going on and why Kurt suddenly needed an escort.

"Kurt, just let me walk you to your next class so she won't get mad at me."

"Finn..."

"My class is in the same hall," butted in Sam. "I can walk with you... I mean... if you want to, you know?" he shrugged a little fixing his eyes into Kurt's who smiled at him gratefully.

"That would be great, thank you, Sam." He looked at Finn and sighed. "Tell Rachel that she's overreacting. I'll see you at lunch." Then, without waiting for a reply, he and Sam started to walk down the hall.

"Why did Rachel ask Finn to escort you to class?" the blond quarterback inquired while they walked.

"She thinks that with Finn around, Karofsky and Azimio will stop tormenting me. And our parents are probably getting married, so she told him that it's about time he started acting like a brother."

Sam nodded understanding. "I guess that makes sense."

"Yeah, I just..." Kurt trailed off shrugging. "I don't know, I don't want to have to walk around with a bodyguard."

"Maybe you should get a boyfriend," Sam blurted out. His eyes widened and when he dared to glance at Kurt, he found the same expression on the other boy's face. "I..." He trailed off, scratching the back of his neck nervously and choosing to shut up and divert his gaze.

Kurt cleared his throat a little and smiled softly at the jock. "You know, I don't think I've ever thanked you for acting like you're ok with me being gay even after you know, I cornered you in the shower and after I freaked you out the first time I've ever talked to you," he chuckled. "Sometimes, I'm way too straightforward."

Sam looked at the other boy sure that maybe that was going to be the perfect chance to come clean about his feelings. Taking a deep breath, he opened his mouth and said, "Kurt, I..." but the bell chose that moment to ring. He looked down defeated.

"I'll talk to you later," Kurt told him, smiling apologetically before scurrying inside his class.

The quarterback sighed frustrated. "Damn it," he whispered harshly to himself before hurrying up to his own class.

*GLEE*

When Kurt got home later that afternoon, he did his homework, worked on the song for glee and made dinner. By the time seven rolled around and Burt walked through the door, the young soprano had already decided that he was going to tell the truth to his father hoping that it wasn't going to give the man a heart attack.

Burt was in a good mood that evening; he got home from a profitable day in the Hummel's Tires shop, kissed his son on the forehead as soon as he had seen the boy, called Carole and organized a family-dinner for that Saturday. When he finally sat down at the table to eat, he was positively feeling giddy.

Looking over at Kurt, the older Hummel inquired, "So, how was school today?"

Kurt shrugged before putting down his fork and pushing away his barely touched dinner. He was determined to just tell the truth like when he had finally confessed to his father that he was gay. Taking a deep breath, he looked over at Brut and said, "Dad?"

The man arched an eyebrow at the serious tone of his kid. "What is it, son?"

"You asked me to come talk to you when I had everything sorted out."

The mechanic nodded before putting down his fork and turning off the television. Then, he focused his attention back to his son. "I'm listening."

Kurt took another deep breath and began. "I started seeing a boy back in July. I was pretty sure that he was straight but then he told me that he liked me and we started fooling around. It was never something serious because I thought I was in love with someone else and he..." Kurt trailed off.

"Well, he's not the relationship type of guy but we were feeling lonely and we were there for each other so after a while…," his voice swayed and he had to lower his gaze before continuing. "We started sleeping together. I'm... I'm fairly sure I've been in love with him for a while now, but, and that's why I've been acting strange and feeling a little depressed, he doesn't feel the same way and no one really knows about us because he doesn't want people finding out about us being together. Since he doesn't love me and I'm sure he's ashamed of what we do, I'm not going to tell him… what I'm about to tell you."

Kurt looked up at his father then, only realizing in that moment that he had started crying while talking about Noah. "I'm pregnant and I won't tell him the baby is his because he wouldn't care anyway, and..." a sob broke his voice and he couldn't help but lower his head in shame. "I'm so sorry, Dad. I always made sure that we were safe but one... one of the ti-times, the con-condom..."

"Shh," Burt's voice, fatherly and soothingly, sounded closer than to than he had expected and when his dad's strong arms pulled him into a hug, he let go of all the things he had been bottling up inside.

Burt closed his eyes against his own tears, there was going to be time later to let his emotions overtaking him, but now, he needed to be strong for his son. "Kurt?" he quietly called after a few minutes. "Kurt, son?"

Slowly, the boy pulled away and started to wipe away the tears with his napkin; he still couldn't look Burt in the eyes.

"Kurt, are you sure?"

"I went to see doc-doctor Anderson yesterday," he said, between hiccups. "He said that I should see a sp-specialist and I have an app-appointment with Rachel's father tomorrow afternoon."

"Ok, that's good. You did good," Burt reassured his son before hugging him again. "We need to talk this over, though. Consider all the options and..."

"I want to keep it, Dad." Kurt's voice was suddenly stronger than it had been in the last few minutes.

"I wouldn't expect any less from you, Kurt." Burt stepped back and pulled a chair in front of the crying boy before sighing heavily. "I wasn't even ready to talk about boys yet and now..."

"I'm so sorry, Dad," Kurt started crying again. "So sorry."

"Hey, you need to calm down." The man put a hand on his son's shoulder and squeezed it gently. "I'll be with you every step of the way and so will Carole and Finn."

"What if they don't want to be around me?"

"They love you, Kurt, just like I love you and no matter what, always remember that you come first, ok?"

The pale boy simply nodded. "You're not going to throw me out or anything?"

"I'd never do something like that. I won't lie and say that this is great because honestly, I'm afraid that now you won't get the chance to go away and make a life for yourself, the life that you always wanted and you're not even seventeen yet, so it's going to be hard, but, I would never kick you out, ok? Your mother was very young when we had you and we did a pretty amazing job raising you so I trust you to make the right decision." Burt smiled softly at the boy before taking him back in his arms. After several minutes spent in silence, the eldest Hummel said, "What you said about…about the baby's father, are you sure?"

"We were..." Kurt trailed off clearing his throat a little. "We were never serious. It was just... just sex."

Brut looked away feeling uncomfortable. "Ok. Who is this boy?"

"I can't tell you."

"Why?"

"I just can't, Dad." Kurt stood up and started taking his plate back to the kitchen to put his untouched food in the fridge. Burt quickly followed him. "Rachel is the only one that knows who he is and I wasn't even going to tell her, but she was there and I was breaking down and I had to tell someone. But I won't tell anyone else." He sighed heavily. "I can't out him or anything. Besides, she told Finn to take care of me at school and I can trust her but..."

"You don't trust your family?" Burt asked, bewildered and a little angry.

"It's not that," Kurt said, turning around to face his father. "I don't trust you to not find him and beat him or something."

"I..."

"I know that I have no right to ask for anything, but Dad, please, don't ask me to tell you who the father is."

"I guess I can't force it out of you," the man said with a tired sigh. Kurt nodded and started washing the dishes. "But Saturday we have a family-dinner with Carole and Finn and you're going to tell them that you're pregnant, ok? You won't have to tell them anything more than what you told me, but it has to come from you."

"Ok," Kurt said in a whisper. He could feel a lump forming in his throat at the thought of having to tell Finn. He wanted to, but he was afraid of how the boy would react to the news. He felt strong hands pulling him out of the water and turned around to face his father.

"Go to bed. You look tired and I guess now that I know why, I will have to make sure that you take care of yourself even more than in the past."

Kurt hugged his dad tightly. "Thank you, Dad."

"Thank you for telling me the truth kid."

The pale boy kissed his father goodnight and then went down in his basement. He skipped his nightly moisturizing routine, simply changing into his pajamas before going to the bathroom and slipping under the covers of his bed. He spent a lot of time just gazing up at the ceiling unable to fall asleep. It was hours before his eyes finally closed.

* * *

_I just wanted to thanks everyone for all the great comments! _


	5. Song Sung Blue

**A/N**: I only put Kurt's lyrics in the chapter but I left the title of Puck's and Sam's song, if you're wondering what they are singing about, you know what to google. Also, when I decided that Rachel was going to sing that song, I didn't know that she was going to sing it on the show. Now it will look like I took the song from the episode, while I chose it just because it reminds me of Kurt every time I hear it.

* * *

**Chapter 4 - Song Sung Blue**  
_Me and you are subject to the blues now and then_  
_ But when you take the blues and make a song_  
_ You sing them out again_  
_ Sing them out again_

Kurt adjusted the strap of his shoulder bag and started walking towards the school entrance. He glanced towards the dumpster but Puck and the rest of the football team seemed preoccupied with throwing Jacob inside. Letting out a breath of relief, he kept walking lifting his head a little.

Mercedes waved at him while she crossed the parking lot with Tina and Artie. Sam was following close behind them. Kurt approached them and cheerfully said, "Morning guys."

"Hey Kurt," they all greeted him.

Rachel and Finn caught up with them; the singer kept glancing at Kurt and the soprano had to roll his eyes at her while the quarterback, always the oblivious one, simply waved at him before starting to chat with Sam.

As soon as they stepped inside the school building, Rachel, Finn, Artie, Sam and Tina headed towards their lockers while Mercedes walked with Kurt to theirs.

"So, white boy, how are you today?" the girl asked, while getting her books out of the locker.

"Today is a good day," the Kurt answered noncommittally. He glanced at her. "Look, I'm sorry I've been an awful friend lately."

Mercedes closed her locker and turned her attention to him. "You may not talk to me, but I see that something is wrong. Everyone is worried about you, you know? But I'll be here whenever you want to talk."

Kurt smiled sincerely. "Thank you, 'Cedes."

"Listen, I was wondering if you wanted to come over after school. We could watch a movie, gossip, do our nails and all that stuff so we could catch up a little."

The soprano sighed closing his locker and looking down at Mercedes. "I can't. I have something to do with my Dad."

"Oh," the diva tried to hide her disappointment. "We almost never hang out together anymore."

"I know I'm sorry. This Saturday I have a family dinner with Finn and Carole, but maybe next week-end we could have a sleepover. "

That seemed to put Mercedes into a good mood. She smiled brightly at her best friend, linking arms with him as they made their way towards the first class of the school day. "Maybe we could have a glee sleepover."

"Right. Great," he said, while thinking bitterly, '_Just what I need__ed._' "I'll see you later, then." He waved at his best friend stepping inside his history class.

*GLEE*

Puck's lips were sucking on Santana's collarbone and his hands were under her skirt. He was trying really hard not to let his mind wander to the last time he had been with Kurt inside this same closet, but was finding the action harder than he expected.

The brunette Cheerio huffed impatiently and pushed the running back away. Putting her hands on her hips, she glared up at him. "What the hell is your problem?"

"What…"

Santana glanced down towards the boy's crotch and arched an eyebrow. "We've been making out for ten minutes, your hands have been up my shirt and skirt for just as long and you're still not even a little hard."

Puck cursed under his breath; he had been focusing so much on not thinking about Kurt that he hadn't even paid attention to the Latina girl.

"Well?" Santana crossed her arms in front of her chest. "I don't want to waste my time with you if your mind is somewhere else." She pushed the boy aside and opened the door. "Next time, don't bother looking for me if you're not in the mood," and then she left.

Noah leaned against the wall and closed his eyes. All he could see was Kurt's face while he was inside the smaller boy… lips parted and swollen from the kissing and the biting, blushed skin and strong thighs around his waist keeping him in place.

He glanced down and saw that he was already half hard. "Great, now you're working." He didn't want to think about what it could mean that being with Santana while thinking about Kurt seemed not to work for him, almost making him feel guilty, but being alone and thinking about the boy was enough to get him hard.

He heard the bell ring and opened the door of the janitor's closet. He was closing it behind him when Kurt walked in front of him. He acted on instinct before his brain could tell him to stop, and reached out grabbing his secret lover by the elbow.

"What…" Kurt tensed, but one look at Puck relaxed him enough to let the boy drag him inside the closet.

Puck closed the door behind him and slid his arms around the slender waist and pulled Kurt up against him. "Hey."

Kurt chuckled sliding his arms around Puck's neck. "Hey, yourself." He boldly got up on his tiptoes and gave his boy a brief kiss barely letting their lips brush before pulling back. He smiled at the annoyed expression on the running back's face. "Why did you drag me in here?"

"Felt like it. Now, give me a real kiss." Without waiting for the other boy to kiss him again, Puck took the matter into his own hands and leaned down, planting his lips firmly on Kurt's. The soprano sighed against his mouth and Noah tightened his hold around his waist.

Kurt moved his lips against Puck's, shivering as always when his secret lover's tongue stroked his lips parting them. He let Noah have his way, melting in his strong arms and tightening his around the boy's neck. He felt one of the hands resting on his lower back sliding down until it was resting on his ass. He pulled back a little breathlessly. "I have to go to class."

"What do you have now?" Puck asked, briefly stealing another kiss.

"Psychology." Kurt sighed and rested his forehead against his lover's. He wondered why they couldn't always be like this, so close and caring and openly affectionate. "Maybe then I'll understand what's going on in that head of yours."

Puck suddenly let him go. "What do you mean?"

"Nothing," the pale boy shook his head. "I don't know…"

"Kurt…" Noah sighed exasperated, putting some distance between them.

"Why are you like this when we're alone but won't even consider telling our friends about us?" Kurt finally asked. He didn't really expect an answer but looked up at the other boy, waiting for something. There still was a small part of him that wanted to tell him about their baby, that wanted Noah to offer to raise their child together and… he shook his head stirring his thoughts away from that fantasies because he was pretty sure that Puck would never declare his love for him or anything like. It was pointless to think about them raising their kid together when Puck was never going to come out. But he couldn't help pushing and pushing, searching for a little sparkle of something that would make him feel like he could tell Puck the truth.

"What's to tell?" Puck asked, shrugging, while his inner voice called him a coward. "I don't go around telling what I do with Santana."

"That's because you do it all over the school and how can you…" Kurt trailed off, lowering his gaze, wanting to ask him how could he compare what they had to what he did with the Cheerio. "Never mind."

"Why are you asking me all these stupid questions lately?" the running back asked. "What if you found someone else, why I don't want to tell anyone about what we do… what's up with you?"

"Nothing." Kurt adjusted the strip of his bag on his shoulder and walked around Puck to reach the door. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Wait," the football player grabbed the shorter boy's wrist stopping him. "Can I come over tonight?"

"What's the point? If you don't come over you'll go to Santana's, so just go there." He yanked his arm free and stepped out of the janitor closet before Puck could say anything else.

Once he was alone again in the closet, the jock kicked at the wall out of frustration.

*GLEE*

The day went by slowly, each minute feeling like an hour. Last period was Spanish, which meant Kurt had to sit through the class with both Puck and Finn's gaze on him. He was stubbornly refusing to make eye-contact with either of them, choosing instead to concentrate on what Mr. Shuester was saying. By the time the bell rang, Kurt was ready to snap at his future step-brother and at his secret lover.

Before Finn could get the chance to get up from his desk, the soprano gathered up his things and quickly exited the classroom.

Puck looked between the door through which Kurt had just left, and Finn, who was looking like someone had just kicked his puppy.

"What's wrong with him?" Puck found himself asking after he had picked up his books.

Finn shrugged. "I don't know. I've to go." He quickly left the class going in search of Rachel and Puck had to try really hard not to go after his best friend's girlfriend demanding some answers.

*GLEE*

Kurt used the drive home to rehearse his song since he'd have to sing the next day and he still had to memorize all the lyrics. When he got home, he wasn't surprised to see that his father was already there.

"Kurt?" the man called form the living room and the soprano quickly went to him. "How was school today?"

"Same as always," Kurt replied, sitting down on the sofa next to his dad. "We have to leave in a little while."

Burt nodded. "Yeah, I came home earlier from the garage in case you needed anything. I left Bob to look after it."

"Thanks." Kurt smiled up at his dad and then leaned his head against the man's shoulder. "You're amazing, Dad, you know that right?"

"Are these the hormones already?" Burt tried to joke. "I remember your mother used to be so happy one second and sad the next." He chuckled. "She was always getting angry at me because of something stupid like walking inside the house with my work shoes on, getting dirt all over the floor."

They stayed in silence for a few minutes each lost in their own thoughts. After a while, Kurt sighed and entwined his fingers through his father's. "I wish she was here."

Burt slid an arm around his son's shoulders and brought him closer. "Me too, kid." He closed his eyes tightly reminding himself that Kurt needed him in that moment, that he needed someone to take care of him. He looked up at the clock hanging on the wall and sighed. "We have to go. Better be there a little early."

"Ok." Kurt got up from the sofa and walked over to the front door.

"I'm glad you don't want to change in a new outfit," Burt joked.

Kurt rolled his eyes while stepping outside. "I have to start acting less like a diva and more like an adult right now and changing clothes at every chance, isn't exactly mature."

Burt looked at his son with pride in his eyes. He had spent last night wondering if Kurt could make it, if he was even remotely ready to face something as big as having a kid, but he was going to be there for every step of the way, and could see that Kurt was taking everything seriously.

"I'm proud of you," he said after he had started driving towards David Berry's office.

"Because I got myself knocked up?" Kurt asked, glancing out of his window.

"No, because you're facing the consequences of what you did. Not everyone at your age would do the same."

"I guess." He took his iPod out of his bag and tried to push his thoughts away. He closed his eyes and leaned against the headrest, listening to David Gray singing.

_If you want it  
Come and get it  
Crying out loud  
The love that I was  
Giving you was  
Never in doubt  
And feel it now  
Let go your heart _

A hand shook him awake and Kurt looked around him disoriented before his eyes settled on his father's face.

"You ready?"

Kurt nodded putting away his iPod before getting out of the car. He walked behind Burt keeping his gaze to the floor feeling somehow still ashamed that he got himself pregnant, that he didn't have the courage to talk to Puck because he was afraid of what the other boy might tell him.

Burt stopped at the reception to ask for Dr. Berry and soon he and Kurt were lead to a white door.

They knocked and when they stepped inside the little white room, a man that reminded Kurt of a younger version of Noah Levenstein, greeted them with a smile.

"You must be Kurt," the Doctor said extending his hand to Kurt first and to Burt second. "Rachel told me all about you." He chuckled a little. "She says that you're her only competition in the club."

Kurt smiled at the man knowing that the Doctor was trying to put him at ease. "You raised a very talented girl. Quite annoying though," he smiled and the Dr. Berry laughed.

"I know. We spoiled her." He looked at Burt. "Mr. Hummel, I'm happy that you're here with Kurt." He turned his attention back to the boy. "You're going to need all the help you can get."

"I know."

"Good. We should start with some tests. I will take some blood and then we can do an ultrasound while we wait for the results. Is that ok, Kurt?"

"Yes."

Kurt went through the tests like he had done with Dr. Anderson, simply holding his hand up when needed, lift his shirt when needed… he was feeling like in order to survive everything, he needed to shut down. It was Burt's hand on his shoulder that shook him out of his daze.

"Are you sure you're ok, Kurt?"

"Yeah. I'm just scared." It was true. Every time he stopped to think about it, he was convinced that he was never going to make it.

"We can do the ultrasound now." Dr. Berry made him lie down on the bed and put cold gel on his stomach. He wasn't even sure that he wanted to hear the heartbeat, not if Puck wasn't there. Then he shook his head, reminding himself that Puck was never going to be there.

He felt the transducer moving up and down his belly and after a few moments, a steady heartbeat filled the room. Kurt felt Burt's hand tighten around his shoulder and when he looked up, there were tears in his father's eyes.

"Dad?"

Burt looked down and smiled. "What is it son?"

"Thanks for being here, you know."

Burt nodded in acknowledgment before looking over at Dr. Berry. "So, is everything ok?"

"Yes," the doctor replied nodding. "It's still early, so I won't be able to tell you if you're going to have a little boy or a little girl, but everything looks normal. 120 bpms. It's perfect." He looked at Kurt and smiled kindly at the teen. He was sorry that someone so young was going to have to face such a responsibility, but, at the same time, he saw determination in Kurt's eyes and was sure that he was going to make it. After all, he had Burt Hummel beside him and he was sure that they would make it.

Kurt's eyes were glued to the monitor. Everything was black and white and gray and he couldn't really make out any sort of form, but the heartbeat was there, his baby was alive and was healthy and he could feel his eyes welling up with tears.

"Everything is ok, then? Are you sure?"

"Yes, Kurt, you don't need to worry about the baby." Dr. Berry sighed and turned off the sonogram machine after having printed out a copy of the sonogram pictures. "But I'm worried about you."

"What?" Burt and Kurt asked at the same time.

"Yes." Dr. Berry got up from the stool standing next to the bed and handed some paper towel to Kurt so he could wipe his belly. Then, he walked back to his desk. "You look tired and way too tiny to be strong enough to carry a pregnancy. You're young and this is the first time you've been pregnant, so there is a high risk of miscarrying before the first trimester is over." He held up a hand when Kurt opened his mouth to speak. "Now, I don't want you to get stressed about this. You need to rest and eat and once the tests are back, we'll work out the best solution for you, ok? In the mean time, remember that while you're still early into your pregnancy, it would be best if you refrained from straining activities."

Kurt nodded. "Of course." He was getting more and more scared as each second passed. He tried to take a big breath to calm himself down and his hand flew automatically to his belly. He didn't want to lose that little live growing inside him. He could feel Burt's worried gaze on him, but didn't look up.

"Kurt, I want you to know that if you take care of yourself adequately, you're going to have a healthy baby, alright? I just had to warn you because you're young and when you're young, you believe that you're invincible."

"We will do everything we can to ensure that Kurt and the baby are perfectly healthy." Burt cut in.

"Good. Then all we have to do now, is wait for the results and I'll be able to prescribe you your vitamins." Dr. Berry smiled again at Kurt but Kurt couldn't find it in him to return the gesture.

*GLEE*

Kurt felt like he was suddenly Juno. He was standing in front of the mirror with his shirt raised, sliding his hand across his abdomen. It was ridiculous and he still wasn't showing so there was no need to do such a thing, but he found that knowing that that tiny little life was growing under his palm, made him feel like it was really happening and that he wasn't alone; he felt reassured. He shook his head and walked over to the bed.

As soon as they had gotten home, Burt had forced Kurt on the sofa in the living room and cooked dinner. There was a reason Kurt was in charge of their meals. But Kurt let him do it because he knew that Burt needed to feel like there was something that he could do for his kid.

So Kurt had laid down on the sofa snuggled up in a blanket and peacefully drifted off to sleep until dinner was ready. He was currently getting ready for bed. It was ten p.m. and he felt stupid at going to sleep so early, but he was tired.

Once he was under the covers, his eyes drifted to the window that Puck used to come inside through. He had left it open like any other night and wondered why he still did it. Talking with him that morning, and finding out that he had been in the janitor closet with Santana (he had overheard Santana telling Brittany that he couldn't get it up for her), should have been other reasons to finally break whatever he had going on with Puck, but he couldn't bring himself to let it go. '_Not yet,_' he told himself.

He closed his eyes and turned around, hiding his face under the pillow and tried to fall asleep. It was several hours later when he finally managed to do it.

*GLEE*

"Burt called mom yesterday and told us to come over. I thought we were going to Breadstix tomorrow." Finn was casually leaning against the locker next to Kurt's making sure that none of the guys from the football team tried to shove Kurt or slushy him.

Burt had told him that morning that it was better to do it on Friday so Finn could have more days to get used to it before they had to see each other at school again. "Yeah we have something to tell you and Carole that can't wait."

"Oh, ok."

Kurt closed his locker and fell into step next to Finn. He could feel everyone looking at them but decided to ignore it. He had heard Ben Israel saying that Rachel was Finn's cover girlfriend and that the truth was that he was with Kurt. He was sick and tired of all the stupid rumors.

"Mom told me that we're probably going to move in soon."

"Yeah, I think we could actually make it work." He tried to sound cheerful at the idea because Finn had a stupid little grin on his face, but Kurt was still afraid that Carole and Finn were going to run away as soon as they heard about him.

"I could come over after glee." Finn's voice cut through Kurt's thoughts. "We could do our homework and then I can help you set everything up for dinner."

Kurt smiled at the boy stopping out of his English class. "That would be great, actually."

"Awesome." Finn patted him on the shoulder and then left for his class. Kurt watched him go hoping with all himself that things were going to work out because he didn't want to make his father suffer because he had gotten himself knocked up.

He turned around and walked inside his class feeling sad and guilty and not even Sam's cheerful greeting was enough to make him feel better.

*GLEE*

"Alright guys, I'm going to pick names out of the hat and you're gonna perform in that order, ok?" Mr. Shue turned to the piano and fished the first name out of the hat. Mike went up and sang his song followed by Tina, Mercedes, Santana, Finn, Brittany, Artie and Quinn. They all sang happy songs about feeling ok with themselves or about finally being in love.

However, when Rachel's name was called, the girl got up from her seat, adjusted her skirt, walked to the center of the room and looked straight at Kurt. "Lately, I've found a good friend in someone I thought hated me. Therefore, I'm going to sing a song that I want to dedicate him because it's how I feel most of the times and because I know that he needs it."

Kurt's face twisted into a horrified grimace and he desperately hoped that the song wouldn't give his secret away. To his surprise, however, Rachel started singing "Fireworks" by Katy Perry. She stared at him the whole time and he could see in her eyes that she meant every word. It made him feel uneasy, like he should have paid more attention to her because they were both in glee and should have been friends long before they started sharing a secret.

When Rachel finished singing, Kurt smiled at her and she went to seat down next to him gripping his hand and squeezing. "A little bit over dramatic," he said, "but thank you."

Mercedes looked at the two suspiciously but, before she could ask what was going on with them, Mr. Shue called Kurt.

Kurt stood up from his seat sighing heavily. He stopped himself from patting his belly, like he had started doing ever since the sonogram, in a gesture to calm his nerves.

"I don't have something insightful to say. It's what I'm feeling, it's about love tearing you apart but still loving that person because it's love and even if it hurts, you can't just turn it off." He kept his eyes to the ground to stop himself from searching for Puck's eyes.

He handed the music sheet over to the band and walked to the center of the class, took a deep breath and started singing.

_This years love had better last_

_Heaven knows it's high time_

_I've been waiting on my own too long_

_But when you hold me like you do_

_It feels so right oh now_

_I start to forget_

_How my heart gets torn_

_When that hurt gets thrown_

_Feeling like you can't go on…_

He darted a look around the room and saw everyone looking at him surprised, except for Puck. Puck was staring right back at him, his arms crossed in front of his chest. For a moment, the other members of the club disappeared and he couldn't close his eyes or divert them before starting to sing again.

_Turning circles and time again_

_It cut like a knife oh now_

_If you love me got to know for sure_

_'Cause it takes something more this time_

_Than sweet sweet lies oh now_

_Before I open up my arms and fall_

_Losing all control_

_Every dream inside my soul_

_When you kiss me on that midnight street_

_Sweep me off my feet_

_Singing ain't this life so sweet… _

His voice broke a little on the last word and he willed himself to look away. His eyes locked with Rachel who had tears in her eyes. Yeah, she could get it.

_This years love had better last_

_Cause whose to worry_

_If our hearts get torn_

_When that hurt gets thrown_

_Don't yuh know this life goes on_

_Won't you kiss me on that midnight street_

_Sweep me off my feet_

_Singing ain't this life so sweet_

_This years love had better last…_

He let the music die away before looking up again.

"Well, Kurt, that was some emotional song," Mr. Shue said, getting up and coming to pat him on his shoulder. "Well done."

Kurt nodded and went to take back his seat. He could feel eleven pairs of eyes on him, but he kept his gaze firmly on the floor and was grateful when Mr. Shue called Sam.

"So, I chose this song but I didn't have lot of time to prepare it, but it really helps me get what I'm feeling out in the open. So, yeah… I'm just gonna shut up and sing." He nodded towards the Jazz Band and then started singing "Tightrope" by Paul Freeman.

Kurt felt Rachel squeeze his hand and looked up finding her giving him a confused look.

"Is he singing to you?" she asked, in a whisper.

Kurt frowned and looked back at Sam who, when their eyes locked, smiled at him shyly. He felt the need to get up and run away, but told himself that he was wrong, that Sam obviously wasn't singing to him because really, since when was Sam into him? He couldn't handle something like this in that moment. He waited for Sam to finish singing and was actually grateful that Puck was the only one left.

"Ok, thank you, Sam. Puck, it's your turn."

Puck got up from his seat and, on his way to the center of the room, brushed against Kurt's shoulder. Kurt cursed himself when he shuddered at the contact and when, rising his gaze, he almost smiled seeing that Puck was looking at him.

"No big speech, I just sing." He said quickly, before sliding on his guitar and started singing.

Kurt didn't know the song, but Rachel gasped surprised and leaned close to him to whisper in his ear, "It's "Song Sung Blue" by Neil Diamond. It's a love song."

He found himself unable to look away from Puck. He felt that little hope that everything was going to be ok surging inside him. The words of the song could relate to what they had but Kurt had to wonder why he had chose that song when he had always labeled what they had as "sex and nothing more."

Mr. Shue had made them promise not to comment on the others' songs because he had asked them to be personal, to express their own feelings and therefore, no one had to explain their choice of song. Kurt was sure that that was the only reason why Puck was singing that song. He was surprised to see that Puck kept glancing at him with such nonchalantly, that it looked like he didn't mean anything by it.

After Puck had gone back to his seat, Mr. Shue clapped loudly and smiled. "I'm very proud of you guys. That was awesome. Now, next week we're going to do the Girls vs. Boys competition. However, this time, you're going to have to step out of your comfort zone. You girls will do a song that has been done from men, while you boys, a song that has been done from women. You can go now."

Rachel got up and walked over to the other girls already talking about what song they could sing. Kurt got up slowly, knowing that he had to wait for Finn and, at the same time, trying to avoid facing Sam.

"Hey, Kurt, do you have a song in mind?" Artie asked him rolling his wheelchair up to him.

"No, sorry. I'll leave you guys to choose it." He smiled at the boy and then turned his attention to Finn. "You ready to go? I want to take a bath before dinner and I need time."

Finn nodded and picked up his things. They ignored the looks they were getting from Sam, Puck, Mike and Artie. After almost a week, they were kind of used to it.

"Wait, where are you going together?" Sam sounded confused and Kurt didn't turn around to see what expression he had on his face.

"We're having a family dinner tonight and I'm going over to Kurt's now so we can study and hang out, you know."

"We better leave," Kurt said before they could ask other questions.

They walked out of the choir room in a comfortable silence until Finn decided to ask once again if he could know what Kurt and Burt had to tell him and Carole.

Kurt rolled his eyes. "I swear, Finn, sometimes you're like a big baby." He was about to step behind the steering wheel but tossed the keys at Finn at the last moment. "You drive."

"What? Kurt…"

"I didn't sleep well last night and I'm kind of tired, it's better if you drive."

Finn looked at him concerned but nodded. As soon as they were seated, Kurt turned on the radio, determined not to talk about his song or what he had to tell during dinner. In order not to break down, he'd close every stressful thought about Puck and the baby in a little box, opening it only when needed. He was determined not to open it until they had finished eating dessert later that night.

*GLEE*

"So, Kurt has something to say," Burt announced while they were eating dessert. The afternoon had gone great, the dinner too and Burt was fairly sure that everything was going to work out in the end.

Carole looked at the boy smiling like always. "What is it?"

"I…" Kurt put down his fork ignoring his father's stern gaze. He knew that he had to start eating more, but he was feeling so nervous that he couldn't force the food down his throat. "I'm…" He turned his eyes on Burt and silently pleaded to his father to say something, but Burt shook his head.

"I hope you won't run away after I tell you this, because we love you and we want to be a family with you," he blurted out. He lowered his gaze when Carole and Finn both looked at him worried.

"It's ok, son," Burt put a reassuring hand on Kurt's shoulder and squeezed.

"I'm pregnant."

Carole's eyes widened and her hand flew to her mouth. Kurt was already getting ready to beg them not to leave them.

"How is that even possible?" Finn asked, cutting into the heavy silence.

They looked at him for a few moments before Carole said, "Honey, when two people…"

"No, no I didn't mean that." He shrugged off Carole's hand from his forearm and looked at Kurt. "I mean, how can you be pregnant when you're the only gay boy in Lima?"

"Finn, don't ask me who's the other father is because I'm not gonna tell you. It's not up to me." He took a deep breath to calm himself down before saying, "But since I'm pregnant, there's obviously another guy in town that likes boys."

"But…"

"The point is that Kurt is going to need us all. He needs a family," Burt cut him off. Carole nodded without hesitation and reached over the table to squeeze Kurt's hand.

Finn looked between Kurt, Carole and Burt before finally fixing his gaze on the boy. "Wait, you mean he's not gonna help you?"

"I…" Kurt didn't want to get into it again, but he should have known that that question would arise. "What we had was never important, so I'm going to have the kid on my own. Well…" he shrugged, "hopefully, you and Carole will stay with us even though I'm a freak."

"You're not a freak, Kurt," Finn quickly said. He may have had a problem with Kurt last year, but now things were different. "This is why Rachel asked me to look out for you, isn't it?"

"Yes. Don't be mad at her, please. I asked her not to tell anyone and for once she actually kept her mouth shout."

"Ok, I get it, but why did you tell her?"

"She was there at the right moment. I'm going to tell Mercedes soon, but you two needed to know it sooner than the others."

Carole nodded and smiled through her tears. "I'm happy that you decided to tell us and we're not going anywhere, Kurt, ok?"

Kurt swallowed around the lump forming in his throat and nodded. "Thank you."

"And I'm going to make sure that none of the guys do anything to you."

"Thank you," Burt said for Kurt. "I really needed to hear that before I locked him in his basement and home schooled him."

Kurt rolled his eyes and Finn chuckled.

'_At least I faced the first obstacle,_' Kurt told himself while he accepted Carole's congratulations and Finn's promise to watch over him.

For the first time since finding out about the baby, Kurt felt like he might be able to take a breath and relax. It was a nice change. Now he only had to face Mercedes and the rest of the school. Because sooner or later, it was going to be obvious to anyone with eyes what was happening.

He carefully avoided thinking about what that meant.


	6. So Much to Say

**Title**: Love Lies Bleeding  
**Warnings**: OOC, MPreg  
**Beta**: lemong_drop151  
**Words Count Chapter**: 6450  
**Words Count Story**: 35247  
**A/N**: I can't believe that this story is already so long!

* * *

**Love Lies Bleeding Chapter 5 – So Much to Say**

_I say my hell is the closet I'm stuck inside_  
_Can't see the light_  
_Open up my head and let me out little baby_  
_'Cos here we have been standing for a long long time_  
_Can't see the light _

The light coming from the little circular window on the north side of the attic cast a shadow across the room, making visible the dust floating in the air. Kurt hadn't been in that room in a while, barely getting in and out in passing while putting away boxes with old clothes. But now he had gone up there looking for something specific.

The door squeaked from the rare use when pushed open and Kurt quietly walked to the boxes on the far corner of the attic. They were labeled with "Mary Ann's Things", "Old House Things", "Vinyls", "Unwanted Gifts to re-use" and the last one, the one Kurt was looking for, with "From When We Were Waiting For Our Boy".

For a moment Kurt hesitated and his hand stood mid air. Finally, he let his fingers trace the dusty cardboard and a small, sad smile, graced his features. The box was above all the rest, right next to the one where Burt had put away part of his mother's things so Kurt didn't have to lift any boxes to get to the one he needed.

He picked it up and put it on the floor, for a moment he considered sitting down, but he was already dressed for school and he didn't have lot of time. His plan had been to go up there when Burt wasn't at home so his father wouldn't get sad, then bring everything down into his room and leave it there until he came back from school later that day.

The handwriting on the box was Marry Ann's and Kurt traced every letter feeling his smile broadening.

"I bet you'd be happy to be a grandmother, mom," he quietly said before bending down to lift box. He stopped when he reached the door and before closing it, he glanced at the rocking chair sitting covered by a white sheet in one of the corners of the attic. "I wish you were here." He could feel the tears welling up in his eyes and before he could completely break down, he took the box downstairs to his room.

He left it beside the bed and checked himself in the mirror to see if his clothes were still clean and then went up to the kitchen to drink a glass of juice. He was about to start drinking when the front door opened.

"Kurt? You ready?" Finn looked around for a moment before spotting Kurt standing in the kitchen. "Hey, sorry, I'm late."

"You shouldn't have had to come." Kurt knew it was an old argument because Finn had spent the weekend telling him that he'd do everything to be sure that Kurt and his little guy were ok. Kurt had asked him "What if it's a girl?" but Finn had been sure it was going to be a boy.

"You know I won't budge on this. So, you ready?"

Kurt nodded quickly downing his glass before retrieving his shoulder-bag and following Finn outside. When they were both in the old car, Kurt couldn't help but laugh. "You're driving me to school so I won't get tossed into the dumpster, but I know about the mailman. Am I really safe with you?"

Finn glanced at him for a moment finding that old sparkle in his blue eyes and couldn't help but gave him his trademark lopsided grin. "I'll be careful."

"Then watch the street," Kurt told him, still laughing.

They turned on the radio and didn't talk about the baby, or the baby's daddy or what Kurt was going to do all the way to the school and Kurt was glad that for a little while, he could feel something different than just pregnant.

After Finn had parked the car, he stepped out and went to open the car-door for Kurt who rolled his eyes at him but said thank you nonetheless.

"You're taking this too seriously."

Finn shrugged. "I'm doing what's right. Burt told me that Rachel's dad told you not to strain yourself."

"Yes, he did, but I'm only 10 weeks along, so you can calm down." Out of the corner of his eyes, Kurt saw some students looking at them suspiciously. He sighed and glanced up at Finn. "They are going to think we're together."

Finn frowned and looked around the parking lot noticing the people staring at them. "Maybe I shouldn't have opened the door for you."

Kurt smiled and nodded. "I know how uncomfortable you must be feeling so..."

"Hey," Finn stepped in front of him and shook his head. "It doesn't matter, ok?"

"Finn..."

Kurt was interrupted when Karofsky voice sounded loudly across the parking lot. "Hey, Hudson! Bring the fairy here."

Finn frowned and took a step in the direction of the dumpster where the football team was waiting. However, when he felt a hand gently grabbing his arm, he stopped and looked at Kurt.

"Don't do anything stupid, please?"

"But..."

"If you get suspended, then who's gonna protect me?" Kurt smiled at him when Finn nodded. "Good. Now, let's get going. I don't want to be late."

Finn started walking towards the school entrance ignoring the jocks yelling at them from the dumpster and when he noticed that Kurt was walking a couple of steps back, he stopped, grabbed Kurt's jacket and tagged him closer so their hands would brush with each step.

"Thank you," Kurt said quietly. He glanced at the dumpster and his eyes locked with Puck's. He could see confusion in those hazel eyes he loved and something more. Finally, shaking his head, he fell into a light chat with Finn while they walked inside the school.

Rachel met them at Kurt's locker. She gave them both a broad smile before kissing Finn on the cheek and sliding her arm through Kurt's as soon as he had retrieved all his books.

"So, how are you?"

"Good, Rachel, thanks."

"So, Mercedes told me that there's a Glee sleepover this Saturday."

"A Glee sleepover?" asked Finn walking on the other side of Kurt so the boy was between him and Rachel.

"Yeah I promised Mercedes to have one."

Rachel hesitated for a moment, glancing at Finn before leaning in closer. "Are we all invited?"

Kurt sighed in defeat and nodded. "Yeah."

"Oh."

Finn looked at them in confusion. "What's going on?"

"Noth..." Kurt was cut off when he was suddenly hit by iced corn syrup. He gasped and his feet slid on the slushie that had ended up on the floor.

"Fuck," Finn shouted trying to catch Kurt before he could hit the floor. He was able to slid an arm around his slim waist and tag him closer to balance him. "Kurt, are you ok?" his tone was full of fear and he started patting Kurt to check for injuries.

"Finn, Finn," Kurt said a few times before Finn finally looked at him. "I'm ok."

As soon as the words had left Kurt's mouth, Finn turned around and pushed the jock that had thrown the slushie at Kurt up against the lockers. "What is wrong with you?"

The jock, someone Kurt didn't know the name of, looked scared at Finn and held up his hands in surrender. "It was nothing, man. You're keeping him away from the dumpster and..."

"So what?" Finn pushed the jock and almost lift him from the floor. "Stay away, ok?"

"Finn?" Rachel put her hand on Finn's forearm and squeezed. "We should go before the teachers start to arrive. Mercedes saw what happened and she's took Kurt to the bathroom. C'mon."

Finn glared once again at the jock before stepping back. "Stay away," he repeated before turning to Rachel. "Is he ok?"

Rachel smiled fondly at him before entwining their hands and starting to lead him towards their first class. "Yes. It was just a slushie and you caught him before he'd end up on the floor. You're being great, Finn."

"He's little, you know? I mean, not defenseless because he has a way with words that make you feel less than scum under his shoes, but when it comes down to fights and all that, he's little. Guys like Karofsky and Azimio could probably beat him to death and..."

"You're doing great," Rachel reassured him.

"I hope so. Burt won't forgive me this time if something happens and I couldn't forgive myself either."

*GLEE*

"It was stupid to think that now that Finn has suddenly turned into your shadow nothing was going to happen." Mercedes kept wiping the blue slushie with a moist towelette from Kurt's face.

"Yeah, well, at least I didn't end up in a dumpster." He stepped away from Mercedes and opened the faucet putting his head under the water.

Mercedes leaned against the sink next to his and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Why is Finn acting like that? And before you start, don't give me any bullshit about him starting to act like a brother because of what happened with Burt."

Kurt glanced at her and sighed. He guessed that that was as good a time as any to tell her the truth, so, after having closed the faucet and picked the little towel he kept in his bag to dry off his hair, he looked at her. "I'm sorry I haven't told you before but I didn't know what was going on and then, when I found out, I was scared to tell anyone."

Mercedes furrowed her brow. "I don't understand."

"I only told dad, Finn, Carole and..." he hesitated for a moment before saying, "and Rachel."

"Rachel?" She shook her head. "Never mind that. Tell me what is going on."

"Mercedes, I..." he lowered his gaze, the words stuck in his throat.

"You what?"

"I'm pregnant."

Mercedes' eyes widened and she opened her mouth uselessly a few times before putting her hands on her hips glaring at him. "How long have you been lying to me, Kurt?"

"I... 'Cedes, please, don't be mad." He felt tears welling up in his eyes and damned his hormones for the millionth time. "I was afraid of what you would have said about what I... what I was doing with that boy and... and... I'm sorry." A sob cut him off and he looked pleadingly at his best friend.

"Ok, ok, calm down, Kurt," she stepped away from the sink and pulled the trembling boy in her arms feeling him clutching at her like a lifeline while he kept murmuring apologies. She had never seen him so shuttered and she understood that that wasn't the moment when she could be angry because Kurt needed his best friend and now Mercedes got why Finn was so protective all of a sudden. She pulled away a little so she could look Kurt in the eyes and smiled. "I felt like I didn't know what to tell you. I saw you being sad but you weren't opening up and I didn't know how to push. I'm sorry you thought that you couldn't trust me, but Kurt, I'm going to be next to you, ok?"

Kurt nodded and hugged her again. "I'm sorry."

"It's ok." Mercedes wiped away the tears from Kurt's cheeks and opened the faucet again. "You better clean up. The bell is about to ring."

"Thank you." He smiled tentatively at her before starting to wash his face. He was dreading the question he knew was about to be asked.

"So..."

"I can't tell you," he cut her off and was happy when all she did was sigh heavily.

"Is he in the closet?"

Kurt nodded before closing the faucet and starting to dry his face. "Yeah."

"And you can't out him. Ok. But you can tell me, I won't..."

"I don't want to talk about it, Mercedes, please. I already have to listen to Rachel going on and on about how I should tell him but I know him and... and I don't want my baby to know that his father thought I was a slut or something like that," his voice started to raise out of frustration and he angrily threw his things back in his bag. "That he didn't want us or was ashamed of us."

Mercedes held her hands up in surrender. "Woah, calm down white boy. I wasn't going to tell you to talk to the guy. You said you know him and you know what's best, I just wanted you to tell me who the guy is."

Kurt took a deep breath and slung the strap of his bag over his shoulder. "I don't want to talk about him. It was nothing. I was stupid and fell in love with a jerk that simply started fucking with me because he was bored and wanted to try something new and..."

"Kurt, calm down, ok?" Mercedes put her hands on the boy's shoulders and shook him. "I'm helping you in whatever way you need, no questions asked."

"Thank you."

"You said that Rachel is tormenting you about it?" she asked while they exited the bathroom.

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Yeah."

"Then I'll let her do it for both of us."

Kurt laughed while sliding his arm through Mercedes'.

*GLEE*

He should have known that people would have started to notice sooner rather than later. The hope that until he started showing no one was going to pick on what was going on with him was wishful thinking. He found how wrong he was during third period in Spanish, two days after he had told Mercedes about his pregnancy.

Mr. Shue was going on and on about the difference between regular and irregular verbs and Kurt was doodling on his notebooks drawing little outfits for baby boys and baby girls when the wave of nausea suddenly hit him.

He knew that in the last week it had happened too often for no one to notice but he still had hoped. However, this time, the wave of nausea was stronger than the last few times so he had to shot out of the class before Mr. Shue could ask him what was wrong.

Puck's eyes followed his boy out of the class and when he glanced back down at his notebook after the door had closed, he caught Finn's worried gaze still lingering on the door. He was about to ask him what was wrong with Kurt when he caught the two jocks sitting behind him laughing.

"I guess the fag got knocked up when he paid for sex."

"You're right. Who would tap that if not for money?"

The two jocks laughed again and Puck's hand closed so tightly around his pencil that it snapped in half. He was so close to turning around and punching the two in the face that he had to grip the edge of his desk to stop.

"Mr. Shue, can I go check on Kurt?"

Puck looked sharply at Finn feeling that strange feeling he had been feeling lately spreading inside him. Looking at Finn's concerned face and remembering that him and Kurt had been coming school together for the last week, he felt the anger growing stronger and stronger.

"Yes, Finn." Mr. Shue wrote down a note and handed it to Finn who practically ran out of the class. Mr. Shue started his lesson from where he had left off but Puck's attention was focused on the door.

He knew that he had no right to feel jealous because Finn and Kurt seemed joined at the hip lately, but he couldn't help it. He had caught Sam looking at Kurt too and the song he had sang in Glee was a dead give away that he had feelings for Kurt, and Puck was getting more and more mad with each look Sam threw Kurt's way, with every time Finn would open doors for Kurt, sliding his arm around his shoulders, leaving school with Kurt...

"Puck, is everything ok?"

Looking at Mr. Shue, Puck frowned. "Yeah."

"Ok. You look a little tense," the teacher said smiling at him.

"I'll just go out for a moment." He got up from his desk, ignoring Mr. Shue's voice and quickly walked towards the girls bathroom where he knew he could find Kurt.

He was about to push open the door when he heard Finn's voice. "You sure you're ok?"

"Yes, thank you Finn. It's normal."

He heard water starting running and pushed the door open a little to peek inside. Finn was wiping Kurt's mouth with a wet paper-towel. "This sucks."

Kurt chuckled and took the paper-towel from Finn's hand. "Tell me about it."

Puck frowned feeling the doubt of finding out that what the jocks had been joking about was real starting to creep in his mind. When Finn's eyes fell to Kurt's stomach, Puck clenched his hands into tight fists.

"I still can't believe it." He had that little lopsided grin on his face and Kurt was smiling just as softly.

"It's pretty amazing, isn't it?" Kurt threw away the paper-towel. "Thank you for coming to check on me."

Finn raised his eyes to look into Kurt's. "You don't have to thank me." His eyes fell down again and he cleared his throat nervously. "Can I..." he waved his hand in the general direction of Kurt's stomach and Kurt laughed.

"He's not kicking yet and I'm not showing."

"I know but can I..."

Kurt gently grabbed Finn's wrist and pushed his hand between his jumper and his shirt. He shivered and chuckled, "Your hand is cold."

"Sorry," Finn said distractedly and made no move to pull his hand away. Instead, he got a little closer and he looked completely awed. "So now you believe me that it's going to be a little guy?"

"I guess so." Kurt shook his head laughing and his eyes sparkled like Puck had never seen them doing before. "The other day I went up into the attic looking for the things of when my mom was expecting me, and I found a little football jersey that my dad had bought for me. I think I'm going to use it if it's a boy."

Finn's grin turned into a full on smile. "I can't wait to see the little guy."

Puck turned away from the bathroom before he could hear anything else. He walked down the hall feeling full of anger and frustration. Feeling himself starting to lose control, he headed to the locker room so he could go blow off some steam lifting weights, however, he could still hear Finn and Kurt's words going on and on in his head and on impulse, he punched in one of the lockers as soon as he was in the room. He felt the pain shooting up his hand and the blood starting to flow from the wounds on his knuckles. He pulled the hand away and hit the locker once again this time out of the frustration of knowing that he would never be brave enough to come out to the school, never able to walk down the hall holding Kurt like Finn did practically every day. He felt like his best friend was stealing something away from him and even if he'd never find the courage to be the man Kurt deserved, he didn't want to let go. Not yet.

"Puckerman! What the hell are you doing?"

The voice of coach Beiste rang through the locker room but Puck didn't want to stop. He was feeling pain and he didn't want it tearing up his heart while images of Finn and Kurt kept going on and on in his mind. He pulled his fist back to strike again, but his wrist was grabbed from the coach.

"Stop!" She dragged Puck over to one of the benches and made him sit down. "What the hell came over you?"

Puck kept his gaze on the floor glaring at the tiles instead of looking up at the coach.

"Puckerman, if you don't start talking, I'm going to have to send you to the Principal." She let a few minutes going by in silence but in the end, she shook her head and sighed. "C'mon, I'm taking you to Figgins."

Puck didn't say a word barely trailing after the coach without lifting his gaze up. The bell rang loudly and the students started flowing into the halls.

"Puck? What did you do?"

Finn's voice caught Puck's ears and he turned around and, before he could remind himself that he had slept around on Kurt since their first time and so he had no right to be jealous or feel betrayed, he launched at his best friend and tackled him down on the floor.

"Puckerman!"

He had managed to hit Finn on the chin by the time Coach Beiste was able to pull him away. "What the hell is going on with you today?"

Puck glared at Finn feeling the pain in his hand growing. He shrugged off the Coach's arms and turned around to follow her to the Principal's office knowing that there was no way he could get out of a suspension now, and his eyes locked with Kurt's.

Kurt was looking at him completely shocked; his eyes open wide and his mouth was moving around soundless words. Kurt frowned and made a step in his direction before stopping, remembering that Puck didn't want for people to find out about them and how could he explain his caring for Puck all of a sudden without people figuring something out?

So he shook his head and walked over to Finn who was getting up from the floor. "Are you ok?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah," Finn answered, massaging his aching chin.

Kurt looked back at Puck while Coach Beiste dragged him towards Figgins' office. Their eyes locked and for the first time since what they had started, Kurt couldn't recognize the emotion he saw in those hazel eyes.

"C'mon, Finn," Rachel grabbed her boyfriend by his hand and dragged him towards the nurse's office looking for an ice-pack. On her way, she looked worriedly at Kurt biting down on her bottom lip but Kurt shrugged and headed in the opposite direction.

Throughout the day, the whisperings about Puck and Finn's fight and Kurt's sickness, kept going on around the school. By the time the last bell rang and glee was about to start, the official gossip was that Finn had knocked up Kurt, Rachel was a fake-girlfriend and Puck had punched Finn trying to beat the gay out of him.

Mercedes had laughed hearing the story and so had done Rachel while Finn had shrugged it off saying that they could think whatever they wanted. Kurt had still to face the other glee club's members and he was dreading stepping inside the choir room.

After waiting until the very last second, Kurt finally walked inside the choir room. Brittany waved at him happily congratulating himself on his "Capital G Baby", while Santana had murmured "slut" when he had walked by her on his way to the last row.

Mike, Artie and Quinn were glancing at him curiously but no one of them asked him anything. Quinn did glare at him though because apparently, she believed that Finn had left her because he was gay and hadn't had the courage to tell the truth.

Tina had been filled in by Mercedes, so she pulled him into a tight embrace before taking her place next to Mike.

Kurt went to sit on the last row between Finn and Rachel while Mercedes sat down next to Tina.

Sam was the last one to arrive. He walked inside the choir room looking slightly depressed and Kurt sighed heavily when his eyes locked with the quarterback's and Sam looked away quickly.

Mr. Shue walked inside with a frown. "Puck managed to get himself suspended." He looked at Finn and asked, "What was that all about? He didn't want to tell why he hit you."

Finn shrugged. "I don't know, Mr. Shue. I saw him walking with the Coach towards Figgins' office and asked what had happened and he just flipped. He turned around and jumped me."

"Well, whatever it was, Figgins gave him suspension until Monday so I guess we will have to do our Girls vs. Boys another time. I'm sure Puck wouldn't want to miss it."

"Can we talk about how Hummel got himself knocked up?" Santana asked out of the blue with the most bitchy tone she could master. She turned to Kurt and asked, "How did you get Finn to fuck you?"

"Hey, language guys," Mr. Shue cut in, "I'm sure this is not neither the time nor the place for this conversation." He waited for Santana's nod before turning towards Kurt. "You should have said something, Kurt, so I wouldn't have made you dance so much."

"It's ok, Mr. Shue, I'm not far along." Kurt ignored the gazes he could feel fixed on him. He knew that once people found out things would only get worse, but he had hoped to have a little more time. He wondered what Puck thought. He hoped with all his being that he'd come talk to him, maybe show that he cared...

"Kurt?"

Rachel's voice cut through his thoughts and he looked at her noticing only in that moment that his vision was blurred. He wiped at his eyes and tried to get a grip on his emotions. He had been called a slut from the whole football team by the time lunch had rolled around because Finn had been in the nurse office and even with the boy at his side, people still talked.

He hugged his bag to his chest and stood up. The idea of sitting there pretending that everything was ok when he could feel every stare and whisper tearing at his insides was making him sick. "I'm going home, Mr. Shue," he said.

He shrugged off Mercedes and Rachel's concerns and ignored Finn's question about taking him home. He barely waved at Mr. Shue on the way out and practically ran to his SUV glad that that morning Finn hadn't gone to pick him up for school.

Once he was sitting inside the car, he took a deep breath and tried to calm himself down. He took deep breaths and turned on his engine only when he felt himself finally calming down. He drove home trying to push away all the thoughts about Puck and the rumors at school and dragging Finn in his mess and by the time he reached his home, he felt slightly better.

He was glad that his dad still wasn't home because Kurt didn't want to worry him and he knew that he looked worn out and his eyes were puffy and red. He went down into his room and dragged the box with his baby things out from under the bed. He sat cross legged on the floor and opened the box. His mother's diary was on top and he moved it out of the way because every time he read it, he would be assaulted by sadness. Then there was a little teddy bear dressed like a mechanic, bottles and little outfits. On the bottom of the box there was the little jersey his dad had bought for him even before he was born. Kurt picked it up and squeezed it in his hands.

Reminding himself that there was going to be someone who'd need him for the rest of his life, helped him relax and made him feel happy. And, even though the baby was always going to be a reminder of Puck, Kurt couldn't bring himself to feel sorry about it, on the contrary, it made him feel better about everything. The baby was going to be a reminder of a time when he had been able to love unconditionally.

*GLEE*

Kurt didn't go to school for the next two days. Burt was worried about him because Kurt kept lying in bed barely moving. He had called Finn to ask what had happened after he had come home to find Kurt clenching the baby jersey he had bought for him when Mary Ann had been pregnant, and had found out that at school now they knew that Kurt was pregnant.

He had tried to convince Kurt to go to school because it was just a rumor and no one knew whether it was true or not, but Kurt had said that he needed a little time.

Now that the week-end was approaching and with it the sleepover, Burt had called Mercedes and Rachel so they could get everything ready. They came over at the Hummel's house at five so they'd have the time to prepare everything since the glee club was coming over at seven.

Rachel and Mercedes found Kurt lying in bed with his headphones on.

"It's worse than I had expected," Rachel said quietly before walking over to the bed. Kurt had his eyes closed so he still had to notice the two girls standing in his room. Rachel shook him slightly and Kurt sat up startled.

He pulled his headphones off. "What are you doing here?" he asked, looking between Rachel and Mercedes.

"It's Saturday, white boy," Mercedes put down a box full with chips and cans. "The others are coming over in two hours and you need to shower and get dressed because you look like shit."

Kurt sighed deeply. "Can't we cancel? We could do it just the three of us."

"Look, your father has already left. He told us that he was going on a fishing trip and would be back tomorrow." Mercedes put her hands on her hips and raised an eyebrow. "Burt told us that you haven't got out of bed in two days. What the hell is up with that?"

"I just wanted to be on my own for a while."

"Kurt, you look quite depressed." Rachel looked at him worriedly. "I know he shouldn't talk to me about you because you're his patient, but dad told me to keep an eye on you because you may fall into a depression."

Kurt rolled his eyes and got up from the bed. "I'm not depressed. I just needed a little time." He walked over to the wardrobe and took out a couple of sweat pants and a t-shirt. When he turned around, he found Mercedes and Rachel looking at him concerned. "I'm not depressed."

"You never wear things so simple," Rachel said.

"Yeah but this is a sleepover so." He trailed off and walked over to the bathroom's door. "I'm going to take a shower, alright?" As soon as he had closed the door to the bathroom behind him, Kurt turned on the shower and then sat down on the tiled floor with his back resting against the bathtub. He leaned his forehead on his knees and took a deep breath.

He knew that Puck had been suspended, but he had thought that the boy would have called him, but he hadn't. Kurt had spent the last two days staring at his cellphone ignoring the calls from everyone hoping that Puck would call. He was scared at the idea that in a little over a hour Puck would probably be over. He wanted to ask about him, but with Mercedes not knowing the truth, he couldn't risk it.

Kurt stood up and quickly took off his clothes before stepping under the shower spray. He let the hot water massage his shoulders while his hands started to unconsciously rub his stomach. Soon enough, he was softly humming a song.

Two hours later, the glee members started to arrive. Brittany greeted him with a hug and a pat on the stomach, Santana nodded at him, Mike and Finn gave him a pat on the shoulder and Artie a wave of his hand while Tina hugged him tightly. Sam stood on the front porch awkwardly looking at Kurt from under his blond bangs.

"Hey," Kurt said quietly with a small smile.

"Hi!"

"What are you waiting for? Come on inside." Kurt grabbed him from his wrist and pulled him inside shutting the door behind them. The awkward moment seemed to pass while Kurt dragged Sam downstairs in the basement.

Kurt was about to sit down on the bed with Sam when the doorbell rang again. He declined Finn's offer to go open the door and went to see who had arrived. He opened the door finding Quinn standing there with a little smile.

"Hey, Kurt."

"I wasn't sure you'd come," he said, while Quinn stepped inside and he closed the door.

"I talked with Finn and he explained that he wasn't secretly in the closet."

"Yeah he's just helping me out."

Quinn nodded. "I know that now. I think it's great."

They walked down in the basement and she went to sit on the couch with Mercedes, Tina and Santana while Brittany sat on the floor with her back leaning against Santana's legs. Mike and Finn were sitting on the floor next to Artie's chair all three of them looking at videogames while Rachel sat against his boyfriend while speaking with the girls.

Kurt was sitting cross legged on the edge of the bed and Sam was next to him and they were both standing in an awkward silence.

"So," Sam cleared his throat nervously and glanced at Kurt glad that the others were too busy talking to hear him. "You missed on school the last couple of days. We were... we were worried."

"Yeah I wasn't feeling like facing the school, you know?" Kurt sighed and looked at Sam biting his lower lip. "I hate that it's everything so awkward."

"It was just all out of the blue. We didn't know that you were seeing someone so it was kind of unexpected."

"Yeah. Are you going to ask me who's the other father? Because that's what everyone has been asking me lately."

Sam shook his head and Kurt saw sadness shine in the blond's eyes. "I won't."

"Thank you," Kurt said offering a small smile.

"Do you know what happened between Finn and Puck?"

Kurt shook his head because he really had no idea. He had called Finn to ask him about it, but Finn really didn't have a clue about what had come over his best friend. "He just jumped him and no one knows why. Well, Puck does but I'm sure he won't tell anyone."

"Maybe he was jealous," Sam said casually.

Kurt's eyes widened for a moment before he could mask the surprise at hearing the question. "Why would you say that?"

"Kurt, you've been spending a lot of time with Finn lately, and now I know the reason why, but..."

Kurt stood up abruptly from the bed. "I don't know why you think that Puck would be jealous but you're mistaken, alright?" He turned around and went upstairs ignoring Sam calling his name. He went into the kitchen and leaned against the counter taking deep breaths. He was scared that Sam had figured something out and that Puck would get angry with him. Then he shook his head, Sam didn't know what he was talking about, because in order to feel jealous, you should care about someone and Puck didn't give a damn about what Kurt did or who for that matter. He just needed to calm himself down and not act like he was hiding a big secret.

He reached into the pocket of his sweatpants and took out his phone. Puck hadn't called yet and he was pretty sure that he wasn't going to show up. With a sigh, he started heading towards the basement, but a wave of nausea hit him and he had to run to the bathroom.

After emptying his stomach, he remained sitting on the tiled floor for a few minutes. He guessed that Rachel or Mercedes were keeping the others away and he was glad for that. He didn't want to be around people when his emotions were running so wildly. After what felt like hours to him, Kurt finally got up and went in the living room. He briefly considered going back down in the basement, but he was feeling tired and his head was aching, so he laid down on the couch and closed his eyes letting the sleep flew over him.


	7. Life Effect

**Chapter Words Count: 6663**  
**Story Words Count: 41910**

**_A/N: I sooooooo didn't expect for this chapter to turn into a NC-17. But I guess Kurt and Puck just reeeeeeally wanted some alone time!_  
**

* * *

**Love Lies Bleeding - Chapter 6 - Life Effect**  
_Sorry, but I've got to go_  
_ The birth was quick but the death was slow_  
_There was so much I didn't now_  
_And so we disconnect_  
_The room goes quiet around us_  
_It's called the life effect_  
_Will it always surround us_  
_  
_

Kurt woke up to the sensation of fingers sliding through his hair. He blinked his eyes open and tried to see in the darkness of the room but all he could make out was someone sitting on the edge of the couch stroking his hair. It felt familiar and he instantly knew who that someone was.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, his voice still groggy from the sleep.

"I thought this was for the glee club."

Kurt sighed and pulled himself up into a sitting position. "Why did you hit Finn?"

Puck's hand, that was now cupping his cheek, stilled. Kurt slid his fingers around Puck's wrist to keep his hand into place. "Puck?"

"I wanted to hit him. Why do you care?"

Puck's words sounded accusing and Kurt frowned in confusion. However, before he could ask anything, Puck freed his hand and turned away.

"I just got here, it's barely eleven and they're all already asleep. Bunch of sissies."

Kurt rolled his eyes and couldn't help but smile. "I'm happy you're here," he said quietly after a moment, becoming serious again.

"Hey, free booze, how could I stay away?"

"Right." Sighing heavily, Kurt shook his head. "Why did you sing that song at glee? You've been avoiding me so I never asked and..."

"I wasn't avoiding you. You, on the other hand, were always with Berry or Hudson."

Kurt didn't miss the hate put into saying Finn's name. Frowning, he asked, "Ok, what the hell happened with Finn?"

Puck didn't answer and after a few minutes, Kurt gave in to the desire of touching the boy he loved because after all, he knew that they didn't talk about feelings. They never brought them up and if they did, it was always a slip. So asking about the song Puck had sang in Glee was useless, and Kurt knew that, he just couldn't stop himself from asking. Maybe they should have talked about Kurt being jealous of Santana, or Puck hitting Finn out of the blue, or Kurt falling in love with Puck and Puck pulling away, but talking wasn't them.

He reached out, slid his hand along Puck's neck and kneeled behind Puck until he had one thigh resting on either side of his lover's waist. Then he slid his arms around Puck's neck and then down, until he was hugging Puck's back. He rested his forehead against the back of Puck's neck and took a deep breath of his scent.

"I miss you," he said, quietly, his words a breath that caressed the heated skin of his lover.

Abruptly, Puck turned around, his hands sliding under Kurt's thighs to grip him strongly, to push Kurt up against his body until Kurt had his legs wrapped around Puck's waist. His hands slid under Kurt's t-shirt and Kurt felt the touch set his soul on fire.

He attacked his mouth pulling Puck in for a bruising kiss. His arms wound around his lover's neck, tightening their hold. He pulled back, gasping for air, "Can't go downstairs."

Puck bit Kurt's lower lip before asking, "Your dad home?"

Shaking his head, he replied, "Fishing trip."

Puck's hands squeezed Kurt's ass and he moaned loudly, uncaring of his friends sleeping down in his room.

"Ok."

Kurt knew that in any other occasion he would have told Puck to put him down and to go out so they could go fuck in one of their cars, but he was missing Puck, his kisses, his touch on his skin, the sliding of their bodies together, and his hormones were driving him mad so he didn't stop to think that he was going to have sex with his secret-lover in his father's bedroom because he was feeling like time was running out and he had to hold onto that moment, on Puck kissing down his neck, sucking his skin into a mark, his hands gripping tightly his waist while he tried to get them to Burt's bedroom.

He wanted to feel Puck's hands trembling against his skin, the desperation the boy he loved was feeling to have him and Kurt really didn't care about anything else.

Once they reached Burt's bedroom that Kurt had pointed to vaguely without pulling his mouth away from Puck's collarbone, Puck kicked the door shut and pushed Kurt up against it.

Puck's hands tightened around Kurt's hips as he pushed him up against the door hearing Kurt whimpering half in pain and half in lust. He squeezed his eyes shut when Kurt's fingers dug into his shoulders. If he was a different type of guy, Puck could have said that every kiss, every touch, every breath tasted like good bye, but he was Puck the badass so he shut down his emotions, grabbed Kurt's ass to ensure that he wouldn't fall when he stepped back from the door and turned around, pushing him down on the bed.

Then, he took the lube and condom from the pocket of his jacket, tossed them down on the bed and slid off his jacket and kicked away his shoes before kneeling on the bed between Kurt's spread legs.

"You look like a slut," he said, chuckling. "Never thought I'd get you to fuck on..."

Kurt pushed himself up and grabbed Puck's face between his hands and kissed him to cut him off. He didn't want to get laid by the stupid jackass, he wanted his Puck, the one that at least for the length of the sex would care for him. He pulled back after a few moments and whispered, "Be gentle."

Neither one of them did anything for long moments, and then Kurt felt Puck's hand on his waist, sliding under his t-shirt to help him slid it off. Then he let Kurt unbutton his shirt slowly, while he hooked his thumbs into Kurt's sweatpants' waistband. Kurt slid his shirt off of his shoulders and then he started kissing Puck again while with his hands he unbuttoned Puck's jeans and slid down the zip slowly. He heard Puck moaning in his mouth and he felt himself harden even more. When he felt Puck's arms sliding around his waist, Kurt let Puck push him down on the bed until he was lying on his back. Puck slid down his jeans and then pushed Kurt's sweatpants off of him before spreading himself on top of his lover.

His mouth started laving kisses down Kurt's neck and then down, across his chest. He bit on Kurt's nipples and felt himself growing impossibly hard when Kurt's fingers slid through the short hair of his mohawk grazing at the skin with his nails. He spread Kurt's legs and settled between them, leaving a trail of hot kisses along his inner thigh; the air would cool his saliva making Kurt shiver and moan.

When Puck's tongue licked the head of Kurt's cock, Kurt bit down hard on his lower lip because part of his brain was still lucid enough to remember that he couldn't scream like he normally would do when they were alone since their friends were in his basement.

Puck's fingers kneaded Kurt's thighs while his mouth closed around the tip of Kurt's cock and started sucking. He reached blindly for the lube he had tossed somewhere on the bed while his eyes fixed on Kurt's face. For a moment, he wondered if Finn was able of melting Kurt like this and the jealousy that surged inside him made him squeeze Kurt's thighs and suck harder.

"No-Noah," Kurt moaned, his voice husky from the pleasure.

And Puck told himself to be happy to have Kurt in this moment, writhing underneath him thinking only about him. When he had sang at Glee Club, he had only did it because he was feeling as if his emotions could overwhelm him because he was feeling so much when it was never supposed to mean anything. He had just felt the need to let some of those feelings out in the open so he could breath again.

He had no intention of coming out and he was glad that he hadn't done it because now that Kurt was carrying Finn's child, he would have looked like a fool if people would have known about him and Kurt. There were times when he wanted to tell Kurt that he mattered, but those were the times when he'd be cold towards Kurt and instead go looking for Santana because that was easier than having to stop and try to figure out what he was starting to feel.

He felt Kurt's nails scratch at the back of his head and he focused back on what he was doing. Opening the lube, he coated his fingers and started circling Kurt's opening. He heard Kurt's moans getting louder and he pushed his index finger inside feeling Kurt relax and accept him.

He moved his finger in and out a few times before adding a second one.

"Noah, need you..." Kurt moaned starting to writhe more under Puck's touch.

Puck inserted a third finger and then swallowed Kurt's dick to the hilt. Kurt arched against him, and he came with a loud moan that Puck wondered how the guys downstairs could not hear. He pulled his fingers out and used the back of his hand to wipe away the cum that had overflown from his lips. Then he stretched over Kurt and brought their mouths together in a languid kiss that felt like passion and love more than lust and sex.

Kurt slid his arms under Puck's and trailed his fingers down his lover's back. "Noah," he said huskily when they broke apart to breath. His eyes found Puck's and he looked deep into those hazel eyes for long moments before Puck blinked and looked away, reaching for the condom.

Kurt was still feeling the aftershocks of his orgasm in his body but he wanted more, he wanted Puck inside him. So he let Puck pull back enough to slide on the condom and then Kurt felt Puck's hands sliding under his legs to guide them around his waist before Puck started to guide himself inside Kurt.

Kurt moaned when the head of Puck's dick slid inside him and he used his feet to push Puck forward while he pulled one hand away from Puck's back and reached for Puck's hand to entwine their fingers. He let his eyes open, focused on Puck's face but Puck had his eyes closed and the hand Kurt was holding squeezed his tightly. Then, Puck thrust all the way in and Kurt squeezed him. Puck's mouth dropped open in a silent moan and Kurt lifted his head up and kissed him. Puck jolted and he started moving again. He pulled out until only the head of his dick was inside and then drove forward.

Kurt arched underneath him, throwing his head back and exposing his neck to the assault of Puck's mouth. His fingers dug into Puck's back and he started pushing down to meet Puck's thrusts.

Puck's hands slid down Kurt's sides and when they reached his waist, they gripped hard so when Puck pulled himself back to sit on his heels, Kurt went with him. The new position made Puck go in deeper and Kurt couldn't help the loud moan that escaped him. He put his hands on Puck's shoulders to steady himself before he started pushing up and down on Puck's dick.

Puck slid one arm around Kurt's waist to pull him flush against him and used the hand still gripping Kurt's hip to guide his thrusts. Starting to go harder and faster with each thrust, it didn't take them long to get close to the edge. Puck let go of Kurt's hip and started to jerk him off in time with his thrusts. Then, Kurt came and squeezed the orgasm out of Puck.

They stood sitting in the center of the bed for a few moments, their foreheads resting together and their breaths mingled. They'd had passionate sex, but this time it had felt different. Kurt was feeling connected to Puck and Puck was feeling that same sensation that would make him run away starting to spread inside, like he was feeling too much too soon.

"I don't think I can feel my legs anymore," Kurt said before chuckling softly. He stole a chaste kiss from Puck before pulling back slowly and Puck went down with him still inside him. He squeezed his eyes shut, slid his arms around Puck's neck and kept him there, prolonging their connection.

Finally Puck pulled out, throwing the condom on the floor before lying down next to Kurt. He laid there quietly for a while, just staring up at the ceiling. He felt Kurt's fingers slid through his and taking his hand to put it on his belly. He didn't know why Kurt did it, but it was enough to break whatever spell had been over them while they were having sex. He pulled his hand away, angrily and with venom, he asked, "So, got yourself knocked up, didn't you?"

Kurt's eyes widened and the bliss from his orgasm disappeared so fast that it felt like it wasn't even there in the first place. "W-What?"

"You heard me. I said, you got yourself knocked up." Puck sneered crudely. "I hope Hudson was a good lay at least."

It took Kurt a moment to catch up on what Puck had said. He turned on his side and looked at Puck even though the boy was staring up at the ceiling. "What?"

"Are you having trouble understanding English, Hummel? Well, I did fuck you thoroughly."

"How can you said that, Puck?"

"You always had your pathetic little crush on him. I wonder what finally convinced him of banging you." Then, Puck finally turned around to look at Kurt, but his eyes were cold and his voice derisory. "I bet you're happy now," Puck hissed, scooting closer so he could talk right in Kurt's ear. "You finally got what you wanted didn't you? I bet you're making plans with Hudson about your perfect family. And to think that you used to tell me that you weren't fucking around." He laughed again and the sound tore at Kurt's heart.

"Stop," Kurt said, his voice broken and unsteady. He turned around so he could look into Puck's eyes. "Stop," he repeated. "I won't let you talk like that. And I..." he trailed off and sighed trying to keep his tears in check.

Having people at school thinking that if Finn was being gentle with him could only be because he knocked him up, was awful enough, but to think that Puck would actually believe those rumors and be so cruel to him, was making him hurt more than anything else.

He looked away from Puck and asked, "That's why you hit, Finn, isn't it? You believed those stupid rumors and..."

"I saw you in the bathroom that day," he cut Kurt off. "After you left class because you were feeling sick, I went looking for you and I found you talking with Hudson about your precious baby."

"No matter what you may think you saw or heard, this kid is not Finn's. And if you don't believe that I'm carrying your son, then why are you even here? Why do you think I owe you an explanation? And what right did you have to hit Finn?"

Puck told himself that he had got that Kurt was pregnant that really wasn't a surprise, but hearing Kurt saying it, made it different. He froze for a moment without even thinking about Kurt denying Finn's paternity. Then, just because he wanted Kurt hurting as much as he was hurting in that moment, he said, "Maybe it's not Hudson's. Maybe you don't even know who the father is."

Kurt sat up and clenched the sheets in his hands to stop himself from hitting the other boy. "Why are you saying these things?"

Puck didn't answer, instead, he just laid there staring at Kurt's back. He felt the hurt in Kurt's words but couldn't stop himself.

"What is your fucking problem? I never slept with anyone but you and you know that, dammit!" He tried to calm himself down because one thing was getting worked up because of the sex, and another thing was getting agitated because of a fight. "If I got myself knocked up, it was because of you." He felt tears welling up in his eyes and he bit on his lower lip to stop himself from letting out a sob.

"Sorry, I'm not buying it." Puck's voice was cold and made something inside Kurt froze.

"I don't wish this baby was Finn's, because that would mean wishing for this baby to be different from who he is, but it would be easier if he was Finn's. I wouldn't have to tell my kid that his father thought I was a slut and he wasn't his. I didn't tell you, because you made it clear that you didn't want anything to do with me beside sex. And don't worry about your precious reputation. You can rest assured that I won't go around telling people that the kid is yours."

Kurt got out of the bed; his back turned to Puck while his arms wounded around his waist.

"You can go and forget all about me." When he spoke, he actually managed to sound detached and he was happy about it. "You always said it was all about sex so yeah maybe I'm lying and I slept with a bunch of guys or maybe I only ever slept with you, but it doesn't matter now. There's really no need for you to stick around since I got myself knocked up and won't put out for you anymore." He grabbed his pants and slid them on.

"What if I wanted to see the kid?" And Puck really didn't know why he was asking because he knew what he had seen in that bathroom and whether Kurt admitted that the kid was Finn's or not, he wasn't going to believe otherwise.

Kurt laughed humorlessly. "You don't even think it's yours. Now, get the hell out of here and leave us alone." He started walking towards the bathroom managing not to break down until he reached it. He barely managed to reach the toilet before he was puking.

He felt the door of the bedroom slumming shut signaling that Puck had probably left and he just sat there with his forehead against his knees unable to even cry. He didn't know how long later it was when he heard someone knocking on the door. It sounded distant so whoever it was, was probably knocking on the bedroom's door and not on the bathroom's.

"Kurt? Kurt it's me, Rachel. Are you sleeping?" The knocking started again. "I saw Puck leaving. Are you ok?"

Getting to his feet felt like a burden to Kurt, but he managed to get up and walk to the door. He pulled it open just a crack because he didn't want Rachel to see the state the bed was in and figure out that he had just had sex on his father's bed. He cleared his throat before speaking, but considering how comically Rachel's eyes widened, he didn't look too good. "I'm ok."

"Kurt..." She shook her head and pushed open the door. Kurt thought about pushing her away, but he was tired, so he moved aside, let her inside and then closed the door again. She glanced at the bed but didn't say anything and Kurt was actually surprised.

"What are you doing up here?"

"Everyone's sleeping but I went to the kitchen to get some water and saw Puck leaving." She glanced back at the bed once again. "I take it that you didn't talk much."

Kurt gave a bitter laugh. "Oh we did talk. He called me a slut that sleeps around. Said that he didn't believe the kid was his, he thinks it's Finn's and then took that back and said that I probably don't even know who's the father."

"Oh Kurt, I'm so sorry." She walked up to him and made a move to hug him but Kurt stepped back and held up his hands.

"I'm covered in saliva, sweat and cum. I hope you don't mind if I don't let you hug me."

Rachel nodded and sighed again. "I guess we better change the sheets." She frowned and her lips curved into that grimace of anger she used to wear so often a while back. "I can't believe he'd say something like that and about you and his best friend."

"The other day I was sick and Finn came looking for me in the bathroom. We started talking about the baby and then Finn asked me to touch my belly. Puck was outside and saw everything. I just..." he shook his head. "I just thought he'd ask me about it before jumping to conclusions, but I guess now it doesn't matter anymore."

"So it's over?"

Kurt shrugged and turned away, picking his t-shirt from the floor and sliding it on. Then he stopped for a moment remembering the condom. He kneeled on the floor and looked under the bed. He sighed and with a grimace on his face, reached out and picked it up. "I can't throw this away in here." With his free hand, he got the sheets off of the bed and hid the condom inside to dispose of it once he had put the sheets in the dumpster. "I just needed a little push in the right direction," he answered to Rachel.

"I'm sorry, I thought you were wrong with not wanting to tell him, Kurt."

"Doesn't matter, Rachel." He picked clean sheets from the wardrobe and started making the bed. "I'm happy my father only has white sheets. It makes this easier."

"Never thought Kurt Hummel would have sex with his clandestine lover on his father's bed," Rachel said, laughing, trying to lighten the mood but Kurt didn't smile and she started to get worried. "Are you sure you're ok, Kurt? I guess it's something stupid to ask, but..."

"I'm ok, thanks. I knew I wasn't going to get a family with the boy I loved." He shrugged. "I guess you could say this was a wake up call."

Silently, Rachel walked to the other side of the bed and helped Kurt finish changing the sheets.

"So, is everybody sleeping on the floor?"

"Yeah. We were drinking and playing when we started falling asleep."

"Why aren't you drunk?" Kurt asked her suddenly.

Rachel shrugged. "I didn't want to pass out like everyone else in case you needed anything."

Kurt smiled, it was a little smile, but a smile nonetheless. "I never thought I'd say this, but you're being a great friend, Rachel, thank you."

She beamed at him before walking over and hugging him despite Kurt's earlier words about cum, sweat and saliva. "I'm glad you're letting me be there. So," she pulled back clapping her hands, "we can watch a movie or if you're tired, we can go back down in your room and get some sleep. No one touched your bed."

"Glad to know that. I don't think I could actually sleep now, so would you mind keeping me company?"

"Not at all."

Kurt disposed of the dirty sheets and the condom and then they went down in the living room. Kurt settled down on the couch again and let Rachel chose the movie. Then she sat down next to him and they started to silently watch the screen. It wasn't a lot later when Rachel felt Kurt's head leaning on her shoulder and she didn't say anything. She bit down on her lower lip worriedly and had to stop herself from going over at Puck's to try and get some sense in that mohawked head of his.

The next day, when everybody else woke up, Rachel and Kurt were making breakfast so no one had any clue of what had happened during the night even though they could all see that Kurt looked even more sadder than he did before the sleepover started.

While they were having breakfast, Burt came back home and the glee club members left after a while. Kurt could feel Sam's eyes linger on him while they all ate breakfast and he stopped himself from meeting that gaze fearing what he could find in those blue eyes. Kurt waved goodbye every one of his friend but couldn't help but feel nervous when Sam stopped for a moment on the door looking at him like he wanted to say something. In the end, Sam sighed and shook his head and murmured a distracted, "See you at school," before leaving and Kurt was relieved.

"So, did you have fun?" Burt asked Kurt while he poured himself a cup of coffee.

"Not so much. They were all drinking and eating junk food, not exactly something I could do. I watched a movie with Rachel."

"At least you weren't alone."

"Yeah. I'm going to go grab a shower, ok?"

Burt watched him go worriedly.

*GLEE*

Monday at school was hard. Wherever Kurt went, people would point at him and he could hear people talking in hushed tones. He was on his way to French when someone grabbed his arm. He felt instant fear running up his arm when the grip tightened his hold. He looked up and found Karofsky.

"What's up, homo? Got a bun in the oven?"

Kurt tried to free his arm from the jock's grasp but it was useless. He knew that he was about to be shoved into the lockers and he couldn't let that happen. "Don't do anything stupid, Karofsky."

"Like what? Shove you in the lockers? I think that there's a dumpster with your name on it. Now I'm going to..."

Before Karofsky could finish his sentence, he was grabbed by the back of his letterman jacket and yanked back. "Stay away, Karofsky."

Kurt's eyes widened when he saw Puck pushing Karofsky away.

"What's up with you? What do you care?"

"You know what? If you push Kurt and he looses his baby, you go to jail. Do you want to go there and get your dream of being someone's bitch come true?"

Karofsky looked challenging at Puck for a few moments trying to decide if what he was saying was true or not. Finally, he held his hands up in surrender. "I'm going to check and if I don't risk getting in jail, I'm going to come back and beat you both." Then he turned around spitting one last rude homophobic comment at them before leaving.

Kurt looked at Puck and honestly didn't know what to say. Ever since Puck had joined glee, he had stopped torturing Kurt even though he had now started again for reasons Kurt still didn't know. But even when Puck left him alone, he still never did anything to ensure Kurt's safety and he thought that that was never going to happen.

In the end, he managed to say a weak, "Thank you."

Puck looked at him without saying anything. He just stood there staring right at Kurt and Kurt wanted almost to believe that things between them could change but then Puck said, "It was a one time thing. You better keep Hudson glued to your side." Then he turned around and started walking down the halls.

Kurt closed his eyes and leaned against the lockers. It was getting so much harder to keep going and he felt himself on the verge of giving up, just going home, curling under his covers and never leave that safe haven.

When the bell rang, he made himself go to class even though it was the last thing he wanted.

*GLEE*

Kurt's steps echoed through the empty halls. Glee practice wasn't that day and everyone had already gone home. The young soprano had stayed at school because he was tutoring a freshman in French and after a pit stop to the bathroom because his bladder was practically non-existent, he was now on his way to the parking lot.

He had managed to convince Finn to go over at Rachel's so they could have some alone time and Mercedes wasn't at school that day, so he had been without his bodyguards for the last couple of hours but football practice wasn't on so he was pretty sure that he was safe or at least, he hadn't let himself freak out yet.

While he was walking by the choir room, a soft voice caught his attention. He neared the door and looked inside, finding Sam sitting on a stool quietly playing his guitar with his back turned to the door. Without making a sound, Kurt leaned against the wall and listened to him sing.

_Baby I just don't get it  
Do you enjoy being hurt?  
I know you smelled the perfume, the make-up on his shirt  
You don't believe his stories  
You know that they're all lies  
Bad as you are, you stick around and I just don't know why_

_If I was your man  
Never worry 'bout  
I'd be coming home  
Every night, doin' you right._

_Baby you're a star._

_You should let me love you  
Let me be the one to give you everything you want and need  
Baby good love and protection  
Make me your selection  
Show you the way love's supposed to be  
Baby you should let me love you, love you, love you._

_Your true beauty's description looks so good that it hurts  
You're a dime plus ninety-nine and it's a shame  
Don't even know what you're worth  
Everywhere you go they stop and stare  
Cause you're bad and it shows  
From your head to your toes, Out of control, baby you know._

_You deserve better boy  
We should be together boy  
With me and you it's whatever boy, hey!  
So can we make this thing ours? _

_Let me love you that's all you need baby... _

Sam blew the last chord and slapped his hand on the sound hole. "Damn it," he swore under his breath.

"I loved it," Kurt said quietly. He gulped and took a few steps towards the quarterback stopping when he noticed Sam's back stiffening. "I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come inside but..." he sighed. "It was good."

Sam put the guitar down and turned around. His blue eyes locked with Kurt's blue-green ones while he desperately tried not to let his emotions show. He didn't say anything but took a step toward the soprano.

"So, huh," Kurt looked around nervously and cleared his throat a little. "Who are you planning to sing that to?"

"He just heard it."

The words hang in the air filling the silence of the room. Kurt's eyes widened a little. "Why..."

"I see how you look at Puck." Sam turned his back to him and walked back over to his guitar to put it back in its case. He sighed a little. "I guess the baby it's his." This time he glanced over his shoulder and looked straight at Kurt daring him to lie about it.

Kurt lowered his head and crossed his hands above his stomach. "Yes." His voice was barely a whisper.

Sam turned around then, and stalked up to Kurt. "Why would you go to bed with someone like that? I..." the blond shook his head. "Is he going to help you raise the baby?"

Kurt shook his head and when his eyes locked once again with the other boy's, they were watery. "He doesn't believe it's his and we've never told anyone that we were having sex and I can't oblige him to help me because if the school knew that he knocked me up, they would never leave him alone and..." a sob cut his words off and Sam did the only thing he could think of and put his arms around Kurt pulling him up against his body.

Kurt hugged him back tightly, his hands fisting the hoodie of the blond jock. He buried his face in the crook of his neck and felt Sam's arms tighten around him. He was always so sad lately, that the littlest thing could make him burst into tears.

"Shh, I've got you." Sam voice was soothing and soft and barely audible, but it still managed to cut through Kurt's sobs and comfort him. "I won't tell anyone."

"Than-thank you."

"But you have to let me help you, ok?"

Kurt pulled away a little and looked confused into Sam's clear blue eyes. In the end, with a frown, he asked, "How could you help me?"

"I will protect you, walk you to class, be sure that you and junior are safe. I have some classes with you when Finn doesn't so I can help you when he can't." He pushed a fallen lock behind Kurt's ear and smiled at him.

"I can't let you do that." Kurt disentangled himself from the quarterback's arms and took a step backwards. "I've already dragged Finn along and they think the baby is his. If I let you help me, they're going to think that it's yours and..."

"Let them think whatever they want."

"I can't do this to yourself. Finn is doing it because our parents are together but you don't have any reasons to help me like this."

"Kurt..." he reached out and his right hand closed around the brunette's cheek.

"That song," Kurt glanced away for a moment. "You..."

"I love you," Sam whispered, quietly, remorsefully.

Kurt lowered his eyes, wishing for a moment that he could return the sentiment, that he could feel what he felt for Noah, for Sam, for someone that actually cared about him... that loved him... but he had fallen in love with Puck long before Sam got in the picture and he couldn't simply talk himself into loving one boy instead of another. "I can't do that to you, Sam. It'd be like hell because I can't..." he trailed off for a moment, taking a deep breath and a step back. "I can't love you back."

"I know. That was what that song was about." Taking one step closer, Sam closed the little space left between them and framed Kurt's face with his calloused hands. "And because you won't let me love you, let me help you, please. You're not asking me anything, I'm offering." His eyes slid down over the boy's slightly parted lips. He swallowed the lump that was forming in his throat knowing that he could never taste those lips, explore that mouth, say "I love you" and hear it back. The hurt he felt in that moment, was almost unbearable. He forced himself to raise his gaze locking his eyes with Kurt's. He tried to smile a little, "I won't take no as an answer."

"Sam, I..."

"Just say yes? Please?"

Kurt studied Sam for long moments. Sam was looking at him with honesty and he could see how strong the feelings Sam had for him were. "I guess I'll owe you one for the rest of my life, then." His voice was weak and unsteady but he felt the hands cupping his cheeks squeezing for a moment and let himself bask in the new feeling of having someone loving him.

Sam bit down on his lower lip to stop himself from closing the gap between them and kiss the boy standing so close to him. "Thank you," he finally whispered. And all he wanted in that moment, was a kiss he knew he'd never get.

*GLEE*

Puck was frustrated. Wherever he looked, he saw Kurt with Finn or with Sam. He wanted to yell at them to leave him alone because Kurt was his and his alone, but those feelings were irrational and he had kissed goodbye his chance of being with Kurt that night of the sleepover a week before.

He was on his way to Glee when he spotted Mercedes and Finn walking together. Kurt wasn't in sight so he was probably with Sam or with Rachel because lately, Kurt never went anywhere alone and Puck got that. The jocks were out for blood and he was pretty sure that the pregnancy wouldn't be enough to stop them even though Karofsky now knew that Puck had been right about jail if they killed Kurt's baby.

It wasn't like he was spying on them because he was walking down the hall and he wasn't hiding behind anything and if Mercedes and Finn didn't want people to hear them, then they should have choose another place to talk.

"I'm worried about him," Finn said.

Mercedes sighed heavily and nodded. "Yeah, so am I. He looks depressed and I think it has something to do with the baby's dad."

"He doesn't even want to tell me who the guy is and maybe he's right because I could beat that asshole for treating him like that."

"The only thing he told me, was that they weren't together, that it was just sex and that the boy is in the closet and he'd never out anyone in this town."

Puck froze in his tracks and didn't hear anything else. Now he knew that the kid wasn't Finn's and maybe he was still right and Kurt was sleeping with someone else, but now he was feeling the fear of having lost something more important than he had figured out. Something was telling him that he should have listened to Kurt when he had said that the baby was his and not Finn's or anyone else's for that matter.

He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes feeling the worst he had ever felt before in his life.

* * *

_**A/N**: I wanted to wait before posting this, but I won't be able to update for a while because of school so yeah I thought to leave you with the new chapter right away. I'm so frigging nervous about this because you amazing people that are reading and reviewing this story (THANK YOU SO MUCH BY THE WAY) weren't expecting this, but I wrote this story just to get to this scene between Kurt and Puck so I had to write this like that but don't worry because there's always light at the end of the tunnel it's just that I don't know, Puck thought the kid was Finn's so he couldn't just trust Kurt but he's going to regret it, he's already regretting it and I do hope you will enjoy this chapter even thoug it's probably not what you were expecting!_


	8. From Where You Are

**Chapter 7 - From Where You Are**  
_So far away from where you are_  
_ These miles have torn us worlds apart_  
_ And I miss you, yeah, I miss you _

Kurt closed his locker and was startled when he turned around and found Sue standing too close.

"Lady Face," Sue greeted him with her scowl firmly in place and her tone of 'I'm talking with you so make my time worth it.'

"Coach Sylvester." He had never been really scared of Sue, and he was actually quite confident that if the woman didn't try to insult him like she did with pretty much every one else, was in part because of that.

"You've been skipping practice and a certain rumor has got to my ears." Sue shook her head and narrowed her eyes. "You know, I've always said that this establishment we like to call school was full of sneaky gays and now that I have the proof, I need to know who knocked you up, Lady Face."

Kurt crossed his arms in front of his chest. "With all due respect, Coach, that's really none of your business."

Sue got closer but Kurt simply raised an eyebrow. "No one skips practice, so, if you want to keep your spot on the team, you will tell me who is the sneaky gay."

"I can't be a cheerleader anymore. I was just figuring out a way to let you know, but now that that's been taken care of, I guess we can just go back to ignoring each other."

Sue took a step backwards. "You can't quit Cheerios. Nobody quits Cheerios and surely not my head Cheerleader."

"Quinn is the head cheerleader, Coach."

"I can throw her off of the team, just say the word."

Kurt rolled his eyes and gripped the strap of his shoulder bag. "I can't be on the team and honestly, that's the last thing I want to do right now. I'm sorry I let you down Coach. You gave me a chance when no one else did, and I'm grateful for that, but..."

"Do I look like I'm going to cry because you want to quit?" Sue snorted and crossed her arms. "If you want to have a heart to heart conversation, go find William." She looked at him from head to toes with a glare. "You won't get a second chance, Lady Face."

"Can you stop calling me that? It's degrading. I'm a boy and I find it offensive when you call me that."

"Sorry, this is high school for you, Lady Face. Names you don't want thrown your way. It will only get harder for you in the real world." With a last disgusted look, Sue started walking down the halls.

"I meant it, Coach, I quit!" Kurt yelled after her and saw Sue closing her hands into tight fists. He turned around and collided right into someone. He stumbled backwards but strong hands grabbed his shoulders and steadied him. He looked up into a pair of soft hazel eyes and for a moment, he didn't know what to say. When Puck didn't let him go, he cleared his throat and stepped back trying to ignore him, for a moment Puck held onto his shoulders before letting him go. "Sorry, I didn't see you."

"You ok?"

For a brief moment, Kurt almost smiled at him to reassure him that everything was fine but then his words the night of the sleepover came back in his mind and he simply nodded and gave a cold, "Yes."

Then he turned around and walked away.

When he turned the corner, he found Sam walking his way. He tried to smile but it didn't really work out and Sam looked at him worriedly.

"What happened?"

"Nothing. Let's go to class." He slid his arm through Sam's and let the boy talk about the football game on Friday, thankful of not being pressured to say what was wrong.

*GLEE*

Seeing Kurt with Sam or Finn hurt. Sometimes Puck could almost go as far as to say that it physically hurt, like a punch to the stomach. However, all he could do was sit back and watch because it was all his own fault. He had tried to repress that doubt in his mind that Kurt's baby could be his and he couldn't even decide if it was going to be worse finding out that it was his and he had fucked up, or finding out that the baby wasn't his and that Kurt had lied to him. But still, despite not wanting to address that doubt, there was a part of him that knew that he couldn't just push Kurt out of his mind as easily as he liked to think.

His eyes following Kurt whenever he stepped into a room, it was something that he couldn't even control just like he couldn't get his heart to stop hurting at how much he just wanted to be able to touch him.

There had been times in the past when Kurt and he had fought and they had gone for a week without having sex, but now a month had passed since the last time they had been together and Kurt wouldn't even look at him for more than a few seconds and only when it was strictly necessary. Puck was pretty sure that there was no way to fix things between them this time and he hated himself a little bit more every day for it.

He closed his locker and picked up his bag from the bench. The locker room was almost empty, the only guys still there were Azimio, Karofsky, Puck and Finn. Ever since hitting his best friend, Puck hadn't talked with Finn anymore and being in Glee was starting to be unbearable. Kurt would sit on his own, closing pretty much everyone out and Sam would glare at Puck most of the time. Puck wondered why Kurt had told him that they had been together and the only reason he could come up with, was that evidently, Kurt was now with Sam.

Every time they were at Glee, Puck couldn't stop looking at Kurt, at the way he was starting to show, how he'd sit with his hands on his belly and a small smile on his face. Sometimes, when Rachel and Mr. Schue were too focused on another one of their arguments, Puck would catch Kurt humming softly, staring at his stomach.

"We could just throw him in the dumpster when Evans and Hudson aren't around."

Karofsky's voice caught Puck's attention. He narrowed his eyes and listened to the jock talking.

"Good luck with finding him alone," Azimio said.

"He tutors freshmen in French on Thursdays."

"Man, are you stalking him?"

"I'm just trying to figure out a good time to get him alone so we can have some fun."

"I'd like to beat him up too or throw him in the dumpster, but you know what Puckerman said. What if he loses the kid?"

"Who cares about that anyway? Fucking faggot got himself knocked up, so what?"

Puck's hands closed into tight fists and he could feel the rage building up inside him, making him blind.

"I say, we wait for him and we get him. Maybe we could break his arm or something. We don't have to hit him in the stomach if you're so afraid of getting sent to juvie," Karofsky said before sniggering.

Without even realizing he was doing it, Puck dropped his gym bag on the ground and rounded the row of lockers. He gripped Karofsky's t-shirt and slammed him up against the lockers making the boy hit his head against the metal.

"You stay away, Karofsky. I've already warned you once and if you don't want to spend the rest of the year in a fucking hospital bed eating through a straw, you better back off."

Karofsky's eyes widened when Puck's forearm started pressing down on his throat cutting off his supply of oxygen. Puck felt hands grabbing his t-shirt trying to pry him away from Karofsky, but Puck wasn't letting go. Karofsky started turning red from the lack of oxygen and Puck finally heard Finn's voice yelling.

"PUCK! PUCK DAMNIT LET HIM GO!"

Strong arms slid around his chest and pulled him back and it took him a moment to realize that it was Azimio who was holding him.

"STAY THE FUCK AWAY!" he yelled at Dave.

Karofsky slid down on the floor massaging his throat and Finn stepped in front of Puck with his hands held high. "Calm down, ok?"

Puck shrugged Azimio off and picked up his bag before walking out of the lockers. He was still feeling livid and ready to punch the wall. Maybe he had been a complete asshole to Kurt, and had tried to fool himself in not admitting that he cared, but he couldn't just stand aside and let people hurt Kurt or make him lose the baby, whether it was his or not. He heard someone running behind him and a moment later Finn was walking next to him.

"What the hell just happened?"

"He wanted to hurt Kurt," he said quickly, without thinking. He was still too upset to think about keeping his mouth shut.

Finn stopped walking and reached out a hand grabbing Puck's shoulder to stop him. "And you went all death star on him?"

"I..."

"You guys aren't even friends," Finn said suspiciously.

"We're in Glee," Puck said, finally recovering from his anger enough to think clearly.

"But you still threw him into dumpsters up until a month ago. What the hell is going on, Puck?"

The boys looked at one another without blinking. Puck wondered what would happen if he just told Finn the truth, but then he remembered that now Finn was more Kurt's friend than his, and telling him what had happened between him and Kurt, would end up with Finn punching him.

"Nothing is going on. He had it coming." He turned around and walked away leaving Finn behind staring at his retreating back.

When he walked outside, with the cold December sun shining brightly in the sky, Puck stopped for a moment to think about what he had just done. He knew for a fact that if Azimio hadn't been able to pull him off of Karofsky, he wouldn't have stopped. He had pushed Kurt away and it was all his damn fault, and now, all he could do was watching from afar and Finn wasn't there and he had felt the need to do something for Kurt even if it was stupid and could get him into trouble.

He went to his truck and drove home with the music filling the car and singing along to the lyrics of the cheesy rock songs so he could keep his mind away from wandering to yet another fuck up of his life. When he got his house, he was grateful to find it empty, his mother at work and his sister probably at a friend's.

Puck went in his room and threw himself down on the bed. He wondered if Finn would tell Kurt about the fight in the locker room and if Kurt would even care. He took his phone out and his thumb hovered over Kurt's speed dial for a long minute before he finally went to his contact list and called Santana.

He tried to lose himself in Santana's heated kisses but it didn't work. All his mind did, was keep pointing out the wrong things, turning his thought into an endless mantra of _girl-too dark-not soft enough-no love-no passion-I don't care about you, I want him...I lost him... _When he came, he kept his eyes closed and bit on his lower lip, hard, to stop himself from calling out Kurt's name.

*GLEE*

He was sitting outside Mrs. Pillsbury-Howell's office with no reason at all. He was supposed to head to his last period, but he shared that class with Sam and he had no intentions of sitting through an entire class with him. Football practice and glee were enough already.

He had no idea why he had stopped outside Mrs. Pillsbury-Howell's office since he had no intention of going in there and talking to that strange woman about what an asshole he was and how could he sort out the mess in his head.

He simply sat there and watched the counselor keep moving around the objects on her desk. It reminded him of when Kurt was upset about something and would arrange and re-arrange the stupid bottles on his vanity again and again (he carefully didn't choose to think about what it meant that he knew Kurt so well to know what he looked like upset or angry and for a moment, he wondered what a happy Kurt looked like, but he was pretty sure that he'd look like when he's staring at his stomach).

He was startled when someone sat down next to him on the little bench but when a shoulder touched his, he knew that it was Kurt even without turning around to look.

"Are you thinking of getting help?" Kurt tried to use a light tone but Puck didn't say anything. Kurt started fumbling with his car keys and that caught Puck's attention.

"Are you leaving?"

"Doctor's appointment. 16 week check-up." Kurt only said it because he was feeling the need to share it with Puck. He knew that Puck didn't care and he shouldn't care either, but he loved the boy and he couldn't help himself from sharing something about their baby, even if it was something so little, with him.

But Puck didn't answer. He lowered his gaze on the floor and when he spoke, his voice was cold. "What the hell do you want?"

"What's going on with you?" Kurt asked back.

"Fuck off."

"I don't get you. Finn told me that you almost killed Karofsky yesterday."

"Yeah well, Hudson should learn to keep his mouth shut."

Kurt sighed heavily already feeling exasperated. He had no intention of talking to Puck, but he had seen him looking so sad just staring at Mrs. Pillsbury-Howell, that he had found himself walking over to Puck before he could talk himself out of it.

"Why did you do it?"

It took Puck a minute to answer and when he finally did, his voice was void of emotions. "He wanted to come after you."

"He's always trying to come after me." He sighed. "Besides, I thought you said that you protecting me was a one time thing." Once again, he got no answer and Kurt really didn't want to fight, so he just let it go. After a month of avoiding Puck as much as he could because it hurt every time he thought about the things Puck had told him that last night they spent together, it was awkward to try and have a conversation with him.

"You could have gotten suspended again."

"Doesn't matter."

"It should," Kurt murmured quietly.

Puck just wanted for Kurt to leave because he couldn't stand to have him so close to him after everything that had happened, with all the doubts going around in his head. Listening to him talking about the baby, made him feel something that he didn't want to acknowledge, like hope for the future and love and the chance of being someone different and better.

"Thank you, by the way, for standing up for me even though you didn't have to. I'm always worried when I'm at school even with Sam and Finn being my shadows." He looked down at his belly and put his hands on the little bump.

Puck's eyes followed the movement but he didn't say anything. After a few moments of heavy silence, Kurt sighed and got up from the bench to leave. "I've got to go," he said even though he was sure that Puck wouldn't care whether he stayed or left.

"Are you with Sam?" Puck asked, having finally found his voice again. He didn't want to care about Kurt being with someone else, but he did and there was nothing he could do about it.

He thought that Kurt would answer him with a "_What do you care?_" or "_That's none of your business_," but when Kurt spoke, it was to say a simple, "No."

Puck looked up at him and held Kurt's piercing gaze even though he was feeling naked under that scrutiny. "Why?"

Kurt shrugged. "He loves me," he said and Puck looked away, his hands closing into tight fists and Kurt shook his head not understanding anymore what was going on through Puck's head. "And I respect him too much to be with him when I'm in love with someone else." He didn't say anything else but just turned around and left.

Puck just sat there, his head against the wall and his eyes watching Kurt walking away. He hated himself. He wanted answers. He got up and headed in a different direction.

*GLEE*

Rachel was adjusting her headband when the door to the bathroom opened and Puck stepped inside.

"Noah! What do you think you're doing? This is the girl's bathroom..."

"Shut up, Berry." He locked the door and turned to focus his attention on her. "I want some answers."

"You don't get to want anything." Rachel crossed her arms in front of her chest and looked sternly at Puck. "You don't get to ask about Kurt, ok? You were awful to him and I really want to slap you right now and kick you too."

"When did you become his fucking BFF?" he asked frustrated. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment to get a grip on his emotions. When he looked again at Rachel, he tried to look calmer. "You know whose kid it is?"

Rachel narrowed her eyes. "Of course I know it and let me tell you something, he didn't sleep with Finn, he didn't sleep with anyone but you and..."

"Why did he tell you?" Puck found himself asking. "You two always hate each other and..."

"We don't hate each other, Noah." Rachel unfolded her arms and her eyes softened a bit. "He really thought that you were going to let him explain."

"Explain what?"

Rachel shook her head. "Don't pretend that you don't know, alright? Why would you be here if you didn't want me to tell you what you already know?" She stepped closer and for a moment, she almost reached out with her hand but then she changed her mind, lowered her arm and her gaze.

"You want to know what I know? It's what you know too. I know that you two slept together for months," she lowered her voice to be sure that no one could hear them from the outside. "And that he loves you, like he told you, and I know that you broke him at the sleepover." She looked up at him with sadness in her eyes.

"Why did you tell him those hurtful things? He didn't tell anyone besides me and Sam who just figured it out on his own, he's going to let people call him a slut because he won't put you through what all of you put him through and what do you do? You go and call him a whore. You accuse him of sleeping with Finn and God knows who else because you're too afraid to actually be a man for once and stand up for him?"

Rachel closed her hands into tight fists and the need to punch Puck was rising in her again. "He loves you and I think sometimes he hates that he does and who could blame him? What did you want to hear, huh? That the kid is not yours? Well, sorry to disappoint you, but the baby is yours."

"How can you know? Just because he said so?"

Rachel laughed humorlessly. "Do you think that anyone in their right mind would say that you got them knocked up? If anyone needed to come up with a fake father for their baby, there are better options in this school than you." She straightened her back and put her hands on her hips. "Now, move aside and let me out. You shouldn't be talking with me, you should be begging Kurt to give you a second chance to be there for your baby."

Wordlessly, Puck stepped aside and let Rachel walk out of the bathroom. He was feeling so awful, like he had never stooped this low in his life. He saw the tears in Kurt's eyes when he had said that he didn't believe the kid was his, he saw the way Kurt smiled at his baby-bump even though he hated Puck and he couldn't help but feel like punching himself.

Then he finally got his mind around the fact that he was going to be a father, but that he was too chicken to be a dad to a little baby that had no faults. He had been feeling self-hatred a lot lately, but the moment where he understood that he had fucked up the best thing in his life, was the one moment when he hated himself more than he had ever before in the rest of his life.

*GLEE*

"All done, Kurt." Dr. Berry smiled kindly at him and Kurt pulled down the sleeve of his shirt and sat up on the plastic bed dandling his legs over the edge.

"I feel like you took gallons of blood," he joked.

Dr. Berry laughed. "It was for the blood work, and the blood sugar, because you may develop gestational diabetes. I will have the results for that in a few days but you can rest assured that everything is perfect. The heartbeat is steady and strong and the size of the fetus is perfectly normal so, hopefully, there aren't risks for birth defects."

Kurt nodded watching for a few minutes in silence while Dr. Berry put away the vials with his blood. "I was thinking, I'm pretty sure that it's going to be a boy, but when can I find out for sure?"

"Next month we will try and see." Dr. Berry sat down behind his desk and folded his hands on it before looking seriously at Kurt. "So, how are things going?"

Kurt shrugged and started staring at his boots while he dangled his legs. "Everything's ok. School is hard, but nothing I can't handle. Finn is helping me with the bullies along with another glee mate and I quit the Cheerios last month, so I'm stress free now. I still dance a little at Glee, but I stop before it gets too much." He rolled his eyes. "Actually, Rachel makes me stop when I start sweating."

Dr. Berry laughed. "She has taken looking after you very seriously."

"And I really appreciated it." Kurt looked at the man in front of him and smiled sincerely. "I never thought we could be friends, but she's been great lately, she's helping me a lot."

"I'm happy to hear that. You seem better. Some people develop depression during pregnancy and I feared that with your weight loss and down mood it meant that you were slipping into a depression, but it looks like you're better. Do you feel better?"

He thought about Puck and the first answer that came up in his mind was that no, he wasn't feeling any better, but every time thinking about Puck made him hurt, he thought about the baby growing inside him and that made it better. "Yeah, I'm doing better."

"Great. So, the other daddy is Jewish right?"

Kurt nodded and stood up from the bed and sat down at the desk.

"Okay, then we can do some other tests to check for common Jewish related things."

"Great."

*GLEE*

"Guys, alright, stop!" Mr. Schue sighed heavily and shook his head. "You're supposed to spin towards the right, not the left," he said to Finn and Sam. "Let's do it again."

Kurt was distracted fixing his own steps, so he didn't notice Sam spinning the wrong way until it was too late and he fell on the floor. "Damn," he swore when he landed on his butt.

In a moment, Finn and Puck were kneeling on either side of him asking if he was ok. He looked oodly at Puck before grabbing Finn's hand to get back on his feet. "I'm okay, guys, calm down."

"I'm so sorry, Kurt," Sam apologized.

"It's okay," he reassured him. His butt hurt a little, but it was a normal kind of pain. Then he saw Sam's eyes travel to his hand and narrow his eyes. Confused, Kurt followed the direction of Sam's gaze and realized that he was holding Puck's hand. He didn't even remember grabbing it in the first place but he stared at their joined hands for a few seconds longer before he quickly slid his out of Puck's. He didn't look at the boy when he turned around and asked Mr. Schue to be excused for the rest of practice.

"Yeah, sure, go home."

Kurt declined Finn and Sam's offers to drive him home and grabbing his things, he walked out of the choir room. He heard footsteps echoing behind him and turned around sure to find Sam. He was surprised when he found Puck.

"What are you doing?" he asked while Puck got closer.

"Karofsky said they were waiting to get you on your own so..."

"Puck what..."

"Let me walk you to the car, please?"

Kurt studied Puck's expression for a few seconds before his eyes traveled down to the boy's hands that were closed into fists. He looked nervous and Kurt could almost feel him vibrating with pent up emotions. "Noah, what is going on?"

Puck took a step closer and Kurt told himself not to step back. "Let me walk you to the car," he repeated.

Kurt shook his head. "I don't get you. I wish you'd just fucking talk to me." He felt anger suddenly raging inside him. He looked up at Puck and steadied himself. "One moment you insult me, then you ignore me and now you suddenly act like you care and..." he trailed off and turned around. "I don't need another bodyguard."

"Then let me do this for the kid."

Kurt froze. Puck's voice sounded vulnerable and he felt himself one step from caving in. "Whose kid?" he made himself ask. "Finn's? Sam's? Or the kid of a guy I met somewhere and let fuck me?" He felt more than heard Puck getting closer. He felt hot breath on the back of his neck and he closed his eyes willing himself to walk away but it was just so damn hard to keep staying away.

"Ours," Puck replied. His voice trembled and his hand found its way to Kurt's neck, relishing at the contact of the warm skin. He let his fingers slid through Kurt's hair but it only lasted for a moment though, then Kurt stepped out of reach.

"I told you that night to forget about us." He made himself walk away despite feeling his heart breaking a little bit more with each step.

* * *

**_A/N: I know that this was shorter than the last chapters, but don't worry, I already have the important scene of next chapter wrote down and I can't wait to make you guys read it, so I will try to update as soon as I can. I hope you enjoyed this in the meantime! _**


	9. Yesterday Is Over

**Chapter 8 - Yesterday Is Over**

_Guess that they don't know ya_  
_ Cause today_  
_ That was yesterday_  
_ Yesterday is over_  
_ It's a different day_

Finn rubbed his eyes trying to wake himself up. It was the middle of the night and he was so tired that he couldn't focus on the aisle in front of him. After the tenth yawn of the last five minutes, he finally gave up and pulled the phone out of his jeans' pocket and called again the last called number.

He yawned again just as Kurt picked up.

"_What's taking you so long?_"

Finn rolled his eyes at the impatient tone. "I'm trying to remember what you wanted." He wondered what Kurt would do if he and Carole hadn't moved back in before the Christmas break had started.

"_Fish sticks, vanilla ice-cream and chocolate chips._"

"Okay." Finn realized that he was standing in front of the pet aisle and sighed. "I just have to wake myself enough to get to the right aisle." He yawned again and started walking through the all-night supermarket.

"_Damn, I'm so sorry Finn. I can come pick you up. I don't want you crashing because of me._"

"No dude, you're sick, remember? That's why I'm here and you're at home." Finn sighed in relief when he found himself in front of the baking aisle. He picked up three packets of chocolate chips and then started looking for the frozen food section.

"_I'm sorry you had to wake up and drive in the middle of the night,_" Kurt said.

"It's not your fault you have crazy cravings."

Kurt sighed heavily on the other end of the line. "_Yeah… but I'm still sorry._"

Finn balanced the phone between his head and shoulder and picked up the fish sticks and the ice-cream closing the door of the freezer with his foot. "I'm done. I'm going to be home in a little while, okay? And don't worry."

"_Okay and thank you, Finn._"

Yawning again, he ended the call and put the phone back in his pocket trying not to drop anything. Then, he headed towards the cash register.

"Finn?"

Looking up from the items he was putting down on the conveyor belt, he found himself standing in front of his best friend. "What are you doing here?"

Puck looked at him as if he was a complete idiot. "Working," he answered, pointing to his uniform and name-tag.

"Sorry. I'm still sleeping."

Puck started checking Finn's items out, glancing up at him for a moment. "What are you doing here in the middle of the night?"

"Kurt wanted ice-cream with chocolate chips and fish sticks."

Puck looked disgusted for a moment before nodding with a frown. "The crazy cravings started?" He tried to hide the wistfulness in his voice. The thought that Finn was doing these kind of things for Kurt when it was supposed to be his job, was making him feel worse.

Finn nodded and yawned again.

"And he called you in the middle of the night so..."

"Man, I forgot to tell you. We haven't been talking a lot lately, have we? Me and mom moved back in a few days before the break started."

Puck told himself that he couldn't let himself be jealous. He knew that Kurt was over his crush on Finn, Rachel had told him that there was nothing between them, but the thought that Kurt was sharing his room with Finn, made his stomach tighten into knots.

"It's great that you help him so much," he found himself saying, trying to keep his mind away from picturing Kurt and Finn playing happy family.

"It's kind of my duty as a future step-brother and he's sick so he can't come himself." Finn rolled his eyes. "He already told me he was sorry I had to come at least a dozen times."

Puck looked up at him with worry evident in his eyes. "Sick?"

Finn frowned. "Yeah, but it's just a cold. Puck, why do you care so much?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." Puck lowered his head.

"First you almost killed Karofsky. Then you slusheed Sam while he was holding Kurt's hand and you're always looking at Kurt while we're dancing and if I noticed… then every one else probably already has too." Finn took a deep breath and studied his best friend who was shoving his items in a shopping bag like he was hoping Finn would just leave already. "Are you... Do you have a crush on Kurt?"

The words sounded strange to his own ears because he was talking about Puck, sex-shark Puck. It was

totally crazy, except that Puck didn't deny it. In fact, his hands had stilled and he wouldn't meet Finn's eyes.

"Puck?"

"Here's your stuff," Puck said hastily, pushing the bag towards Finn. He wanted to tell him everything because he was sure that he needed someone to talk to and his only option, at the moment, was Rachel and she was on Kurt's side so it really wouldn't do any good. He wanted to tell his best friend that somewhere between throwing Kurt into dumpsters and hearing him singing, he had started to like him and then they found themselves having sex and it was the best he'd ever had. He wanted to tell Finn that he was going to be a father, that Kurt was going to make him a dad and that he had screwed everything up because he was too afraid of actually being himself.

The words were stuck in his throat and he found himself still pretending, because maybe Finn would have been okay with him having a crush on Kurt, but not with him putting Kurt through hell even when they had something going on.

Above all, Finn wasn't going to pat him on the shoulder and tell him, 'that's good man,' with the way he had left Kurt to handle everything on his own because he wasn't man enough to be honest about himself.

"I'll pay for these," he said, nodding to the shopping bag.

"Why?"

"Christmas present."

Finn grinned at his best friend. "You don't even celebrate Christmas."

"Whatever. You better go before Kurt calls you again."

Finn picked up the bag and stared at his best friend for a moment. "You know how you always joked about me being in love with Kurt?" Puck nodded. "You always sounded like you wouldn't care, you know? Like you were just waiting for me to finally come out and be with Kurt."

"I was just joking, Finn."

"Yeah but it still sounded like I could come out and you wouldn't care, you'd still be my friend and Kurt is my brother now so I'm okay with the whole being gay thing. I..." he lowered his head in shame and sighed deeply. "Man, I'm practically sleeping so I don't know what the hell I'm saying, but, I was a total jerk with him and you know it, but now I'd like to think I'm different so you know, if you are gay or have a crush on Kurt, you can tell me, you'll still be my bro."

Puck looked at his best friend without knowing what to say. He felt even worse at hearing those things because he was betraying Finn's friendship in a way, but he also knew that it was already too late. Maybe, if when things with Kurt had started he had told him about it, things would be different, but he couldn't tell the truth now.

"I'm not gay," he found himself saying and he knew that that much was true because he still liked chicks, he just liked Kurt more, but he didn't know if that would ever change, he didn't even know if he'd find another dude hot after Kurt.

He found it hard sometimes, to think about life after high school and his only consolation (even though he wasn't ready to admit it), was that with his kid growing inside Kurt, Kurt could never forget him. "Just take these things and go home to Kurt."

He hated how that sounded even knowing that his jealousy was completely unfounded.

"Thanks, man."

Puck barely nodded at him before walking away.

Finn drove home all the while thinking about Puck's reaction. Between his best friend and Kurt, he was always feeling like he was missing something.

Once at home, while he fried the fish sticks and Kurt mixed the chocolate chips with the ice-cream, Finn said, "Puck's working at the grocery store now. He paid for these things, said it was a Christmas present."

Kurt stilled his movements and looked up at his future step-brother. "What?"

Finn glanced at him for a moment before shrugging and focusing his attention back on the frying-pan. "When I said that I was there because you were sick, he was concerned and told me he was paying for these. You know, in the last couple of weeks, he's been looking ready to punch Sam whenever he touched you and that day at glee, when you fell, he was really worried, he even followed you."

Kurt sighed heavily, lowering his gaze. He wondered why, if he had never wanted to publicly acknowledge him, Puck was now being so obvious. He also really wanted to ask him what had suddenly changed, why now he believed him.

Finn put the fish sticks in a plate and put it down on the table in front of Kurt.

"Thanks."

"I like being helpful." Kurt didn't start eating and Finn looked at him worriedly. "Are you okay?"

"Sure, why don' you go back to bed? You're tired."

"Yeah, I'm sleep walking right now." Finn yawned patting him on the shoulder before going back downstairs.

Kurt didn't sleep that night. He ate his crazy food and then cleaned everything up. His mind was full of questions that he knew he wouldn't get an answer to until they were back at school in January. He curled up on the couch remembering waking up to Puck's fingers sliding through his hair and turned on the TV. He tried not to think, but his mind was focused on only one person.

*GLEE*

That year, Christmas was special for Kurt. While he watched his dad laughing with Carole and he opened his presents with Finn, Kurt felt complete, like everything he had ever wanted growing up, was finally here. He felt guilty whenever he had those thoughts, almost ashamed of what his mother would think at being replaced, but Kurt knew that they hadn't replaced her, they had just added someone next to her. Burt still loved his dead wife deeply and always would just like Kurt still couldn't call Carole "mom" and still wanted her to be there sometimes, but at the same time, they had managed to move on because they had to and because it was time.

Burt and Kurt weren't religious, but decorating the house with Carole and Finn, having a big dinner all together, felt amazing and Kurt only hoped that his kid could have that same sensation of being part of a family.

New Year's Eve came and went and soon enough school started again. Now that they were living together, Finn and Kurt went to school together and left together and when Kurt wasn't with Finn, then he was with Sam. There were times when he hated the fact that he couldn't be on his own until he was back home, but being safe was important in that moment.

On the first day back, Kurt looked for Puck. He tried to do it in a subtle way but he really needed to talk to him.

His chance came right before lunch break. He had a pass from French because he had to go to the bathroom and saw Puck at his locker. The hall was empty and so he approached the other boy.

"I wanted to thank you," he said, and Puck turned around to look at him.

"What for?"

"For paying for those things Finn got me."

Puck shrugged. "It was nothing."

"Well, thank you." Kurt turned around ready to leave. He had a question he needed to ask, but he didn't know how to do it. He felt a hand gently grabbing his elbow, stilling him. Kurt glanced up at Puck from over his shoulder and the boy let him go.

Puck took an envelope out of his locker and handed it to Kurt. "I started working at the market so I could help you."

Kurt looked from the envelope to Puck, furrowing his brow in concentration. "Why?" he asked, taking the envelope from the boy.

Puck looked at him confused. "Why what?"

"Why do you suddenly believe me?"

For a moment, Kurt thought he saw guilt flash in the other boy's eyes.

"I... I talked with Rachel."

Kurt nodded. "And you believed her but you wouldn't believe me." Kurt closed his free hand into a fist. "Why wouldn't you believe me?"

"Because I had doubts okay?" Puck said frustrated. "I overheard Finn and Mercedes talking about you and I started thinking that maybe you hadn't lied and then Rachel made me think and I got it."

He looked at Kurt intently, trying to make him understand that he was sorry and that he was acting that way because that was the only way he knew how to be.

Kurt clenched the envelope in his hand and looked away from the boy standing in front of him. "I... I don't trust you," he said quietly, feeling how much it hurt having to say those words.

"Kurt..."

"You didn't believe me and you hurt me and now..." he shook his head. "I don't believe that you want to be around me because…. Puck, you can't be there for me now and think that people won't figure it out and if you think for one minute that I'm just going to go back to being your little secret, then just stay away. I don't need money. I need..."

He closed his eyes trying desperately trying not to cry. "I need you to be there because this is your baby too and..."

He looked up at Puck not caring if the boy saw the tears in his eyes. "You never wanted anyone to know about us and I can't make you come out, I won't make you come out, but you have to show me that you can be different. That you can care more about your kid than people calling you names, Puck. I need to know that you care, not about me, but about the baby."

Kurt looked at the envelope, then back at Puck. "Thank you. I honestly never thought would do something like this." He stood there staring at Puck for a few seconds before turning around and leaving.

Puck had started working because that was the only way he was able to let Kurt know that he wanted to be there. He knew something else that would make Kurt understand that he was serious, but the other way implied coming out, at least to the glee club.

For a moment, he debated on whether he was sure he wanted to throw his reputation away, or what was left of it anyway. But then he remembered seeing his mother struggle to raise him and his sister, he remembered hating their father for leaving them alone and in that moment, he knew exactly how much he was going to lose and what he was going to have to face, but he felt ready to face it because becoming a father changed everything, it even made him want to stop running away.

*GLEE*

"Mr. Schue, I have a song I'd like to… you know…can I?"

Mr. Schue nodded and waved him over before going to sit down on his chair next to the piano.

Puck cleared his throat. "This isn't really my style, and the dude that sings isn't even Jewish, but I like the song and well…" he shrugged. "It's fitting." He turned towards the jazz band and gave them the cue before taking a deep breath and start singing.

"_I can't tell you what it really is_

_I can only tell you what it feels like_

_And right now there's a steel knife_

_In my windpipe_

_I can't breathe_

_But I still fight_

_While I can fight_

_As long as the wrong feels right_

_It's like I'm in flight_

_High of a love_

_Drunk from the hate_

_It's like I'm huffing paint_

_And I love it the more that I suffer_

_I suffocate_

_And right before I'm about to drown_

_He resuscitates me_

_He fucking hates me_

_And I love it..._"

Kurt's eyes widened and he stopped staring at the floor to meet Puck's eyes even for just a moment before Puck closed his and kept on singing.

"_Wait_

_Where you going_

_I'm leaving you_

_No you ain't_

_Come back_

_We're running right back_

_Here we go again_

_It's so insane_

'_Cause when it's going good_

_It's going great_

_But when it's bad_

_It's awful_

_I feel so ashamed_

_I snap_

_Who's that dude_

_I don't even know his name_

_I laid hands on him_

_I'll never stoop so low again_

_I guess I don't know my own strength..._"

"_Just gonna stand there and watch me burn,_" Kurt started singing softly unable to stop himself from doing so. "_But that's alright because I like the way it hurts. Just gonna stand there and hear me cry. But that's alright because I love the way you lie, I love the way you lie, I love the way you lie._"

He never meant to sing Rihanna's part because it was something that wasn't fitting for him, was something that described Kurt's feelings and not his. But when he heard Kurt starting singing softly, Puck looked straight into Kurt's eyes before starting to sing again. The people standing in the choir room now openly staring at them didn't matter nor to Puck nor to Kurt because this was between them.

"_You ever loved somebody so much_

_You can barely breathe,_" he looked away for a moment trying to swallow around the lamp forming in his throat.

"_When you're with them_

_You meet_

_And neither one of you_

_Even know what hit 'em_

_Got that warm fuzzy feeling_

_Yeah them chills_

_You swore you'd_

_Never do nothing to hurt 'em_

_Now you're in each other's face_

_Spewing venom_

_And these words_

_When you spit 'em_

_You push_

_Pull each other's hair_

_Scratch, claw, bit 'em_

_Throw 'em down_

_Pin 'em_

_So lost in the moments_

_When you're in 'em_

_It's the rage that took over_

_It controls you both_

_So they say it's best_

_To go your separate ways_

_Guess that they don't know ya_

'_Cause today_

_That was yesterday_

_Yesterday is over_

_It's a different day_

_Sound like broken records_

_Playin' over_

_But you promised him_

_Next time you'll show restraint_

_You don't get another chance_

_Life is no Nintendo game_

_But you lied again_

_Now you get to watch him leave_

_Out the window_

_Guess that's why they call it window pane..._"

This time Puck was ready to let Kurt take over the song and watched him with open honesty waiting for his moment to sting again.

"_Now I know we said things_

_Did things_

_That we didn't mean_

_And we fall back_

_Into the same patterns_

_Same routine_

_But your temper's just as bad_

_As mine is_

_You're the same as me_

_But when it comes to love_

_You're just as blinded..._" Puck found himself giving Kurt a lopsided grin and was happy to see him return the gesture.

"_Baby please come back_

_It wasn't you_

_Baby it was me_

_Maybe our relationship_

_Isn't as crazy as it seems_

_Maybe that's what happens_

_When a tornado meets a volcano_

_All I know is_

_I love you too much_

_To walk away though_

_Come inside_

_Pick up your bags off the sidewalk_

_Don't you hear sincerity_

_In my voice when I talk_

_Told you this is my fault_

_Look me in the eyeball_

_Next time I'm pissed_

_I'll aim my fist_

_At the dry wall_

_Next time_

_There will be no next time_

_I apologize..._"

He stopped singing for a moment when he saw Kurt getting up from his chair to make his way over to him. He dropped his voice to an almost whisper when they were standing just a few inches apart. "_I'm tired of the games, I just want you back. If you ever try to fucking leave again I'm 'na tie you to the bed and set the house on fire._"

Kurt smiled at him swallowing the lump in his throat and wiping furiously at the tears that had started flowing down his cheeks. When he sang again, his voice was a little broke but he carried on nonetheless. Of all the things he thought Puck would do to show he cared, to show that he could be there, this wasn't one of them.

To see him standing in the middle of glee club, practically admitting that he had feelings for him, for a boy, made him feel like he was seeing that side of Puck that he only ever let show a few times when they were alone and in bed, talking, while they waited to start all over again.

"_Just gonna stand there and watch me burn, but that's alright because I like the way it hurts. Just gonna stand there and hear me cry, but that's alright because I love the way you lie, I love the way you lie. I love the way you lie._"

The music died away letting the silence fill the room. No one said or did anything for a long minute while they watched Puck and Kurt looking at each other as if they were having a thousands conversations simply through their eyes. Then, they were all startled when a chair screeched against the floor and Sam was suddenly standing.

Kurt closed his eyes because even without turning, he knew that Sam was staring at them. A moment later, Sam stalked across the room brushing against Kurt on his way out.

"What the hell just happened here?" Santana asked. She got up from her chair and walked over to where Kurt and Puck were standing. She glared at the latter crossing her arms in front of her chest. "Now you serenade to the fairy?"

Kurt shook his head not even wasting his time to acknowledge what she said. He looked at Puck for a moment trying to make him understand that they couldn't talk here with all of glee club staring at them. He walked over to his chair to retrieve his bag before excusing himself to Mr. Schue and leaving the choir room. He could hear Mercedes and Santana yelling at Puck demanding to know what was going on and Finn loudly saying, "Man, I asked you two weeks ago if you had something for him!" and of course Finn wouldn't understand that considering the song Puck had chose to sing, it wasn't about declaring love, it was about trying to make amends for past mistakes.

Kurt quickened his pace and was able to get out of the school while Sam was still there kicking at the wall. He walked over to the jock and with a voice that was barely a whisper, said, "Sam?"

The blond stiffened without turning around but stopping his kicking. "What do you want?"

"I..." Kurt reached out a hand as if to lay it on Sam's back but he stopped, closing it into a fist and lowering it to his side. "Why did you run away?"

"How can you be so stupid, Kurt?" he asked, his voice cold and hard. "You really think that just because he sang a song to you, now everything is going to be ok?"

"No, of course I don't." He took a deep breath and put his hands over his belly like he always did when he wanted to calm down. "I'm not that naïve, Sam. I'm not going to run back to him and play happy family or whatever you think is going to happen but..." he sighed. "Could you turn around please?"

Sam let a few moments go by in silence before slowly turning around. He met Kurt's eyes without worrying about hiding what he was feeling. He had been stupid to think that being there for Kurt was going to make the boy fall in love with him. He shook his head as if to get rid of his own naïve thoughts.

"What did you think that was going to happen, Sam? That I'd just fall in love with you? I needed a friend and you said that you could be that friend." Kurt lowered his gaze unable to look into Sam's hurt eyes. "I told you from the start that I could never love you like that. Getting back together with Noah or never seeing him again, won't change that."

"Why? He doesn't deserve you."

"I know," Kurt conceded. "I know that better than anyone else, believe me, but I love him and it's something I can help. It's stupid, I know, but no matter how much he hurts me, I'll never stop loving him." He swallowed and looked up at Sam again. "But I'm going to let him be there."

"Why?"

"Because I never thought that he'd say he loved me, least of all he'd do it in front of a room full of people. It's not enough to make things right between us, I know that I sang with him and now we will have to talk, but I'm not ready to simply ignore every thing that has happened between us and got back in whatever it was we had. But this baby is as much his as it's mine."

He took a step towards him. "He and I… we know what's it like to grow up without a parent and he's willing to throw everything away to be there for his kid. I have to let him be there. I'm selfish most of the time, but I can't be selfish about this."

"Kurt..." Sam shook his head and stepped forward, putting his hands on Kurt's shoulders. "He'll leave again and you know it. He may have said that he's sorry in a song, but he's going to hurt you again and..."

"People that love you will always have the power to hurt you, but that's not enough of a reason to stop loving someone. When I fell in love with him, I knew that it wasn't going to be a walk in the park but," he sighed and looked away again. "If it wasn't for this baby, I'd never have had the courage to walk away from him and now that he's willing to try, I'm going to give him a chance."

"I don't get you." Sam took his hands off of him and stepped back. "I don't get why you would do that to yourself. You think it's going to be easy to have him around you, around your baby and not give in and take him back? You're going to do it and you're going to regret it."

"I'm doing this for my kid, Sam, not for me. I don't want a boyfriend right now, whether it's someone as great as you or as bad as Noah and you have to respect my decision ok? I'll handle him."

"Then tell me what the hell you were doing singing with him if not giving in already."

Kurt felt anger rage inside him. "Look, I love you as a friend and I appreciate what you've been doing for me, more than you'll ever know but don't think for one moment that I owe you an explanation on something that is not of your concern."

Sam looked right in Kurt's eyes making him feel like he was being stripped naked. When the blond finally shook his head again, Kurt felt a sense of dread settling in the pit of his stomach. "You're going to get hurt again and when it happens, I won't be around to pick up the pieces."

"See, you're doing the same thing. You're hurting me. So how are you different from Puck? Huh?" He took a step backwards. "I'm so sick and tired of people being disappointed in me because I'm not meeting their expectations. I told you when you offered to help me that I was never going to love you back, so why in the hell are you playing the part of the wounded boyfriend?"

He could feel his breathing starting to get labored. He took deep breath and tried to calm himself down. He saw Sam's expression change from one of hurt, to one of worry and when he reached out to steady him, Kurt stepped back.

"DAMN IT!" he shouted.

"Kurt?"

He turned around when he heard Rachel softly calling his name. She walked over to him and hugged him even if Kurt didn't return the gesture. "Calm down. You need to calm down. Think about the baby." She started to rub his back until she felt him relaxing under her touch. "There you go." She sighed and pulled back trying to smile up at him. "You know that you have to take better care of yourself. C'mon, I'm taking you home." She looked at Sam like she'd look at Karofsky and Azimio.

Sam stepped back, letting them go and didn't even try to stop them. He simply stood rooted to the spot and watched them walk away, feeling ashamed of himself for getting Kurt upset when he knew that that was the last thing Kurt needed.


	10. Need You

_**A/N: I'm so sorry it took me this long! This chapter is a lot shorter than the previous ones, but I will try to write more and sooner for the next update! As always, thank you for reading and reviewing!**_

* * *

**Chapter 9 - Need You**

_I want you to want me. _  
_I need you to need me. _  
_I'd love you to love me._

Once Kurt was home, he tried to put every thought of Puck out of his mind. What he had told Sam was the truth and while he couldn't know for sure in the future whether he would get back together with Puck or not, he was sure that in that moment he wasn't going to.

Puck had been cruel with him, and a song and coming out to the glee club wasn't going to be enough to get back together, even though there was a part of his mind reminding him that Puck had told him that he loved him with that song.

However, it was enough to show that he cared, and Kurt could learn how to be selfless for his kid. If Puck was willing to be there, he wasn't going to deny his son the chance to grow up with both parents, even if one of said parents hadn't wanted to believe that the baby was his; and that was what had hurt the most, more than slushies and dumpster dives.

Instead of going down to his bedroom and sleeping for a while, Kurt decided to start working on dinner because Carole usually worked late and because it would keep his mind occupied. He was thankful that Finn was sleeping over at Mike's that night so he wouldn't have to answer to his questions at least for another day. Whatever he was going to tell Finn, was going to be a lie, a lie he was telling for Puck, and he couldn't stand the idea of lying to his future step-brother, not when he knew how hurt Finn was going to be once the truth came out.

* * *

"What the hell was that?"

The first person to ask was Mercedes while Puck was still staring at the door where Rachel had just walked out of.

Finn frowned and when he spoke, he sounded both angry and disappointed. "Dude, I asked you if you liked Kurt and you told me no."

"So you're gay for Hummel now?"

At Santana's question, Puck turned around, looking at everyone in the room before focusing on Finn. "I like him and I had to apologize, that's what the song was about." He walked over to his chair and picked up his bag.

"Where do you think you're going?" asked Mercedes. "I want to know what is going on. First Kurt sings with you, and then Sam storms out and Kurt and Rachel go after him. What the hell is going on?"

Puck sighed, turning around, without raising his gaze from the floor. "This is really complicated."

Mercedes snorted. "Of course it is. You're his bully."

"I stopped." Puck clenched his fists and narrowed his eyes. "And this really isn't any of your business." He looked over at Finn who was standing awkwardly near the door, his brow furrowed and looking confused. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you the truth." He slid his backpack on and then walked out of the choir room ignoring Mr. Schue calling after him.

He felt as if things could actually work out because Kurt had listened to the song, had sang with him, and the way he had smiled at the end, made Puck believe that he didn't screw everything up, not yet anyway. He just wanted to find Kurt and talk to him, ask him if what he had done was enough, if he could have another chance.

He frowned when he remembered that Kurt had left to go after Sam. Kurt had promised that there was nothing between them, but the doubt was still there because he still wasn't used at trusting people. He headed towards the school entrance and stopped when he saw Sam coming back inside.

"Where is Kurt?" he asked right away.

Sam looked up from the floor and when his eyes met Puck's they were cold and full of anger. He quickly walked up to Puck, grabbing his shirt and slamming him against the lockers.

"You don't deserve him," Sam hissed.

Puck pushed him back, hard, feeling the resentment he had towards the blond surging inside him. "You have to back off."

Sam closed his hands into tight fists ready to hit Puck despite knowing that in a fight, he would be the one who would end up losing. "Why should I?"

"Because that's my kid he's carrying and he is not going to be with you."

And that hit way too close to home. Sam pulled his arm back and hit Puck square on the mouth sending him staggering into the lockers behind him. "He's not going to come back to you."

Puck spat the blood down on the floor and had to stop himself from hitting back. He didn't want to be that guy anymore, he was afraid that fighting back would mean that Kurt would change his mind and not let him be a father.

He pulled himself away from the lockers feeling something trickling down his neck. He touched the back of his head with his hand and saw blood on his fingers. He frowned and looked up at Sam. "We'll see about that," he said, before turning around to leave.

"He said he's going to let you be there for him," Sam called out to him. Puck stilled and glanced back at him from over his shoulder. "He said he doesn't want to have you as a boyfriend."

"Whatever you think you're doing, back the fuck off, because if there's one thing my old man taught me, is that you have to be there if you want your kid to be someone. So I'm going to be there and Kurt will forgive me because he loves _me,_ not you." What he was never going to say to anyone, was that despite what he did or what he said, he needed Kurt to need him, he needed someone to make him feel like he was worth. It was when he had started realizing how much he wanted Kurt to love him, that he had started to pull back. The fear of finding out that even to Kurt he was just an easy lay, was something that kept him from getting too close, even when Kurt had told him to love him. And now he had to believe that it wasn't going to be too late, that his fear hadn't cost him everything he could have.

He didn't wait for an answer or to get hit again before he left the school.

He was getting inside the pick-up when his phone rang. When he checked the caller ID, he saw that it was Finn. He debated whether he should answer or not for a few moments before deciding that he had to listen at least to Finn.

"Hey," he said, picking up.

"_So you like him, right?_" Finn asked right away.

"Yes. I should have told you, but we're dudes and we don't talk about..."

"_Stop,_" Finn said, cutting him off. "_Remember when you paid for those things? I knew you cared so cut the shit with me, alright? I told you I was going to be okay with it._"

"Yeah, about that..." The words were stuck in his throat. If he told Finn the truth, he would find himself alone and even though he knew that the right thing to do was being honest, he wasn't ready for that yet. He couldn't even start to think about what would happen the next day at school when he saw everyone from glee again. "Thank you," he ended up saying.

"_Don't mention it._" Finn sighed heavily. "_You're going to have to face some hard stuff now._"

"I know." Puck laughed humorlessly. "It's going to be worse than with you and Sam because I kept bulling people. They will see it like some sort of ammunition and..."

"_But remember when we had to choose between Glee and football and you chose glee?_" Finn cut him off again.

"Yeah."

"_You chose what you wanted, you were braver than me. You can do it, dude. Kurt is totally worth it._"

Puck nodded leaning his forehead against the steering wheel. He was feeling a head ache coming. "Thanks, dude."

"_So, it looked like Kurt was into you too. Are you going to ask him out or something?_"

'_We're past that, now,_' he thought. "I'll have to talk to him."

"_Of course. Everyone's freaking out by the way and Rachel called me and said that she took Kurt home. You can come around if you want. Speak in a safe place or something_. _But if you want me to be there, then you will have to come tomorrow because I'm sleeping over at Mike's tonight._"

"Yeah, I'll think about it." Puck leaned back letting his head rest against the seat. He hissed when his wound came in contact with the headrest. "Look, Finn, I have to go now, okay?"

"_Sure. Later, dude._"

Puck ended the call and started the pick-up. He wondered if what Sam had said was the truth. He thought back about Kurt's words when he had thanked him for the money and for buying those things for him at Christmas. He was pretty sure that getting to be there for his kid wasn't going to mean getting back with Kurt too. A part of his mind told him that it was better that way, that being a parent at seventeen was hard enough without having a relationship that had started for all the wrong reasons.

He had to shake his head a few times when a wave of dizziness hit him.

"A concussion, just what I needed." He would have to talk to his mother now and she will just call him a delinquent and say that things would never change.

* * *

Kurt blinked his eyes a few times when he heard the sound of the window being opened. When his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he was able to make out the figure walking towards his bed. He pulled himself up on his elbows and sighed.

"What are you doing here?" His voice sounded hoarse from the sleep.

"I know it's late," Puck said and even in the darkness, Kurt could see him running a hand over his mohawk and then heard him hiss. He frowned but didn't say anything.

Puck sighed heavily and walked closer to the bed. Of all the thoughts running wild through his head, he found himself saying, "You didn't lock the window." At the moment, he felt like it was the most important thing. It felt like Kurt hadn't given up on him completely.

Kurt took a deep breath and pulled himself up. He shifted closer to the edge of the bed and sat Indian-style. "I forgot to lock it," he said, even though it was a lie and he knew that Puck would understand. The truth was that locking that window felt like writing an ending to what they had and he wasn't ready for that, not yet. "Why are you here?"

Puck sat down on the floor, leaning back against the bed, his knees bent. He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against his knees but he didn't say anything.

Kurt shifted closer, his hand reaching out for a moment, the desire to run his hand through Puck's mohawk to calm him down was almost unbearable, but at the last moment, he closed his hand into a fist and lowered it. "They didn't get it… did they?"

"Nope. I thought only Finn wouldn't pick up on what I meant, but it turns out, the others are just as dumb." He sighed and laughed. "They thought I was just declaring my love for you and apologizing for throwing you into dumpsters or shoving you into lockers."

Kurt bit down on his lower lip and couldn't stop himself from getting a little bit closer. "Why did you do it?"

"I thought it was pretty clear."

"Do you want to be there for the baby?"

Puck shrugged. "That too."

"Puck..."

"You know about my father, Kurt. I should have trusted you but..." Puck trailed off and Kurt wondered on what he was holding back, why he couldn't just be honest. They were standing in Kurt's bedroom, in the darkness, completely alone. "I want to help you and be there. For both of you," he added after a moment.

Kurt lay back on the bed, curled on his side so his eyes could remain focused on Puck's form. His knees were almost touching Puck's back but it felt like they were miles apart in that moment. Puck was back at being closed off like every time they had sex and right afterward, he would pull back on his clothes and leave.

"Okay," Kurt said quietly, and he was almost surprised at how detached he sounded.

"Thank you." Puck turned around a little so he could look at Kurt. He put his elbow on the mattress and tried to find Kurt's face in the dim light of the room. "I..."

"But I'm not included," Kurt cut him off. He interrupted Puck from saying anything else because part of him was afraid he was going to ask Kurt to go back together and because another part was afraid he wouldn't. "You can be there for the baby and be a father, but I'm not included."

Puck looked down, took a deep breath and clenched the sheets in his hand. It was something he was expecting after all. "Okay." His voice shaky.

"What happened to your head?" Kurt asked quietly after long moments of silence.

"Nothing."

"Puck..."

"I got in a fight with Sam, after you left."

Kurt raised both his eyebrows in surprise. "He hit you?"

Puck snorted. "I'm surprised that you didn't ask me if I started it." He said quietly.

"He was upset when I left." Kurt kept his eyes shut and he could feel Puck's gaze on him, could feel the boy standing so close that it wouldn't take them much to touch each other. "It's not hard to figure it out."

"I didn't hit him back."

"Okay," Kurt said quietly and he believed him, he truly did. It felt like the only right thing to say in that moment. He waited a few minutes before asking, "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," Puck nodded. "I hit my head against the lockers. I had to talk with my mom and of course she thought that it was my fault, but she checked me over and said I didn't need to go to the hospital."

"I'm glad." Kurt opened his eyes and looked at Puck, found him staring at him. "I didn't really think you would do it. Coming out I mean."

"I know."

"And you're here now. You sneaked in even though you knew dad and Carole are still up." Kurt smiled, closing his eyes again but without turning away from Puck. It felt nice talking with Puck, he couldn't remember ever spending so much time just talking.

Puck shrugged, diverting his gaze. "I wanted to talk to you before you had enough time to think that I wasn't honest or something."

"Are you going to tell Finn?" Kurt asked tentatively. "Because I'm not going to tell him, it wouldn't be right."

"Not yet," Puck answered honestly. That was going to be hard.

They didn't say anything after that. They listened to the sound of Burt and Carole moving around upstairs, the TV being turned off, the voices growing distant. Kurt felt relaxed in that moment, as if the mere thought of Puck being there helped him a little, even though it still hurt.

He felt fingers gently brush against his forehead, he felt the heat radiating off of Puck's body getting closer. Then Puck's lips were leaving a kiss on his forehead and Kurt almost reached out to grab Puck's shirt to keep him close, but just as suddenly as the touch had come, it was gone.

"Good night, Kurt." He heard Puck walking away and the window being opened and shut.

Kurt buried his face in the pillow and squeezed his eyes shut against the ache in his heart.

* * *

_The wheels of the little red car were tickling his belly but Kurt couldn't bring himself to be annoyed or ask him to stop. Puck was making all the noises a car would and just kept going up and down his round stomach. Kurt moved the book he was reading aside a little so he could look down at Puck. A smile made its way on his face. "What are you doing?" _

"_Playing with my son." _

_Kurt laughed. "What if he doesn't like cars? Maybe he'd like it best if you read to him."_

"_I have my Harry Potter's books at home. Next time you come over, we will read to him." Puck looked up at Kurt and let the car fall down on the bed. He pulled himself up on his hands and looked down at Kurt, the way his eyes were shining, the way he was smiling. He brought up one hand and caressed Kurt's cheek. He smiled before leaning down to bring their lips together... _

Puck's eyes shot open and he laid there on his bad alone, staring up at the ceiling while the last image of his dream was still in front of his eyes. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to stay in that perfect moment a little while longer but then he heard knocking on his bedroom door right before his mom started calling for him to wake up for school.

He was sure in that moment that no matter how hard it was going to be, he was going to make it work.


End file.
